0025: No Simplicity - Amy
Another super-short one. I'm guessing that this author is, at most, twelve.
TITLE: No Simplicity
PERPETRATOR: SilverRose12
SUE-O-METER: (how bad is it?)
WRITING:
SUEAGE:
WRONGNESS:
FULL NAME: Amy. Last name unknown.
SPECIES: Human/Witch
HAIR: not described
EYES: not described
MARKINGS: None mentioned
POSESSIONS: None mentioned
ORIGIN: Muggle-born, sorted into Gryffindor.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Beats up Draco for no good reason.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Able to beat up Draco. Makes friends with Harry, Ron, and Hermione after beating up Draco. Making Ron rant and rage and generally act like an idiot. Confusing the sorting hat all to blazes. For some reason being sorted after the feast.
NOTES: Gah... this is another fic written on super fast-forward, which is really starting to become one of my pet peeves. If you can't think of more than two lines of stuff that need to happen in a particular scene, then don't write it.
Our Sueoine knows absolutely nothing about the wizarding world, which is quite understandable if she's Muggle-born (something that is implied rather than stated). No problems there... the problem is Ron's spastic reaction to finding out that she doesn't know what Quidditch is. When Harry didn't know what Quidditch was, Ron cheerfully started to explain it to him. When this Amy doesn't know, Ron blows a gasket and shouts at her.
She confuses the sorting hat. She asks to borrow Harry's broom for no good reason... and she also beats up Draco. For no good reason beyond Harry, Ron, and Hermione having told her he's a jerk. I'd be willing to take someone's word for such a thing, but not to beat anyone up who hadn't done something to me personally.
And the Author's Notes are, as usual, sheer pain.
SAMPLE:
SilverRose12: Hi! It's me again!
Evil Authoress: Why are you so excited?
SilverRose12: This is my first Harry Potter story!
Evil Authoress: Whoop-de-do
SilverRose12: ^_^U
Evil Authoress: Hey, I have an idea.
SilverRose12: What?
Evil Authoress:*Snaps fingers, Harry appears*
Harry: Where am I? Oh no. I've heard of you. *Points at SilverRose12* You're the girl who's insane about me.
SilverRose12: Yep
Harry: I'll just run now.
SilverRose12: 5-minute head start.
Harry: *Runs away*
Evil Authoress: Heh heh heh.my trun.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters.
^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*
Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat on the train, speaking. Almost the entire train ride had passed, when the sliding door suddenly opened and a girl stepped in the compartment. "Mind if I sit here?"
"No," they all said as she sat down next to Harry." I'm Amy." As she said this, the train stopped, and everyone had to leave
^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*
The feast went by pretty quickly, and at the end of it, Amy was to be sorted. Everyone in the great hall looked at the her as she walked up to the stool and put the hat on her head. The hat thought for a long time before speaking.
'Hmm, you're almost as difficult to place as Harry Potter.'
'Who's Harry Potter?"
'You don't know who he is? Strange. Harry Potter is the one who defeated He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.'
'He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?'
'You don't know who he is either?'
'No.'
The hat went back to thinking. If it put her in Slytherin, then she might learn about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and Harry Potter and in the wrong perspective. But if it put her in Gryffindor.
"GRYFFINDOR!" The hat yelled.
Amy stood up and took off the hat. She looked around at the four long tables, noticing, in particular, the table with everyone beaming at her.
'Oh God, please don't let that be my house.'
While she was standing there, looking a bit confused, Dumbledore walked up to her and put a hand on her shoulder. She turned around instinctively.
"Need help finding your table?"
"Yes," she said as she nodded.
Dumbledore pointed to the table where everyone was smiling at her. She slapped her forehead as she strolled up to the table. Hermione (who happened to be sitting at the edge of the table, along with Harry and Ron) moved a bit over so she would have a place to sit.
"Thanks." She looked at Harry as she said, "Harry Potter?" Harry nodded. Amy continued, "Is there something important I'm supposed to know about you? The hat seemed to be surprised that I didn't know who you are."
"Harry defeated You-Know-Who when he was just a baby, and then-"
"Who is You-Know-Who?" The entire table stared at Amy.
"You don't know?" Hermione asked, surprised.
"No."
