Things seem to be a bit better lately. Not perfect by any means, but better. Last night we had a babysitter for the first time since moving down here, and we were able to go to dinner and have quiet time. It wasn't anything too special, but it was just the two of us...no pressure, no definite plans, it was nice ( Read more... )

I'm sure that when I'm siting here next to him on the couch, and he's telling his sister that he will be visiting "home" in September ALONE, I shouldn't read too much into that. Nevermind the conversation we had just this afternoon while looking at flight costs, that when I mentioned him going home without me he defiantly said "I meant going with ( Read more... )

It's Friday!! The weekend will say a lot about the state of my relationship with Chris. We have had a better couple of evenings, especially yesterday, but with lots of time together on the weekends the true feelings tend to come out. Will they be good feelings or bad? I don't know, i'm sure a lot depends on me ( Read more... )

For so long I kept a journal so that I could vent, but also so that those close to me could get a glimpse into the things I was thinking and feeling. It was a nice outlet, and one I haven't used in quite awhile. I occasionally post a blog on myspace, but I find myself editing my thoughts and feelings pretty often because of the people who have ( Read more... )

Four years ago, I totalled my car in an accident in which a white ford truck turned in front of me and we collided at 50+ mph. One year ago, A white ford truck barrelled through my bedroom, causing much trauma and requiring an immediate move, all while six months pregnant. Today, a white ford truck ran a red light and t-boned Amanda's car on the ( Read more... )

At what point do you walk away and say enough is enough? How many nights of tears, or fighting, or silence? When do you stop questioning whether it's you, that you are being irrational, or overreacting, or that your hormones are crazy or you are depressed? When do you stop lying to family, or friends, or yourself about how things are going? When do ( Read more... )

I remember having such an attitude with the guy next door a few years back when he would knock and ask us to turn the music down, especially on the weekends. Like, who did he think he was? Old, cranky man! So when did I turn into the cranky woman who wants to kill the butthead upstairs whose video game is so loud on his sound system that I hear ( Read more... )

It's been quite some time since I wrote an entry. I'm sure my son will be up from naptime in twenty minutes or less, but I felt compelled to write ( Read more... )

My baby boy said his first word tonight. The word I have been prompting and pleading with him to say for months. The first time he said it, I felt it was a fluke. I asked him to say it again, and sure enough, he obliged. I took him into the living room, and prompted him to repeat it once more for daddy, and the two syllables poured from his ( Read more... )

"How had he come to miss the girl that he had purposely kept at a distance so that he would not miss her when she was gone?"

Not exact, but close, said by Steve Martin in Shopgirl.