5014:
Title: An American Angel in Hogwarts
Perpetrator: Cynder2013
Sue-O-Meter: Toxic
Cover/Banner Art: The writer’s avatar looks like a bunch of plant leaves frosted over.
Summary: “Demons aren't the only danger to Midnight. When Hermione Granger goes looking for her sister, who went missing five years before, tracking her to Midnight, Texas can only bring trouble to the town, and the two fallen angels who make their home there. The Midnighters are a family, and they won't let anyone take one of their own. AU.”
Full Name: Heather/Paulina Granger
Species: We’ve an American Sue. I think. Technically she’s from the same place as Hermione. She’s Hermione’s siter yet the daughter of Anne. Joe and Chuy from the other canon are conveniently her new dads. She’s apparently a half angel.
Hair: I’m guessing she’s got blond hair.
Eyes: I didn't catch onto this.
Markings: I'm hoping the character doesn't have angel wings.
Possessions: The abilty to run away despite being a minor.
Connection to Canon: The prologue starts off with actually telling us why Hermione’s sister is missing yet leaves us wondering how she got to America, just like many other American Sues. That’s how she ends up in the Midnight Texas Series. The actual first chapter opens up with Hermione making a potion to find her sister only, “it was embarrassing how long it had taken for her to make this potion. Three years with access to the largest library of magic in Britain and she hadn’t found the recipe until second year, when she took out Moste Potente Potions for the Polyjuice reciepe. Then the whole getting petrified by a giant snake had happened, and she couldn’t do the magic required out in the muggle world, so she was only getting around to making it now.” Sue is making a potion in Midnight at the same time. I’m guessing the Sue’s name is Heather. Some teens are outside vandalizing the “Antique Gallery and Nail Salon” because it is a soft target. By this the writer means they won’t get cursed or shot with silver bullets. She threatens to break some of their kneecaps. (…) Really? I get wanting to have a tough character, but this one doesn’t feel realistic. Chapter three (actually two because of the prologue) is more of Heather running around Midnight. The actual chapter three is about how she’s got special powers and they’re such a pain for her, but mostly nothing much happens. Chapter five jumps back to Hermione and her bagging out on visiting Hagrid. Apparently looking up books regarding stuff in America until “finally, Hermione found a town in Texas where two ley lines crossed and provided a minor boost to magical power.” It then switches back to Heather at a barbeque. This make her uncomfortable because of her psychic abilities! The forth chapter ends with them becoming main psychic in Midnight because Heather is so much better and sensitive with her powers than the male canon character. She’s then not allowed to leave town without permission in the next chapter and she complains about going to school. Bobo is apparently getting arrested for Aubrey’s death just like the beginning of the show because the murder weapon belongs to him. She wants to help with the situation. (You know, this is the girl who ran away across the ocean? It may be five years later, but how much help is she going to be? I guess a lot because she’s a Sue.) She wines afterwards that going to school is useless in chapter six. Someone calls her out for the fact she should be in school. (This makes me suspect she’s eighteen or under which means she’s thirteen or under when she ran away.) Chapter seven has Heather note she needs to practice using her light. Chapter eight we learn that “Joe and Chuy corrected her, saying her Light wasn’t just ‘some pretty light’ but an extension of her soul…” Using her light power has the repercussions of turning off her psychic powers and she falls out of bed in chapter nine when they return. Eventually this causes her to pass out and someone says “everyone calm down, you’re hurting Heather.” Gag. In other words this Sue is super powerful yet super weak at the same time, but only so the canon characters of the other fandom can walk on tip toes around her. They’re worried because Lem is twitchy. Something is causing everyone to come to Midnight as well. Chapter ten (eleven if you count the prologue) we learn “a succubus had killed two men just outside of Midnight.” Honestly, this story is painful due to the fact there is no real direction beyond following the books. Anyways, I’ve gotten to chapter thirteen as I’m not wanting to go into detail regarding stuff which can be found online for the other fandom. We finally see Hermione again and Ron is praising her for creating her potion to find her sister. Hermione is thinking, “it would be fascinating to learn about the Muggle perspective on magic” because “Professor Burbage won’t be teaching it until after Easter.” This is coming from someone who is Muggle Born for rying out loud. That’s when she arrives in Midnight after TWELVE chapters and a PROLOGUE! Said chapter ends with a wizard suddenly showing up and saying, “you are under arrest for illegally entering America and breaking the International Statute of Secrecy!” Hermione’s too intelligent for the first, but the way I see the Midnight canon the place isn’t a “Muggle” place.
