Starting over for the nine millionth time
So, I think it's pretty dumb that I have to reset this stupid thing every time I go to post. RICH TEXT already! Don't they know that yet? Meh. Anywho... It's two AM and I'm mega tired. Today/Yesterday has been a hell of a day. I had a great rush at dinner, working at Papa John's. My good buddy josh brought me food from his mom's house. It was pretty neat. Then, my mum and brother called me while I was working. I totally ignored being a manager just to talk to them. It was so cool. I was really excited. Then, my great brother invited me to come live with him in AZ. Now, that was the greatest part. I totally adore my brother. He is the only person who knows how to make me smile even when I am so sad, I don't think I know how to smile. Anyway, I am pretty excited about that, all in all.
Now onto the reasons I want to leave: I think we can all agree that I have been really sad and lonely these past couple of months. Sure, my new friends are good for me, and have been able to make me feel temporarily better. However, just feeling better for the moment isn't worth it anymore. I hate knowing that as soon as I walk out of the room with you guys, I am alone again. I hate feeling like as soon as I'm away, I am going to be miserable again. And, I hate being afraid of being alone. It's not good, and I know that.
There are a lot of people here to whom I have become very attached. I have Ryan, of course, whom I will always care about. And there is Hank, who has become a very great friend to me, and whom I will miss. (Don't forget our Maine trip!) There is Josh... I wish I could take him with me. :-) I'm gonna miss him a lot. All of.. or most of my employees... *sighs* No words.
So, basically, I am hoping things will get better. :-( If all goes as planned, I will be complete and happy. I will have my friends and my Stephi and my family, and my Sammi, and my Jason and my Austin again. I hope things will be okay. I am hoping this is my chance at happiness. I am scared, but I know things will get better. :-) Everyone always tells me that, anyway.