I was having this beautiful dream. Everything was perfect about it. Everything about the landscape and ambient soundscape and lighting were enough to give my heart a euphoric buzz. The same euphoric buzz we get from love, and I also sort of get from long depressing winters in isolation. It may have actually even been winter in the dream, but I can' ( Read more... )

I often find myself wondering what it is that attracts me to such dark and generally isolating art forms. I'm fairly certain that I'm genetically predisposed to depression and isolationism. It seems to run on my father's side of the family, though they don't really take to the darker side of things. They aren't the type to sit up late, drinking ( Read more... )

I hate how often I think its earlier than it actually is. I'll get lost in internetting for a few hours and feel like only a half hour has passed. My sense of time is really weird in how it dilates. I was listening to some minimal percussive/ambient recording I must've done last march or april, probably while playing hooky from work. In the ( Read more... )

There's a blizzard back home. Winter is acting as it should for the first time in a while. A white Christmas is coming. I don't even like Christmas. But I pretend a little bit for everyone else. This is the first year I've spent it away from home, and far away from home at that. It's kind of a relief, yet a bit disheartening. I guess I'm not really ( Read more... )

Sometimes while getting all introspective I ask myself a question about the way that I think which I cannot answer. I guess this actually happens fairly often when I get so introspective ( Read more... )