"Er, he was a very evil and powerful wizard who-"
"What was his name?"
Harry, Hermione and Ron all looked at each other. "We don't really.speak his name."
"Why not?"
"Well."
"His name was Voldemort," said Harry. Hermione and Ron looked at him.
"What's so scary about a name?"
"Er."
"It's just that.well."
"Whatever, back to what's so important about Harry Potter."
"When Voldemort came back in our first year of Hogwarts, and Ron and I, we went to save the sorcerer's stone from him, and Harry ended up fighting him alone, and he won. In our second year, the Chamber of Secrets was opened and Tom Riddle, who was 16-year-old You-Know-Who, was attacking Muggle-borns, and Harry defeated the Basilisk and and You-Know-Who, AGAIN, and in our third year, we found out that Ron's rat was You-Know-Who's servant and in our last year, You-Know-Who.he sort of.came back."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, he has a body now, and he's extremely more dangerous."
While they were talking, the feast ended, and everyone was instructed to go to their common rooms. Professor McGonagall walked up to Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Amy.
"Mr.Potter, Mr. Weasely, Ms. Granger, I see you've met our new student. Would you mind showing her around the school, telling about our rules and everything else?"
So they all agreed and stepped outside, since they decided to show her outside of the school first.
"This is the Forbidden Forest, this is the Quidditch field, and THIS is Hagrid's hut," Ron said as he pointed to everything.
"Who's Hagrid?" Amy asked.
"Hagrid is our friend," said Harry.
"Okay, so I understand the thing about the Forbidden Forest and Hagrid, but what in the seven hells is Quidditch?"
"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT QUIDDITCH IS?!" Ron asked, shocked.
"Not everyone has you vast intellect," Hermione said, as she laughed at Ron stupidity.
"Can you just tell me?!" screamed Amy in frustration.
"It's a sport, kind of like baseball," Harry answered.
"WHAT DO YOU LIVE IN, A DITCH?!" Ron asked, ignoring everything Harry and Hermione said.
"Harry, can I borrow your broom?" Amy asked cutely.
".Okay.but why do you need a broom if you don't know about Quidditch?" Harry asked.
"Oh, I need it for another reason," she said. "I'll show you a ditch," she said as she hit Ron on the head with the broom. She smiled happily and walked away with a smirk that could rival Draco Malfoy's.
Harry and Hermione follwed Amy while Ron just stood there, rubbing his head. She stopped walking and looked ahead as she spotted somebody. Malfoy.
"Who is that?"
Both Harry and Hermione frowned. "That's Malfoy. The biggest jerk in the school," said Hermione. Amy smirked some more. She walked up to Malfoy and said in a fake preppy voice,
"Like, can I kick your but?"
Malfoy stared at her. "No."
"That's too bad. See, I would, but I don't have a reason."
"Oh, I see, you're scared. I would get beat up by a girl."
Amy frowned. "Are you saying that just because I'm a female, I can't kick butt?"
"Yes."
Amy narrowed her eyes at him. "We'll see about that," she said as she pushed him, and he hit the outside wall of the castle. He tried to move, but found himself held in place by Amy's high-heeled shoe on her foot. He tried to move, but the shoe was very sharp.
"OUCH!"
"Girls can't kick butt, huh?" She removed her foot, and let him fall on the floor, the she kicked him and put her hands on her hips as she smirked again. By that time, Ron had managed to catch up to them.
"Hey, she beat up Malfoy! I like her!"
^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*
Evil Authoress: Anyways, like I was about to do, before this stupid STORY interrupted me.*Snaps fingers, Malfoy appears*
Malfoy: Oh hell
Evil Authoress: You got that right. *Glomps Malfoy*
Malfoy: *Sigh. * The ladies love me
Harry: *Returns from where he ran away to with SilverRose12 glomping him. *
SilverRose12: *Smacks Malfoy. * Not this lady.
Malfoy: Who said you're a lady?
SilverRose12: *Hits Malfoy on the head with a REAL bat. *
Malfoy: OUCH!
SilverRose12: DEAL WITH IT, WHINY!
Evil Authoress: Leave him alone.
SilverRose12: Whatever. By the way, people, any flames will be used to burn Cjo Chang.
Evil Authoress: YEAH! THAT HOE!