Origin: For some reason Hermione Granger has a missing sister who somehow ends up in America. Second chapter instantly makes me wonder how old Hermione’s sister is when she ran away. Apparently Midnight, Texas is “four thousand six hundred eight miles and six time zones away.” Did you know it is 4,753 miles from London to Dallas and Dallas is actually one of the closest cities to London. Regarding the fifth chapter, “the last bit of this chapter played out like it did in the TV show. Most of the dialogue after the arrive from the plice car is from the show. However, I would like to remind people that I’m using the books a lot so not everything will be the same as the show.” So, when the writer’s not plagiarizing the show they’re plagiarizing the books? Actually, I don’t know how much the writer is copying in this one and if only the scene aforementioned is plagiarized. The writer admits to this in their own words.
Special Abilities: Apparently we’re supposed to believe that Hermione’s sister disappeared because she ran away and managed to end up in America. She acts like she’s lived there her entire life. Nobody thinks twice about her running away because of her puppy dog eyes so she doesn’t have to go back like she wanted. Hermione’s skills are downplayed very poorly just so the Sue can get away much longer. Heather of course has psychic powers like the main character of Midnight. We later on learn that her rescuing Fiji with her “light” in fact “hadn’t drawn any unwanted attention. Joe was pretty optimistic that it hadn’t since she was only half angel and a guardian not a warrior, but Chuy wanted to be more careful.”
Notes: The writer says on their profile, “I have an obsession with OCs (that’s Original Characters for those of you that haven’t caught the lingo yet). There’ll probably be at least one in each of my stories.” No, Suethor, what you have an obsession with is inserting yourself into the story as an OC.
I’ve not seen the other fandom, but I hope this Sue’s abilities aren’t reflective of the fandom and an indicator the other fandom is a Mary Sue/Gary Stu work. You know, like Twilight.
Sample:
"I'm just the driver. The girl has some serious puppy eyes. I wasn't even going to come to Texas."
Chuy joined Joe at the front of the shop. He looked at the girl. Her arm was in a cast and there were bruises showing through rips in her t-shirt. Her hair and skin were covered with dirt. She carried nothing with her.
"How did you get here?" Chuy asked. The last they had heard of Anne's daughter she had been shipped off to live with a foster family in England.
"I ran away," the girl said, with a British accent never before heard in Midnight, "and I'm not going back."
Perpetrator: Cynder2013
Sue-O-Meter: Toxic
Cover/Banner Art: The writer’s avatar looks like a bunch of plant leaves frosted over.
Summary: “Demons aren't the only danger to Midnight. When Hermione Granger goes looking for her sister, who went missing five years before, tracking her to Midnight, Texas can only bring trouble to the town, and the two fallen angels who make their home there. The Midnighters are a family, and they won't let anyone take one of their own. AU.”
Full Name: Heather/Paulina Granger
Species: We’ve an American Sue. I think. Technically she’s from the same place as Hermione. She’s Hermione’s siter yet the daughter of Anne. Joe and Chuy from the other canon are conveniently her new dads. She’s apparently a half angel.
Hair: I’m guessing she’s got blond hair.
Eyes: I didn't catch onto this.
Markings: I'm hoping the character doesn't have angel wings.
Possessions: The abilty to run away despite being a minor.
