[couples therapy: week 5, prompt 2]
Nathaniel drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair.
"Dr. Essex?"
"I am thinking," Nathaniel said shortly, fixing Dr. Saito with a look. "I do not answer questions as quickly as Rachel."
"It's a pretty simple question, Dr. Essex," Dr. Saito said in an even tone. "Don't you think?"
"Yes," Nathaniel said, somewhat exasperated. While he did not want to pummel the man nearly as much as he had when this tiresome therapy had begun, he still hated answering these kinds of questions. "I do trust Rachel. It is the how much part of the question which is giving me pause."
"Why?"
Nathaniel sighed. "Do you realize, Saito, the last time I was in a committed relationship of any kind, it was Victorian England? And we had a vastly different idea of marriage than you have today."
"You and Rachel aren't married, though."
Nathaniel waved his hand. "That is a technicality. The commitment level, to me, is the same."
"interesting. So you're saying, if I'm correct, you think of Rachel like your wife?"
"I suppose I do," Nathaniel said, looking out the window. "I have never thought of it that way before, as we cannot get married."
"Why?"
Nathaniel turned his gaze back towards Dr. Saito. "You have read my file, yes? Her family would attempt to vaporize me."
"I see."
Nathaniel sighed again. "No, I do not believe you do. In my day, marriage was an economic necessity. That is no longer the case. Rachel is--though I have no idea if she is aware--on my health insurance. She is in my will. I have a checking account with her name on it that I may deposit money into. Marriage is not necessary for these things, so, therefore, marriage is not necessary."
"You have a will?"
"Certainly." Nathaniel cocked his head. The tone in which Saito had asked that was different than he used for most of his questions. It took Nathaniel a moment to realize the man was amused. He raised a brow. "Why is that so amusing, then?"
"You're immortal," Saito said, and gave a small smile. "I just...I have a weird job. Supervillains talking about wills. Does Rachel think the same way, Dr. Essex, about marriage? Have you asked her?"
"I do not think she is interested in marrying me, no. Again, I do not see the necessity."
"But does she? You may have these reasons, but does she know them? Or does she think that you aren't marrying her for other reasons?"
"I believe she understands, but I shall bring it up with her to be certain."
"Would you? Marry her? If she wanted it?"
"Dr. Saito, I have no idea how the legality of that would even be possible. I am immortal and technically, I suppose, a citizen of England. Rachel was born in the future. You work out the legalities of that."
"Point," Dr. Saito said, smiling. "Just answer, though, please. If she really wanted you to?"
"I do not believe she does, but yes. If she wished it. I hardly see that it would change much, though. Plenty of modern women marry and do not even bear their husband's surname. It would be the same thing with a tiresome government sanction. I find that silly, as, I believe, does Rachel."
"Would you like her to have your surname?"
Nathaniel actually smiled. "Only to see her father's reaction."
Dr. Saito's eyebrow went up. "You have some irritation towards Rachel's father?"
"Only that he treats her so badly. None of it is my own. I know why he despises me, I simply think it is illogical that hatred should carry over to her just because we are together."
"Not everyone thinks as logically as you, Essex."
"A pity," Nathaniel answered smoothly.
"Our time is almost up, but you still have to answer my question. Do you trust Rachel, and how much?"
"I trust Rachel implicitly," Nathaniel said, because it was true. "Almost as much as I trust myself."
Saito nodded, slowly. "I see. Out of curiosity, would you have said that about your wife, about Rebecca?"
Nathaniel thought about that for a long time. "Before my son died, yes. Afterwards, she looked for comfort in God. I cannot trust someone who believes so completely in a fallacy."
"Does Rachel believe in God?"
"I have never asked her. But if she does, she does not use it as a crutch. She does not hide behind that belief in order to avoid the harshness of life. I could have accepted Rebecca's belief in God. I could not accept her using it as a source of blame. Adam died because he was sick, and I--" Nathaniel stopped, suddenly.
"And you, what?"
"It does not matter. I am here to talk about Rachel. Not Rebecca. That is long past, and they are long dead." Nathaniel's voice was cold. He did not see the relevance.
"And if Rachel decided she wanted to blame God for her past?"
"She wouldn't. Rachel doesn't blame anyone but herself, to be quite honest, as silly as that is of her."
"Like you do." Saito arched a brow when Nathaniel scowled. "Isn't that what you were going to say, about your son? You blame yourself, and Rachel blames herself for a lot of things. Her past, I suspect. She thinks it's her fault her father hates her."
"No. It is my fault entirely. That, I shan't ever doubt. It appears our time is up," Nathaniel said, standing. His face had gone remote, closed. He knew this particular expression bothered Saito. It bothered everyone.
"All right. I'll see you both next week. Have a nice day, Dr. Essex."
Nathaniel didn't bother responding to the platitude. He simply left the office, walked out into the warm sun, to where his Lexus was parked. He checked in with Rachel, who was in class. She sent him a warm hello, slightly distracted by her class and the lecture. He drove home, the radio off, thinking.