did you ever read it?

i guess i won't get to ask you now. i wish i would have. house of leaves. i just got my copy two days ago, christmas eve. i'd heard about it before, of course. read interviews and excerpts and talked to folks who were obsessed with it from the first edition ten years ago. ten years ago, i didn't know you, didn't know anything ( Read more... )

Today is my birthday, and between the finals and the essays and the meetings with academic advisers, all I can think about is you. What you'd say when I told you and how you'd have some cryptic take on the subject of aging and how you'd understand what I mean when I say I've always felt old. And when I mention how much it sucked to walk to ( Read more... )

i have been told that there are two ways to respond to fear:

to run from it

or to be fascinated by it.

i am noticing a pattern to my behavior.

searching for the unsettling.

the frightening.

the mad.

i don't know what this means.

. . .

do i have a death wish?