summer sucks
Guess I'll write something. I am, of course, spending another summer discovering how vitally important it is that I find an alternative to corporate slavery. This year, it's Toys 'R Us tyme. I guess it's no worse than other jobs I've had, but even so... It's so asinine I can't handle it. Even worse, it's minimum wage(which, to be fair, is 7 bucks an hour in VT), and not even full time. Yet, somehow they manage to make me work 5 days a week, and still only get paid for 20-25 hours. If you're making me come get in uniform and deal with your shit, you've already ruined my entire day... can I please have 8 hours of pay instead of 4?
This serves to fill me with unfathomable anxiety about grad school. If I fuck it up, I sure do have to go get a job. Don't get me wrong: I harbor no delusions that being a professor will mean never having to deal with stupid bullshit... but at least it'll be stupid bullshit that I can, in some way, care about. I like philosophy. I'd like nothing better to spend my days talking about it with a bunch of 20 year old kids, even if that means having to deal with the department chair, the dean of the school, and all the other bullshit that comes with it. I don't give a flying fuck about buyer protection plans, geoffrey's birthday club, presells, how the store performs against the regional average, or how many goddamned batteries we sell. Since I don't care about anything related to my work, I damn sure don't care about Captain Bullshit droning on endlessly about how I should sign up 15 kids for the birthday club every day, or Admiral Bullshit's morning meeting about the day's projected profits.
In case you're curious, our store does about $25,000 in business a day. Things are marked up from between 50 to 300% of our cost, so being conservative let's say $10,000 of that is the store's.
I'm sure the place has bills, so let's go completely batshit crazy and say that $5000(per day, remember) of that goes to property expenses: equipment repair, HVAC, lights, rent or property taxes...
So that's 5000 left for profits and employee pay. 6-12 employees are there anytime we're open, and we're open for about 12 hours a day. Let's say(falsely), that 12 employees are there, for about 144 paid worker hours each day. I'm estimating that the average pay is about 12 dollars an hour(from my 7 to the store manager's 30 or 40 or whatever).
12 times 144 = $1728, leaving over 3000 dollars daily in store profits for the corporate masters, along with a like figure from all their stores, everywhere. It's not even the holiday season. Now remember how I've estimated at every turn so as to minimize this final figure. The moral of the story kids, is: be born rich and buy lots of stock. Then hire unionbusters.
Next time you hear a politician say economic stimulus, he means that the shareholders are crying poverty.
Anyway. I like Heidi, ice cream, puppies, kitties, and children who don't cry and who aren't ugly. IM me sometime. Heidi works more than I do, and I'm bored a lot.
This serves to fill me with unfathomable anxiety about grad school. If I fuck it up, I sure do have to go get a job. Don't get me wrong: I harbor no delusions that being a professor will mean never having to deal with stupid bullshit... but at least it'll be stupid bullshit that I can, in some way, care about. I like philosophy. I'd like nothing better to spend my days talking about it with a bunch of 20 year old kids, even if that means having to deal with the department chair, the dean of the school, and all the other bullshit that comes with it. I don't give a flying fuck about buyer protection plans, geoffrey's birthday club, presells, how the store performs against the regional average, or how many goddamned batteries we sell. Since I don't care about anything related to my work, I damn sure don't care about Captain Bullshit droning on endlessly about how I should sign up 15 kids for the birthday club every day, or Admiral Bullshit's morning meeting about the day's projected profits.
In case you're curious, our store does about $25,000 in business a day. Things are marked up from between 50 to 300% of our cost, so being conservative let's say $10,000 of that is the store's.
I'm sure the place has bills, so let's go completely batshit crazy and say that $5000(per day, remember) of that goes to property expenses: equipment repair, HVAC, lights, rent or property taxes...
So that's 5000 left for profits and employee pay. 6-12 employees are there anytime we're open, and we're open for about 12 hours a day. Let's say(falsely), that 12 employees are there, for about 144 paid worker hours each day. I'm estimating that the average pay is about 12 dollars an hour(from my 7 to the store manager's 30 or 40 or whatever).
12 times 144 = $1728, leaving over 3000 dollars daily in store profits for the corporate masters, along with a like figure from all their stores, everywhere. It's not even the holiday season. Now remember how I've estimated at every turn so as to minimize this final figure. The moral of the story kids, is: be born rich and buy lots of stock. Then hire unionbusters.
Next time you hear a politician say economic stimulus, he means that the shareholders are crying poverty.
Anyway. I like Heidi, ice cream, puppies, kitties, and children who don't cry and who aren't ugly. IM me sometime. Heidi works more than I do, and I'm bored a lot.