Connection to Canon: The prologue starts off with actually telling us why Hermione’s sister is missing yet leaves us wondering how she got to America, just like many other American Sues. That’s how she ends up in the Midnight Texas Series. The actual first chapter opens up with Hermione making a potion to find her sister only, “it was embarrassing how long it had taken for her to make this potion. Three years with access to the largest library of magic in Britain and she hadn’t found the recipe until second year, when she took out Moste Potente Potions for the Polyjuice reciepe. Then the whole getting petrified by a giant snake had happened, and she couldn’t do the magic required out in the muggle world, so she was only getting around to making it now.” Sue is making a potion in Midnight at the same time. I’m guessing the Sue’s name is Heather. Some teens are outside vandalizing the “Antique Gallery and Nail Salon” because it is a soft target. By this the writer means they won’t get cursed or shot with silver bullets. She threatens to break some of their kneecaps. (…) Really? I get wanting to have a tough character, but this one doesn’t feel realistic. Chapter three (actually two because of the prologue) is more of Heather running around Midnight. The actual chapter three is about how she’s got special powers and they’re such a pain for her, but mostly nothing much happens. Chapter five jumps back to Hermione and her bagging out on visiting Hagrid. Apparently looking up books regarding stuff in America until “finally, Hermione found a town in Texas where two ley lines crossed and provided a minor boost to magical power.” It then switches back to Heather at a barbeque. This make her uncomfortable because of her psychic abilities! The forth chapter ends with them becoming main psychic in Midnight because Heather is so much better and sensitive with her powers than the male canon character. She’s then not allowed to leave town without permission in the next chapter and she complains about going to school. Bobo is apparently getting arrested for Aubrey’s death just like the beginning of the show because the murder weapon belongs to him. She wants to help with the situation. (You know, this is the girl who ran away across the ocean? It may be five years later, but how much help is she going to be? I guess a lot because she’s a Sue.) She wines afterwards that going to school is useless in chapter six. Someone calls her out for the fact she should be in school. (This makes me suspect she’s eighteen or under which means she’s thirteen or under when she ran away.) Chapter seven has Heather note she needs to practice using her light. Chapter eight we learn that “Joe and Chuy corrected her, saying her Light wasn’t just ‘some pretty light’ but an extension of her soul…” Using her light power has the repercussions of turning off her psychic powers and she falls out of bed in chapter nine when they return. Eventually this causes her to pass out and someone says “everyone calm down, you’re hurting Heather.” Gag. In other words this Sue is super powerful yet super weak at the same time, but only so the canon characters of the other fandom can walk on tip toes around her. They’re worried because Lem is twitchy. Something is causing everyone to come to Midnight as well. Chapter ten (eleven if you count the prologue) we learn “a succubus had killed two men just outside of Midnight.” Honestly, this story is painful due to the fact there is no real direction beyond following the books. Anyways, I’ve gotten to chapter thirteen as I’m not wanting to go into detail regarding stuff which can be found online for the other fandom. We finally see Hermione again and Ron is praising her for creating her potion to find her sister. Hermione is thinking, “it would be fascinating to learn about the Muggle perspective on magic” because “Professor Burbage won’t be teaching it until after Easter.” This is coming from someone who is Muggle Born for rying out loud. That’s when she arrives in Midnight after TWELVE chapters and a PROLOGUE! Said chapter ends with a wizard suddenly showing up and saying, “you are under arrest for illegally entering America and breaking the International Statute of Secrecy!” Hermione’s too intelligent for the first, but the way I see the Midnight canon the place isn’t a “Muggle” place.
Origin: For some reason Hermione Granger has a missing sister who somehow ends up in America. Second chapter instantly makes me wonder how old Hermione’s sister is when she ran away. Apparently Midnight, Texas is “four thousand six hundred eight miles and six time zones away.” Did you know it is 4,753 miles from London to Dallas and Dallas is actually one of the closest cities to London. Regarding the fifth chapter, “the last bit of this chapter played out like it did in the TV show. Most of the dialogue after the arrive from the plice car is from the show. However, I would like to remind people that I’m using the books a lot so not everything will be the same as the show.” So, when the writer’s not plagiarizing the show they’re plagiarizing the books? Actually, I don’t know how much the writer is copying in this one and if only the scene aforementioned is plagiarized. The writer admits to this in their own words.
Special Abilities: Apparently we’re supposed to believe that Hermione’s sister disappeared because she ran away and managed to end up in America. She acts like she’s lived there her entire life. Nobody thinks twice about her running away because of her puppy dog eyes so she doesn’t have to go back like she wanted. Hermione’s skills are downplayed very poorly just so the Sue can get away much longer. Heather of course has psychic powers like the main character of Midnight. We later on learn that her rescuing Fiji with her “light” in fact “hadn’t drawn any unwanted attention. Joe was pretty optimistic that it hadn’t since she was only half angel and a guardian not a warrior, but Chuy wanted to be more careful.”
Notes: The writer says on their profile, “I have an obsession with OCs (that’s Original Characters for those of you that haven’t caught the lingo yet). There’ll probably be at least one in each of my stories.” No, Suethor, what you have an obsession with is inserting yourself into the story as an OC.
I’ve not seen the other fandom, but I hope this Sue’s abilities aren’t reflective of the fandom and an indicator the other fandom is a Mary Sue/Gary Stu work. You know, like Twilight.
Sample:
"I'm just the driver. The girl has some serious puppy eyes. I wasn't even going to come to Texas."
Chuy joined Joe at the front of the shop. He looked at the girl. Her arm was in a cast and there were bruises showing through rips in her t-shirt. Her hair and skin were covered with dirt. She carried nothing with her.
"How did you get here?" Chuy asked. The last they had heard of Anne's daughter she had been shipped off to live with a foster family in England.
"I ran away," the girl said, with a British accent never before heard in Midnight, "and I'm not going back."