(no subject)
My stomach is killing me and I am very, very grumpy. I can't recall a time when I actually missed having a cycle. Don't think about what that means too hard. But with blood sugar under control your body does all sorts of normal things. Annoying.
I'm also obsessing and that's almost never a good thing. In my treatment of personality disorders class we're learning briefly about DBT and mindfulness training. I'm trying a few of the techniques and they seem to help, but nights like this when I'm tired and trying to avoid thinking about homework I go off on other things. To be honest, this class is both fascinating and utterly disheartening. I don't think I'm completely disordered, but I have so many flavors of borderline personality disorder that I really do need to do something about it. But if I go into therapy and allude to that fact, a goodly amount of therapists will show me the door. I'm not that bad though--and I hardly think I'd file any lawsuits against them to start drama. I'd just annoy them with my insight paired with actually doing nothing about it.
All I can think is: One fucking day at a time.
But then my head gets going and I just think and think and think and think. Is this better, or worse? It's just dragging it out. Ugh, definitely dragging it out.
I'm also obsessing and that's almost never a good thing. In my treatment of personality disorders class we're learning briefly about DBT and mindfulness training. I'm trying a few of the techniques and they seem to help, but nights like this when I'm tired and trying to avoid thinking about homework I go off on other things. To be honest, this class is both fascinating and utterly disheartening. I don't think I'm completely disordered, but I have so many flavors of borderline personality disorder that I really do need to do something about it. But if I go into therapy and allude to that fact, a goodly amount of therapists will show me the door. I'm not that bad though--and I hardly think I'd file any lawsuits against them to start drama. I'd just annoy them with my insight paired with actually doing nothing about it.
All I can think is: One fucking day at a time.
But then my head gets going and I just think and think and think and think. Is this better, or worse? It's just dragging it out. Ugh, definitely dragging it out.