I Will Never Stop Loving You
Guy punched him again, and again there was no response. On the third hit, Guy cracked two of Robin’s ribs. He felt them break beneath his fist and yelled, screamed. Not because he’d broken bones, but because Robin hadn’t felt it. Guy stopped, hands shaking as he ripped at the collar of the outlaw’s shirt, loosening it from around his neck. For one last time a fist slammed into Robin’s stomach, breaking another rib. But it worked.
Robin’s eyes snapped open as he spluttered and coughed, water spilling from between his lips. He rolled sideways, only dimly aware of the hand rubbing his back until he heard what Guy was saying.
“Come on Hood...” muttered the older man. The other flinched away from the hand.
“No.” Said Robin. “No more Hood.” Speaking caused coughing to start again and Guy shushed him and rubbed at his back until he’d stopped.
“I thought I’d killed you, Hood.” Said Guy after a few minuets had slipped by.
“Well you had a damn good try.” Robin retorted, not yet looking directly at Gisborne. “And I already told you not to call me that. No more Hood.” A smile ghosted on Guy’s lips, not taking Robin seriously.
“What am I meant to call you then? And why ‘no more Hood’?”
“Just Robin would do.” Their eyes met for the first time. “Because Robin ‘Hood’ already died in the Holy Land. With Marian.”
Guy had wondered how long it would be before her name was mentioned. Even when she was alive she had always worked her way into any situation between himself and Robin, whether physically or otherwise. Why should that stop just because she was dead? Guy was saved having to think of some way to respond when Robin spoke again.
“An innocent woman died because of Hood.” His voice was both bitter and hurt at the same time.
“Of all the things Marian was,” Guy shook his head “innocent was not one of them.”
“Is that why you killed her?”
“No!”
“Then why?”
Guy got to his feet and began to pace. Robin had been subconsciously leaning against him and now fell flat onto his back. He rubbed at his side, ribs aching. His eyes followed Guy, waiting for a reply.
“Because she loved you!” It left Gisborne’s mouth as a shout. “Because she loved you and you loved her. Because she was going to marry you and-“
“Did marry me. I married her before she died.” Robin corrected but it barely even caused Guy to pause, as if he had known all along.
“Because she married you and would have always been with you and...And...” Guy faltered, seemingly run out of words.
“And because you could never compete with that.” Supplied Robin.
Guy stopped pacing, let all his breath out at once and slumped down against a tree, facing Robin. He could look right into the outlaw’s face from here. Even now, Guy couldn’t help but think how good that face looked. It screwed up with effort though as Robin heaved his battered body to sit up. Guy watched as Robin tried to get to his feet and fell down again. Wordlessly, Guy got up and moved to sit behind him. He pulled Robin back against his chest and wrapped an arm round the younger man. Feeling this Robin leant back to rest his head on Guy’s shoulder and closed his eyes. It felt safe. Familiar.
“Why do we do this to each other?” the thief sighed. Gisborne’s fingers were tracing patterns across Robin’s chest. Robin could feel Guy’s breath against his ear as he whispered.
“Did you love her?”
“You know I did.”
“And me?” the fingers paused in their movement.
“Yes. Yes I did love you too...I still do.”
“Even now?” a hint of surprise had found its way into Guy’s voice.
“I know I shouldn’t, but I do.” Robin moved his hand to his own chest to link with Guy’s. “That’s our problem, isn’t it? We couldn’t choose, we wanted two things at the same time. But we lost her anyway.” Tears ran down Robin’s bruised face. “And now I think I’ve lost you too.”
“No.” Guy’s voice was thick with his own tears. “I still love you. I will never stop loving you.”
The silence that fell this time lasted a lot, lot longer than before. The sound of the river bubbling and the birds singing were soothing. Every part of Robin ached and he could not keep himself awake. He slipped into sleep more than once but only for a few minuets. Guy was very quiet and Robin thought maybe he was asleep too until he felt fingers under his chin tilting his head back so he had to look into his lover’s eyes.
“So what will you do?” the man looking down at him questioned. “If Robin Hood is dead, I mean.”
“Dunno.” Shrugged Robin. “I’ll go away. Disappear.” As soon as he said that, Robin regretted it. Pain and sorrow in equal measure flashed across Guy’s face.
“Is that what you really want?” Guy asked, smiling sadly. Robin looked away, not wanting to see hurt in those eyes again as he nodded. Guy took a deep breath, as though stealing himself to do something.
“Then I'm going to help you.” He announced. “And I’ll come with you too.”
“What?!” Robin yelped and sat up too quickly. His head swam and his body protested but he barely noticed now. “How?!”
“I’ll tell the Sheriff you’re dead, that I killed you by throwing you from the cliff.” It was as though Guy had been planning this in his head. He probably had during the time they had lain there together. “He won’t stop searching for you if he knows you’re alive but if he thinks you’re dead, then it gives us a chance.”