SilverRose12: ^_^U Please R&R people!
TITLE: No Simplicity
PERPETRATOR: SilverRose12
SUE-O-METER: (how bad is it?)
WRITING:
SUEAGE:
WRONGNESS:
FULL NAME: Amy. Last name unknown.
SPECIES: Human/Witch
HAIR: not described
EYES: not described
MARKINGS: None mentioned
POSESSIONS: None mentioned
ORIGIN: Muggle-born, sorted into Gryffindor.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Beats up Draco for no good reason.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Able to beat up Draco. Makes friends with Harry, Ron, and Hermione after beating up Draco. Making Ron rant and rage and generally act like an idiot. Confusing the sorting hat all to blazes. For some reason being sorted after the feast.
NOTES: Gah... this is another fic written on super fast-forward, which is really starting to become one of my pet peeves. If you can't think of more than two lines of stuff that need to happen in a particular scene, then don't write it.
Our Sueoine knows absolutely nothing about the wizarding world, which is quite understandable if she's Muggle-born (something that is implied rather than stated). No problems there... the problem is Ron's spastic reaction to finding out that she doesn't know what Quidditch is. When Harry didn't know what Quidditch was, Ron cheerfully started to explain it to him. When this Amy doesn't know, Ron blows a gasket and shouts at her.
She confuses the sorting hat. She asks to borrow Harry's broom for no good reason... and she also beats up Draco. For no good reason beyond Harry, Ron, and Hermione having told her he's a jerk. I'd be willing to take someone's word for such a thing, but not to beat anyone up who hadn't done something to me personally.
And the Author's Notes are, as usual, sheer pain.
SAMPLE:
SilverRose12: Hi! It's me again!
Evil Authoress: Why are you so excited?
SilverRose12: This is my first Harry Potter story!
Evil Authoress: Whoop-de-do
SilverRose12: ^_^U
Evil Authoress: Hey, I have an idea.
SilverRose12: What?
Evil Authoress:*Snaps fingers, Harry appears*
Harry: Where am I? Oh no. I've heard of you. *Points at SilverRose12* You're the girl who's insane about me.
SilverRose12: Yep
Harry: I'll just run now.
SilverRose12: 5-minute head start.
Harry: *Runs away*
Evil Authoress: Heh heh heh.my trun.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters.
^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*
Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat on the train, speaking. Almost the entire train ride had passed, when the sliding door suddenly opened and a girl stepped in the compartment. "Mind if I sit here?"
"No," they all said as she sat down next to Harry." I'm Amy." As she said this, the train stopped, and everyone had to leave
^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*
The feast went by pretty quickly, and at the end of it, Amy was to be sorted. Everyone in the great hall looked at the her as she walked up to the stool and put the hat on her head. The hat thought for a long time before speaking.
'Hmm, you're almost as difficult to place as Harry Potter.'
'Who's Harry Potter?"
'You don't know who he is? Strange. Harry Potter is the one who defeated He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.'
'He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?'
'You don't know who he is either?'
'No.'
The hat went back to thinking. If it put her in Slytherin, then she might learn about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and Harry Potter and in the wrong perspective. But if it put her in Gryffindor.
"GRYFFINDOR!" The hat yelled.
Amy stood up and took off the hat. She looked around at the four long tables, noticing, in particular, the table with everyone beaming at her.
'Oh God, please don't let that be my house.'
While she was standing there, looking a bit confused, Dumbledore walked up to her and put a hand on her shoulder. She turned around instinctively.
"Need help finding your table?"
"Yes," she said as she nodded.
Dumbledore pointed to the table where everyone was smiling at her. She slapped her forehead as she strolled up to the table. Hermione (who happened to be sitting at the edge of the table, along with Harry and Ron) moved a bit over so she would have a place to sit.
"Thanks." She looked at Harry as she said, "Harry Potter?" Harry nodded. Amy continued, "Is there something important I'm supposed to know about you? The hat seemed to be surprised that I didn't know who you are."
"Harry defeated You-Know-Who when he was just a baby, and then-"
"Who is You-Know-Who?" The entire table stared at Amy.
"You don't know?" Hermione asked, surprised.
"No."
"Er, he was a very evil and powerful wizard who-"
"What was his name?"
