(no subject)
TGIF. It's been a pretty long week, but I think it's because my last weekend had playing commitments and felt more like workdays than weekend. I really need this weekend.
I'm sort of confused by how I should feel right now. I'm developing a bit of a crush on someone, which generally is a very happy thing for me. Problem is, it's a very unrealistic situation where even if he liked me back, it would never happen. Sometimes, I feel very lonely here. It's not the fact that I'm single. I don't mind being single...it makes me feel liberated and more able to meet new people. But the loneliness comes from the fact that there's nobody here that gives me butterflies in my stomach, you know? There are a couple people who I've connected with on a personal and physical level, but, the whole package just isn't there, I guess, because I haven't gotten to the point with anyone where they're all I think about day and night and all that sappy stuff. I sort of see them as good friends who I'm attracted to...which is strange. I thought that the personal and physical part was everything it took to make a crush or whatever, but I guess there's a third element...don't know what...that makes you feel vulnerable and anxious and gives you a reason to wake up in the morning. If I had that feeling, I think I would be more complete. I'm starting to have it now, but, as I said, it's an incredibly unrealistic situation, and my mind is constantly reminding me of that, which sucks. I guess I just don't see him often enough for it to be at the point where I have a reason to wake up in the morning.
Quote of the Day:
Erika: Why give it up right away? There's nothing to look forward to.
Eric: There's always anal!
Favorite Person:
Thomas who, for more than one night this week, I stayed up with WAY too late because he's someone to talk to who I relate to very well. Everyone might think he's a douchebag, but I get along with him pretty well.
I'm sort of confused by how I should feel right now. I'm developing a bit of a crush on someone, which generally is a very happy thing for me. Problem is, it's a very unrealistic situation where even if he liked me back, it would never happen. Sometimes, I feel very lonely here. It's not the fact that I'm single. I don't mind being single...it makes me feel liberated and more able to meet new people. But the loneliness comes from the fact that there's nobody here that gives me butterflies in my stomach, you know? There are a couple people who I've connected with on a personal and physical level, but, the whole package just isn't there, I guess, because I haven't gotten to the point with anyone where they're all I think about day and night and all that sappy stuff. I sort of see them as good friends who I'm attracted to...which is strange. I thought that the personal and physical part was everything it took to make a crush or whatever, but I guess there's a third element...don't know what...that makes you feel vulnerable and anxious and gives you a reason to wake up in the morning. If I had that feeling, I think I would be more complete. I'm starting to have it now, but, as I said, it's an incredibly unrealistic situation, and my mind is constantly reminding me of that, which sucks. I guess I just don't see him often enough for it to be at the point where I have a reason to wake up in the morning.
Quote of the Day:
Erika: Why give it up right away? There's nothing to look forward to.
Eric: There's always anal!
Favorite Person:
Thomas who, for more than one night this week, I stayed up with WAY too late because he's someone to talk to who I relate to very well. Everyone might think he's a douchebag, but I get along with him pretty well.