“And what about you? Where will you say you’re going?”
“No one will miss me Robin.” And with that, Guy leant forwards and kissed the other on the lips. When they broke apart Guy’s fingers moved to the fine chain around Robin’s neck.
“You still have the ring?”
“Of course. I always wear it.”
“I gave that to you so you could sell it. So that you and your men wouldn’t starve in winter.” Guy chuckled and shook his head. Robin shook his head too but he wasn’t laughing.
“I couldn’t sell a gift from you.” The younger man wanted to change the subject away from any mention of his gang. Former gang now.
“It wasn’t a gift, not really.” Guy got to his feet, careful not to let Robin fall like last time. He brushed dirt down from his legs. “I’ll go back to Nottingham then. There are plenty of caves around here so hide there until I get back.”
“Alright.” Said robin, as though Guy had merely offered him a drink of water.
Guy didn’t kiss Robin again or say goodbye, because he’d be returning soon. He could kiss Robin all he liked when they were away from Nottingham and the ghosts of Marian. Instead he raised one hand and waved briefly before turning walking away down stream again.
Robin waited until he couldn’t hear the sound of footsteps anymore before he got to his feet. He wasn’t hurting as much as he had been before. He supposed he should be thankful that the cliff was not nearly as high as it looked, and that he had landed in the deepest part of the river. His ribs were painful though. He was going to have to get Guy back for that.
His mind was so full of Guy, and what they were now going to do that he wasn’t paying attention to where he was walking. He didn’t notice that the ground in front of him dropped steeply downwards until it was too late. He lost his footing and pitched forwards, franticly grabbing a branch to stop himself. It didn’t work. He felt and heard his shoulder dislocate as he continued to fall and was forced to let go of the branch. Stupidly, he called out for Guy even though he knew he was nowhere near.
As his head connected with a rock and he lost consciousness, the last thing that flashed through Robin’s thoughts was that he hoped Guy found him soon. But, of course, Tuck found him first and hid him somewhere Guy couldn’t find him. And Robin Hood was forced to come back to life to save his friends. And when he next saw Guy he had to pretend to nearly kill him, and really did cut across his cheek, drawing blood. He hoped it wouldn’t scar.
And then, as Robin knelt beneath a tree, the purple stoned ring in his hand, he realised that he and Guy had maybe lost their last chance to be together. Still...
I will never stop loving you. Guy’s words came back to Robin and he repeated them before kissing the ring one last time and burying it. As he pushed the last of the earth back into place he paused, head bent. He hoped it would not be the last gift he received from Guy.
I will never stop loving you.
Robin’s eyes snapped open as he spluttered and coughed, water spilling from between his lips. He rolled sideways, only dimly aware of the hand rubbing his back until he heard what Guy was saying.
“Come on Hood...” muttered the older man. The other flinched away from the hand.
“No.” Said Robin. “No more Hood.” Speaking caused coughing to start again and Guy shushed him and rubbed at his back until he’d stopped.
“I thought I’d killed you, Hood.” Said Guy after a few minuets had slipped by.
“Well you had a damn good try.” Robin retorted, not yet looking directly at Gisborne. “And I already told you not to call me that. No more Hood.” A smile ghosted on Guy’s lips, not taking Robin seriously.
“What am I meant to call you then? And why ‘no more Hood’?”
“Just Robin would do.” Their eyes met for the first time. “Because Robin ‘Hood’ already died in the Holy Land. With Marian.”
Guy had wondered how long it would be before her name was mentioned. Even when she was alive she had always worked her way into any situation between himself and Robin, whether physically or otherwise. Why should that stop just because she was dead? Guy was saved having to think of some way to respond when Robin spoke again.
“An innocent woman died because of Hood.” His voice was both bitter and hurt at the same time.
“Of all the things Marian was,” Guy shook his head “innocent was not one of them.”
“Is that why you killed her?”
“No!”
“Then why?”
Guy got to his feet and began to pace. Robin had been subconsciously leaning against him and now fell flat onto his back. He rubbed at his side, ribs aching. His eyes followed Guy, waiting for a reply.
“Because she loved you!” It left Gisborne’s mouth as a shout. “Because she loved you and you loved her. Because she was going to marry you and-“
“Did marry me. I married her before she died.” Robin corrected but it barely even caused Guy to pause, as if he had known all along.
“Because she married you and would have always been with you and...And...” Guy faltered, seemingly run out of words.
“And because you could never compete with that.” Supplied Robin.
Guy stopped pacing, let all his breath out at once and slumped down against a tree, facing Robin. He could look right into the outlaw’s face from here. Even now, Guy couldn’t help but think how good that face looked. It screwed up with effort though as Robin heaved his battered body to sit up. Guy watched as Robin tried to get to his feet and fell down again. Wordlessly, Guy got up and moved to sit behind him. He pulled Robin back against his chest and wrapped an arm round the younger man. Feeling this Robin leant back to rest his head on Guy’s shoulder and closed his eyes. It felt safe. Familiar.
