59 days! Gah!!!!
T minus 59 days until Youmacon, which now gives me just under two months to rip out my hair working on cosplay stuff. Still got around 19 pounds to lose, but I feel things toning up, so I'm beginning to think I am getting some muscle weight, which is fine. But I still have quite a few inches I'd like to be able to take off my waist before the convention. If I can lose two more inches off my waist, I'll be super happy. But I gotta start disciplining myself harder. Like this whole week, we've been eating pizza, because we had a midnight release for Madden and had a ton of it left. It's quick and easy to throw in the microwave, so we've just finished that up. Granted I've hardly had a day this week where I went over on calories, I know a pizza diet is not the best choice for me with calories. I'm bouncing between 244.4 and 245.2 at this point, so I really want to see that scale start moving again.
After a little bit more research into thermogenics, I decided that it would be worth giving Oxy Elite Pro a try. It's still cheaper than D4, and has gotten nearly as many good reviews as it. I started the pills yesterday, so I'm working on building up to the normal dose of three pills max a day. I'm probably going to stick with taking two a day up until Youma, and see how it works for me. I've read a few reports that people feel serious jitters on this stuff. I haven't felt any yet. It was the hydroxycut that made me jittery. I still dropped two pounds on it in the two weeks the bottle lasted me. I have approximately one month of being able to go outside for biking, and I'd like to be able to make the most of it. If all goes well, I'll be able to go Monday, Tuesday, and Friday. As long as the weather doesn't throw me off. Maybe if I'm lucky, I'll be able to hit 240 in the next week and a half or so. Once I blast past a 10 pound barrier, I get motivated enough to continue pushing forward.
It's like, I'm happy about what I've accomplished so far, but I still feel like it's not enough. I know it's not, as I know I can get further. Especially as much as I've lost so far. Being able to take that envelope and push it a little bit further is exciting for me. Just knowing that one day in the future, I'll be below 200 pounds. I know I can never be an extra skinny girl, but I know my body can lose a lot more weight in order to be healthy. To know there may be one day I will no longer be deemed plus sized. Those thoughts make me push further ahead every day.
I have an extremely supportive group of friends. Some of them I might not see often, but they are the ones I keep in touch with online as much as I can. These are the people pushing me forward every day. It's not just about me doing this for myself. I've looked at it so far as a journey that has inspired some of the people I know to start trying to lose weight. People have come to me and asked me for hints and tips on what I am doing. Barring taking the thermogenics, which I only recently started taking again after quitting them in December, everything is being done by diet and exercise alone. The Oxy Elite is just that extra boost I'm needing to get my metabolism to stabilize and keep itself up. I've never been one with a quick metabolism, and I often joke that I gain weight just by looking at food the wrong way. Sometimes I truly believe that.
But all the diets I've ever tried have always been so restrictive. This is the first one that's really allowed me to eat whatever I want, and long as I'm being mindful of calories and portions. I have in no way felt that I've deprived myself of eating the foods I want.
I'm finally starting to come out of my shell again and socialize a little bit more with people. I realized by not hanging out with people a lot in college, I got really socially awkward, and I often feel uncomfortable around people. Actually going out and hanging out with friends is helping me out greatly. Yesterday I had a good chunk of the day off work, so Stephen and I hung out with Nara and Marly. I've never really met Nara outside of costume before, but ran into her at Borders the week before. We talked for a couple minutes, but that was it. We finally managed to find the time to get the four of us together to hang out. It was a lot of fun. We hung out while they were working on cosplay props, then went out to dinner. I think seeing the stuff being worked on is enough motivation to get me started on my stuff tonight and see what I can accomplish this week. I still need to order the pattern for Keine, along with the petticoat. Maybe this paycheck, maybe the next one.
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