Embrace the Cross
I think everyone agrees that it's hard to know what to say to people that are clearly suffering, especially when it seems that there's no hope that the suffering is going to end. Hearing my parents talk about my mom's illness is rough, especially cause there's not a whole lot I can say to make it better.
The cancer is spreading pretty rapidly through her body. It's moved into her bones and her back, and fractured her spine, which is why her back was hurting. They didn't say this, but it's kind of implied that it's only a matter of time before it spreads to the rest of the body. The doctor increased her narcotics dosage to try to ease her back pain. She had trouble breathing Monday, which really freaked her out. Because of that and the increased dose of narcotics she's not allowed to drive anymore. The thought of my mom not driving is laughable. I know she loves it as much as I do, but how she can function without driving is beyond me. I mean, I know that she'll have to rely on other people to get everything done, but it's still crazy. She stayed home from work yesterday to figure out what kind of help she's going to need in the future. Meals, laundry, cleaning, rides for the kids, grocery shopping. All of it has to be handled by other people now. I think I've mentioned before that I get a bit of my stubborness from my mom. We like to do things ourselves because we know "the right way" to do them. We also don't want to impose on people or put them out in any way. So this is obviously hard.
We're just trying to take one day at a time. WSF suggested that my dad take my mom on a trip, which is a good idea. I'm going to suggest that we move our family vacation up a bit and take a family trip. We have our normal one scheduled for July, and if we're lucky we can take two trips, but it may be wise to take a trip now.
It's been really neat to read the letters from my parents friends. People who knew my parents before they started dating; people who watched them date, get married, and have children; people who lived with my family; people who say they try to emulate my parents; people who remember my mom for her smile, her musical gifts, her cooking, and her cleaning; people who remember my dad for being on fire for Christ, for teaching others how to use various tools and electronics, for caring and thinking of others; people who see my parents as having an "open" marriage...open in the sense that others could look at it and see that yes, indeed, they are living out their vocation. I can only hope that my marriage is half as successful as theirs. That I am always aware of my vocation and my call as a wife and (hopefully) mother. That if I'm lucky enough to bring a child into the world I remember (as my parents did when they brought me home) that I'm responsible for their soul. What a huge undertaking! So challenging! But so rich and full of graces.
The cancer is spreading pretty rapidly through her body. It's moved into her bones and her back, and fractured her spine, which is why her back was hurting. They didn't say this, but it's kind of implied that it's only a matter of time before it spreads to the rest of the body. The doctor increased her narcotics dosage to try to ease her back pain. She had trouble breathing Monday, which really freaked her out. Because of that and the increased dose of narcotics she's not allowed to drive anymore. The thought of my mom not driving is laughable. I know she loves it as much as I do, but how she can function without driving is beyond me. I mean, I know that she'll have to rely on other people to get everything done, but it's still crazy. She stayed home from work yesterday to figure out what kind of help she's going to need in the future. Meals, laundry, cleaning, rides for the kids, grocery shopping. All of it has to be handled by other people now. I think I've mentioned before that I get a bit of my stubborness from my mom. We like to do things ourselves because we know "the right way" to do them. We also don't want to impose on people or put them out in any way. So this is obviously hard.
We're just trying to take one day at a time. WSF suggested that my dad take my mom on a trip, which is a good idea. I'm going to suggest that we move our family vacation up a bit and take a family trip. We have our normal one scheduled for July, and if we're lucky we can take two trips, but it may be wise to take a trip now.
It's been really neat to read the letters from my parents friends. People who knew my parents before they started dating; people who watched them date, get married, and have children; people who lived with my family; people who say they try to emulate my parents; people who remember my mom for her smile, her musical gifts, her cooking, and her cleaning; people who remember my dad for being on fire for Christ, for teaching others how to use various tools and electronics, for caring and thinking of others; people who see my parents as having an "open" marriage...open in the sense that others could look at it and see that yes, indeed, they are living out their vocation. I can only hope that my marriage is half as successful as theirs. That I am always aware of my vocation and my call as a wife and (hopefully) mother. That if I'm lucky enough to bring a child into the world I remember (as my parents did when they brought me home) that I'm responsible for their soul. What a huge undertaking! So challenging! But so rich and full of graces.