my weekend discoveries...
well i went to socorro last weekend.
one piece of bad news that i found is that my aunt---my papa's sister---only had two months to live. she has brain cancer. but it has already spread all over her body that there is nothing that any doctor can do for her....
another discovery i found out was that at this particular time in my life i just feel much better at home. i do not feel so depressed or lonely. i just am happy sort of. the things that bring me down over there is seeing how my grandparents are being. my grandma cant even walk anymore. that is the main thing going on with her. my grandpa is getting worse and worse. it is like i can see it on his face. he is getting so skinny. he weighs in only at 108 pounds. his heart was hurting this past weekend. his foot is getting bad. he has ulcers in it or something like that. he can lose his leg if this operation that he needs does not work. it looks like his diabetes is deteriotating him. seeing him and the way he is makes me wish i never develop it. it is a horrible disease and it will eat at you as i have discovered.
but there is some good news to my life right now.
i met someone. something that i was not expecting especially b/c it is really soon in my life. but this feels like something that i cannot ignore. me and him get along so well. we just talk when we see each other. i was with him all weekend and we just talked. there was some kissing but the majority was talking. we talk on the phone for hours. we never run out of words to say. ever. we were at dennys for like four hours and then the park the next night for like three hours. and we just talked. it is crazy. i have had other boyfriends before and stuff and yes we would have deep conservations. but never like this. i am not sure on how to feel or think. i am not even sure on how to describe. me and him just get along and i know he feels the same way. we have talked about it. i even met him at a bar. something that i never wanted to do. but we did. but it turns out just like me it was pretty random that we were both even there in the first place.. it was a crazy experience but awesome. i guess i will see what develops but i cant help but feel happy about this. i can tell him anything and i have. i just feel like i can talk to him. and one things i really love is that he did not judge me when he saw the cuts on my hand. i have talked to other people and once they see them thye always judge me. he did not judge one bit. and right then i can see there was something special in him. but i do talk to him about a lot of stuff. some funny, some serious, some not so serious conversations. we just talk....
one piece of bad news that i found is that my aunt---my papa's sister---only had two months to live. she has brain cancer. but it has already spread all over her body that there is nothing that any doctor can do for her....
another discovery i found out was that at this particular time in my life i just feel much better at home. i do not feel so depressed or lonely. i just am happy sort of. the things that bring me down over there is seeing how my grandparents are being. my grandma cant even walk anymore. that is the main thing going on with her. my grandpa is getting worse and worse. it is like i can see it on his face. he is getting so skinny. he weighs in only at 108 pounds. his heart was hurting this past weekend. his foot is getting bad. he has ulcers in it or something like that. he can lose his leg if this operation that he needs does not work. it looks like his diabetes is deteriotating him. seeing him and the way he is makes me wish i never develop it. it is a horrible disease and it will eat at you as i have discovered.
but there is some good news to my life right now.
i met someone. something that i was not expecting especially b/c it is really soon in my life. but this feels like something that i cannot ignore. me and him get along so well. we just talk when we see each other. i was with him all weekend and we just talked. there was some kissing but the majority was talking. we talk on the phone for hours. we never run out of words to say. ever. we were at dennys for like four hours and then the park the next night for like three hours. and we just talked. it is crazy. i have had other boyfriends before and stuff and yes we would have deep conservations. but never like this. i am not sure on how to feel or think. i am not even sure on how to describe. me and him just get along and i know he feels the same way. we have talked about it. i even met him at a bar. something that i never wanted to do. but we did. but it turns out just like me it was pretty random that we were both even there in the first place.. it was a crazy experience but awesome. i guess i will see what develops but i cant help but feel happy about this. i can tell him anything and i have. i just feel like i can talk to him. and one things i really love is that he did not judge me when he saw the cuts on my hand. i have talked to other people and once they see them thye always judge me. he did not judge one bit. and right then i can see there was something special in him. but i do talk to him about a lot of stuff. some funny, some serious, some not so serious conversations. we just talk....