Harry, Hermione and Ron all looked at each other. "We don't really.speak his name."
"Why not?"
"Well."
"His name was Voldemort," said Harry. Hermione and Ron looked at him.
"What's so scary about a name?"
"Er."
"It's just that.well."
"Whatever, back to what's so important about Harry Potter."
"When Voldemort came back in our first year of Hogwarts, and Ron and I, we went to save the sorcerer's stone from him, and Harry ended up fighting him alone, and he won. In our second year, the Chamber of Secrets was opened and Tom Riddle, who was 16-year-old You-Know-Who, was attacking Muggle-borns, and Harry defeated the Basilisk and and You-Know-Who, AGAIN, and in our third year, we found out that Ron's rat was You-Know-Who's servant and in our last year, You-Know-Who.he sort of.came back."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, he has a body now, and he's extremely more dangerous."
While they were talking, the feast ended, and everyone was instructed to go to their common rooms. Professor McGonagall walked up to Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Amy.
"Mr.Potter, Mr. Weasely, Ms. Granger, I see you've met our new student. Would you mind showing her around the school, telling about our rules and everything else?"
So they all agreed and stepped outside, since they decided to show her outside of the school first.
"This is the Forbidden Forest, this is the Quidditch field, and THIS is Hagrid's hut," Ron said as he pointed to everything.
"Who's Hagrid?" Amy asked.
"Hagrid is our friend," said Harry.
"Okay, so I understand the thing about the Forbidden Forest and Hagrid, but what in the seven hells is Quidditch?"
"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT QUIDDITCH IS?!" Ron asked, shocked.
"Not everyone has you vast intellect," Hermione said, as she laughed at Ron stupidity.
"Can you just tell me?!" screamed Amy in frustration.
"It's a sport, kind of like baseball," Harry answered.
"WHAT DO YOU LIVE IN, A DITCH?!" Ron asked, ignoring everything Harry and Hermione said.
"Harry, can I borrow your broom?" Amy asked cutely.
".Okay.but why do you need a broom if you don't know about Quidditch?" Harry asked.
"Oh, I need it for another reason," she said. "I'll show you a ditch," she said as she hit Ron on the head with the broom. She smiled happily and walked away with a smirk that could rival Draco Malfoy's.
Harry and Hermione follwed Amy while Ron just stood there, rubbing his head. She stopped walking and looked ahead as she spotted somebody. Malfoy.
"Who is that?"
Both Harry and Hermione frowned. "That's Malfoy. The biggest jerk in the school," said Hermione. Amy smirked some more. She walked up to Malfoy and said in a fake preppy voice,
"Like, can I kick your but?"
Malfoy stared at her. "No."
"That's too bad. See, I would, but I don't have a reason."
"Oh, I see, you're scared. I would get beat up by a girl."
Amy frowned. "Are you saying that just because I'm a female, I can't kick butt?"
"Yes."
Amy narrowed her eyes at him. "We'll see about that," she said as she pushed him, and he hit the outside wall of the castle. He tried to move, but found himself held in place by Amy's high-heeled shoe on her foot. He tried to move, but the shoe was very sharp.
"OUCH!"
"Girls can't kick butt, huh?" She removed her foot, and let him fall on the floor, the she kicked him and put her hands on her hips as she smirked again. By that time, Ron had managed to catch up to them.
"Hey, she beat up Malfoy! I like her!"
^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~* ^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*^~*
Evil Authoress: Anyways, like I was about to do, before this stupid STORY interrupted me.*Snaps fingers, Malfoy appears*
Malfoy: Oh hell
Evil Authoress: You got that right. *Glomps Malfoy*
Malfoy: *Sigh. * The ladies love me
Harry: *Returns from where he ran away to with SilverRose12 glomping him. *
SilverRose12: *Smacks Malfoy. * Not this lady.
Malfoy: Who said you're a lady?
SilverRose12: *Hits Malfoy on the head with a REAL bat. *
Malfoy: OUCH!
SilverRose12: DEAL WITH IT, WHINY!
Evil Authoress: Leave him alone.
SilverRose12: Whatever. By the way, people, any flames will be used to burn Cjo Chang.
Evil Authoress: YEAH! THAT HOE!
SilverRose12: ^_^U Please R&R people!