You Realize That Life Goes Fast

[raven_smiles]

Things are so chaotic right now. My mom is going downhill fast; faster than we thought she would. I'm trying to rearrange my schedule so I can go there after work just to visit for a few minutes. I went to the gym first thing this morning, and I hated it. I despise waking up before 7, even if it's just to go to the gym. I'm contemplating

Comments

[raven_smiles]

Eh, I wouldn't say I'm functioning. I'm certainly holding up better than my father, but I think that's partly because it's my mom and not the person I'm spending the rest of my life with and partly because I'm not at the house all the time to see what's going on. Each day is so different, and she's gotten a lot worse since Thursday, so I'm just now starting to rearrange my schedule. Before that I was living with "she's sick but holding up well." Now it's "she's sick and not holding up at all."

I have random break-downs at really different points during the day. Sunday's second reading killed me, "Hope does not disappoint." And then I started crying during Fr. Steve's homily, and he wasn't even saying anything that could be slightly related to what's going on. Just talking about the woman with five husbands. The people around me must've thought I was an emotional basket-case!

As to school, we'll see what I do. As I told Martin, in one sense, it's nice to have something to do, to distract you. There's not a lot to do at the house if my mom's sleeping, and she's been sleeping a lot lately. They really drug her up when they take her to the hospital, so I suspect that she's just going to be sleeping all week. In that sense, there's no real need for me to drop my class and be at home. However, my dad could probably use someone to relieve him at home. So yeah...a lot of it is just coordination of schedules. Thank goodness the kids are old enough to mostly take care of themselves. That's so helpful.