HELP
Okay, okay... I officially need help. I have no idea what I am doing with the whole Osmani situation... basically, I dunno what to do with boys in general... I dunno what is normal, what isn't, what I'm supposed to be doing. I really just have no clue what's going on and what I'm supposed to do about it. I am SO freaked out about fucking this thing up with Os for myself (like, if something doesn't happen... I'm afraid that it will be MY fault, and not just that it didn't work out). But I don't know what to do!!!
So, I haven't really talked to or seen him much since the night he called me. Like, a couple of minutes here and there... but even today when I could have talked to him more, we didn't. I dunno if I'm making it awkward or something... whatever. But he hasn't called since (okay, Christmas was in there... so that's understandable to a certain extent). But I have no idea what stage we are even at... like how many times he SHOULD be calling and all that. I just feel like it's fizzling... I dunno if that's my imagination or not.
Also, PS I do keep forgetting that it hasn't been THAT many days since he last called (etc. etc.) and that this is the point in which one day seems like it's about 2 weeks and so it really feels like forever. Also, I feel like I'm at the point where every little thing is very critical, or so it seems. Blah, I still keep going back to how I don't understand how someone could call you and sing a song like that to you that's basically like "hey, I like you" and then not call you or really talk to you for a lil while. I just wish everything could be super straight forward, ya know? I hate "the game".
Anyway...
I feel like I haven't been doing enough to show that I like him. I mean, he really took the cookie thing to heart, which I wasn't expecting. And then I did call him after he had left me that message saying how I felt like an asshole because it's hard for me to express my emotions and I didn't feel like I had shown him how much I appreciated what he did. But, I mean, he did this amazing thing for me, and I still feel like I acted like it was nothing. Even with the message I left him and even having talked to him personally about it... I still feel like I didn't react well enough. But I dunno what more to do!!! This is where the help comes in... major help! Is there something I should be doing? Is there some kind of really big gesture I could do to let him know? I obviously can't call him and sing him a song, because it's been done. But without just outright being like "I really like you" (which I'm positive it's just gonna turn into anyway... especially if he goes out with us one night and I am drunk), I just dunno what else I can do to show him. It's hard because I don't wanna badger him by calling him all the time. And it's really really hard at work because we have to be professional and I don't get much time with him. See, I just dunno what to do!!!!!! I need someone with some more boy experience to lend me a big ol' hand with this one. He's a really great guy and very much what I have been looking for... and I feel like he's interested too, but I just don't know what the hell to do.
So, please... HEEEEELP!!!
Blah, I also feel like Dario (my coworker, his pal) needs to know that I like him because that would (obviously) be a great way to get Os the message... while also possibly squeezing some info out of Dario (if he knows any). But I feel really uncomfortable going up to Dario and being like "hey, I like your buddy". Sarah said she would say something to him, but she hasn't. She or Liz or somebody needs to say something, but I dunno that they will. I just feel like not all the right people know... some good ones know, but all they do is talk to me about it and I need some go-between action (since I am a lame ass). Blaaaaaah I just don't know!!!!!
help. me.
So, I haven't really talked to or seen him much since the night he called me. Like, a couple of minutes here and there... but even today when I could have talked to him more, we didn't. I dunno if I'm making it awkward or something... whatever. But he hasn't called since (okay, Christmas was in there... so that's understandable to a certain extent). But I have no idea what stage we are even at... like how many times he SHOULD be calling and all that. I just feel like it's fizzling... I dunno if that's my imagination or not.
Also, PS I do keep forgetting that it hasn't been THAT many days since he last called (etc. etc.) and that this is the point in which one day seems like it's about 2 weeks and so it really feels like forever. Also, I feel like I'm at the point where every little thing is very critical, or so it seems. Blah, I still keep going back to how I don't understand how someone could call you and sing a song like that to you that's basically like "hey, I like you" and then not call you or really talk to you for a lil while. I just wish everything could be super straight forward, ya know? I hate "the game".
Anyway...
I feel like I haven't been doing enough to show that I like him. I mean, he really took the cookie thing to heart, which I wasn't expecting. And then I did call him after he had left me that message saying how I felt like an asshole because it's hard for me to express my emotions and I didn't feel like I had shown him how much I appreciated what he did. But, I mean, he did this amazing thing for me, and I still feel like I acted like it was nothing. Even with the message I left him and even having talked to him personally about it... I still feel like I didn't react well enough. But I dunno what more to do!!! This is where the help comes in... major help! Is there something I should be doing? Is there some kind of really big gesture I could do to let him know? I obviously can't call him and sing him a song, because it's been done. But without just outright being like "I really like you" (which I'm positive it's just gonna turn into anyway... especially if he goes out with us one night and I am drunk), I just dunno what else I can do to show him. It's hard because I don't wanna badger him by calling him all the time. And it's really really hard at work because we have to be professional and I don't get much time with him. See, I just dunno what to do!!!!!! I need someone with some more boy experience to lend me a big ol' hand with this one. He's a really great guy and very much what I have been looking for... and I feel like he's interested too, but I just don't know what the hell to do.
So, please... HEEEEELP!!!
Blah, I also feel like Dario (my coworker, his pal) needs to know that I like him because that would (obviously) be a great way to get Os the message... while also possibly squeezing some info out of Dario (if he knows any). But I feel really uncomfortable going up to Dario and being like "hey, I like your buddy". Sarah said she would say something to him, but she hasn't. She or Liz or somebody needs to say something, but I dunno that they will. I just feel like not all the right people know... some good ones know, but all they do is talk to me about it and I need some go-between action (since I am a lame ass). Blaaaaaah I just don't know!!!!!
help. me.