“Why do we do this to each other?” the thief sighed. Gisborne’s fingers were tracing patterns across Robin’s chest. Robin could feel Guy’s breath against his ear as he whispered.
“Did you love her?”
“You know I did.”
“And me?” the fingers paused in their movement.
“Yes. Yes I did love you too...I still do.”
“Even now?” a hint of surprise had found its way into Guy’s voice.
“I know I shouldn’t, but I do.” Robin moved his hand to his own chest to link with Guy’s. “That’s our problem, isn’t it? We couldn’t choose, we wanted two things at the same time. But we lost her anyway.” Tears ran down Robin’s bruised face. “And now I think I’ve lost you too.”
“No.” Guy’s voice was thick with his own tears. “I still love you. I will never stop loving you.”
The silence that fell this time lasted a lot, lot longer than before. The sound of the river bubbling and the birds singing were soothing. Every part of Robin ached and he could not keep himself awake. He slipped into sleep more than once but only for a few minuets. Guy was very quiet and Robin thought maybe he was asleep too until he felt fingers under his chin tilting his head back so he had to look into his lover’s eyes.
“So what will you do?” the man looking down at him questioned. “If Robin Hood is dead, I mean.”
“Dunno.” Shrugged Robin. “I’ll go away. Disappear.” As soon as he said that, Robin regretted it. Pain and sorrow in equal measure flashed across Guy’s face.
“Is that what you really want?” Guy asked, smiling sadly. Robin looked away, not wanting to see hurt in those eyes again as he nodded. Guy took a deep breath, as though stealing himself to do something.
“Then I'm going to help you.” He announced. “And I’ll come with you too.”
“What?!” Robin yelped and sat up too quickly. His head swam and his body protested but he barely noticed now. “How?!”
“I’ll tell the Sheriff you’re dead, that I killed you by throwing you from the cliff.” It was as though Guy had been planning this in his head. He probably had during the time they had lain there together. “He won’t stop searching for you if he knows you’re alive but if he thinks you’re dead, then it gives us a chance.”
“And what about you? Where will you say you’re going?”
“No one will miss me Robin.” And with that, Guy leant forwards and kissed the other on the lips. When they broke apart Guy’s fingers moved to the fine chain around Robin’s neck.
“You still have the ring?”
“Of course. I always wear it.”
“I gave that to you so you could sell it. So that you and your men wouldn’t starve in winter.” Guy chuckled and shook his head. Robin shook his head too but he wasn’t laughing.
“I couldn’t sell a gift from you.” The younger man wanted to change the subject away from any mention of his gang. Former gang now.
“It wasn’t a gift, not really.” Guy got to his feet, careful not to let Robin fall like last time. He brushed dirt down from his legs. “I’ll go back to Nottingham then. There are plenty of caves around here so hide there until I get back.”
“Alright.” Said robin, as though Guy had merely offered him a drink of water.
Guy didn’t kiss Robin again or say goodbye, because he’d be returning soon. He could kiss Robin all he liked when they were away from Nottingham and the ghosts of Marian. Instead he raised one hand and waved briefly before turning walking away down stream again.
Robin waited until he couldn’t hear the sound of footsteps anymore before he got to his feet. He wasn’t hurting as much as he had been before. He supposed he should be thankful that the cliff was not nearly as high as it looked, and that he had landed in the deepest part of the river. His ribs were painful though. He was going to have to get Guy back for that.
His mind was so full of Guy, and what they were now going to do that he wasn’t paying attention to where he was walking. He didn’t notice that the ground in front of him dropped steeply downwards until it was too late. He lost his footing and pitched forwards, franticly grabbing a branch to stop himself. It didn’t work. He felt and heard his shoulder dislocate as he continued to fall and was forced to let go of the branch. Stupidly, he called out for Guy even though he knew he was nowhere near.
As his head connected with a rock and he lost consciousness, the last thing that flashed through Robin’s thoughts was that he hoped Guy found him soon. But, of course, Tuck found him first and hid him somewhere Guy couldn’t find him. And Robin Hood was forced to come back to life to save his friends. And when he next saw Guy he had to pretend to nearly kill him, and really did cut across his cheek, drawing blood. He hoped it wouldn’t scar.
And then, as Robin knelt beneath a tree, the purple stoned ring in his hand, he realised that he and Guy had maybe lost their last chance to be together. Still...
I will never stop loving you. Guy’s words came back to Robin and he repeated them before kissing the ring one last time and burying it. As he pushed the last of the earth back into place he paused, head bent. He hoped it would not be the last gift he received from Guy.
I will never stop loving you.