Hai guyz! How's this for irony? Michael Vick is getting an award that was started because of a man who fought against child abuse (if only it had been against dog abuse, then that would be icing, cherry and soya whipped cream on top!)  Unbeknownst to you and me, it takes IMMENSE COURAGE (capitalized to emphasize the immenseness) to kill under- ( Read more... )

So there's these two loose dogs. A man, A MAN, is able to get the dogs to come to him with biscuits. He chained up one dog, while the other remained loose. He calls police.
And they send one female police officer. What? Are living in the 21st century or something? Clearly this was a job for a man. The sole woman officer realized the error of her ( Read more... )

While I am pleased the Raiders defeated the Eagles (and thus, in my mind, Vick), I cannot help but find it sadly amusing that the head coach of the Raiders is up on charges of felony assault after he broke the jaw of an assistant coach. If he is found guilty, let's bet that he won't see a pay cut or be barred from coaching in the NFL. WHY DO WE ( Read more... )

Okay, light is green for going straight. I need to turn right. There's a person in the crosswalk crossing the street.

I am the only person who stops for the person to cross. Four cars in front of me sneak in ahead of the guy, one when the guy was only about two feet from the car.

And get this: As I wait patiently for him to get all the way on the ( Read more... )

If you ever plan on shooting and killing a bunch of people only to kill yourself in the end, please save the rest of us the heartache and just kill yourself first.

A woman called 911 three times when a McDonald's ran out of McNuggets.

Yes, the store should have reimbursed her (you can't claim it's store policy that all sales are final when the sale doesn't actually result in, you know, the transfer of a product).

But calling 911?

I'm trying not to laugh, because CLEARLY this woman has issues but come on:

"This ( Read more... )

If it is pouring rain, do you ( Read more... )

In the 15 items or fewer checkout at a local grocery store, I stood behind a woman who had 30 items. I counted!

"Interesting concept of 15 items or fewer, eh?" I asked.

"Huh?" she replid.

I stare, for a moment, hoping she'll comprehend my question. A blank stare is my reply.

"Well, it's just that you seem to have a lot more than 15 items," I try to ( Read more... )

In my mind, when I think florist, I think aromatic flowers.

My local florist feels differently and only stocks fake, silk flowers.

I feel this is a violation of the trust I place in my local florist, that she will provide me with pretty, real flowers and not fake ones.  

We've had visitors of Fruitland attacked by pit bulls, boiling over their fences

Somebody left the pit bulls on the stove for too long, and now they are just boiling over. They especially like to boil over fences, because that takes a lot of skill...we all know pit bulls like to be skillful. They can exert five billion pounds of pressure in order to ( Read more... )