Sonja Raven-Sparrow

May 28, 2004 09:41

Hellspawn sue, for your enjoyment...or as a cure for your insomnia. Whichever.

TITLE: Birds of a Feather
CULPRIT: Sailor Elf
SUMMARY: "When a mysterious stranger arrives in Port Royal, Will and Elizabeth find out that she might have a connection to their old friend Captain Jack Sparrow"
BEST LINE: "'Commodore Norrington. He has a dislike towards pirates. I guess he even dislikes women pirates,' Will muttered to himself...'" Ah, idiot!Will, we meet again sad, strange, stupid, little man.

THE VERDICT



Walk the plank, bitch.

NAME: Sonja Raven-Sparrow
EYES: not described
HAIR: not described
DISTINGUISHING FEATURES: She wears a cloak and mask.
OH SO SPESHUL POSSESSIONS: Uhm, aforementioned cloak and mask.
OBNOXIOUS AND/OR IMPLAUSIBLE ORIGIN: Jack's daughter who goes searching for "answers" after her mother dies and her last word is "sparrow."
OBNOXIOUS AND/OR IMPLAUSIBLE CANON CONNECTIONS/AFFILIATIONS: Jack's daughter.
SOOPER SPESHUL ABILITIES: She can swordfight almost as good as Will.

THE "PLOT": So, the Pearl stops on some island for supplies. Jack's acting all funny. In really awkward dialogue Anamaria (spelled correctly!) and Mr. Gibbs discuss whether or not Jack might have some history with this particular island. Jack, of course, does. He goes to the "Raven" house where some old man tells him that they're all dead and the young girl is missing. The old man exposits about how everyone thinks her father was a man of the sea and a bunch of shit that's basically supposed to be "hinting" that Jack is the little Sue's father. Meanwhile, in Port Royal Will and Elizabeth are both talking to themselves in awkward dialogue wondering when Jack will be back for another adventure or something. Whatever. So, where is Sue you ask? Why, she's traveling incognito aboard some ship coming into Port Royal. Some guy on the ship is suspicious of her since he's never seen a man help out with the shipboard stuff (WTF?!). Apparently, Sue is wearing a cloak and a mask and never talks to anyone...because that totally wouldn't be conspicuous at all! Once Sue gets off of the boat she talks to herself in awkward dialogue wondering how she will find "answers." Yeah, I'm so freaking riveted. Anyway, Elizabeth decides to go tell Will that she saw a ship coming into port. Because, you know, a ship sailing into Port Royal is so damn anomalous that it's news that must be shared. She also sees Sue (or should I say "the figure" as the author insists on referring to her for the entire chapter) and decides to tell Will about that too. Elizabeth's life must be really boring. Just like this story. Anyway, before she can go bother Will at work with pointless bits of information her father calls her back in the house...for some reason. The Sue then meets Commodore Norrington who finds her suspicious and tries to apprehend her. She flees to Will's shop and there's the requisite sword fight. Will wins and unmasks her and we're supposed to be surprised that it's a girl. I fall out from not!surprise.

So, Will decides to help Sue. Who the hell knows why. She explains that the last word her mother ever said to her was "sparrow." She has no idea what it means. I wonder how the hell she decided to come to Port Royal, then. Sue spends some time complaining about how Commodore Norrington just like every other lawman she meets automatically assumes she's a pirate. Since she is actually supposed to be a pirate and wanders around looking absurdly conspicuous in a big ass cloak and mask I wonder what the fuck she's whining about. Anyway, Commodore Norrington figures out that Sue is at Will's shop. He wants to arrest her. Will doesn't want him to and says that even though she's a pirate she only came there for answers. For some reason this absurd line of logic somehow makes Commodore Norrington unable to arrest the Sue. Don't ask me why. I'm not in the mood for a headache. He leaves and we cut to some random pirate or something trying to find Sue because she's the secret to some treasure. Yawn.

Uhm, some stuff happens and Commodore Norrington and all his soldiers are somehow being deterred from arresting Sue because Will said so. Blah blah blah Elizabeth is still obsessed with telling Will the headlining news about a boat sailing into Port Royal blah blah blah pirates attack blah blah blah everyone gets captured blah blah blah I fall asleep.

NOTES: So, I would give the Suethor points for not having her Sue just throw on some pants and have everyone think she's a man...but the stupidity of trying to be inconspicuous while running around in a cloak and mask then wondering why people are are always finding you suspicious cancelled all those points out.

In closing, this story is really, really uninteresting and the dialogue is really, really awkward.

EXCERPT:
The many travels of 'the figure'. I wonder if the author actually thought this was suspenseful.

Elizabeth walked out of the front door, glancing from side to side before walking away from the house. She had to go tell Will her thoughts about that ship before she did anything else. She soon saw a hooded figure walking towards her home.

'Now that's odd,' she thought to herself as she watched the figure.

They passed each other and Elizabeth had to turn her head to continue watching the person. She stopped and had to worry slightly about this person. Elizabeth noticed that this person was also watching her.

"I have to tell Will about that person as well," she whispered to herself before starting towards the blacksmith shop.

But before she could go anywhere, her father stepped out of the house and saw her.

"Elizabeth!" called Governor Swann, causing her to cringe.

"What is it Father?" she asked turned to look at him.

"Where are you going?" he wondered as she stepped towards him.

"I have to go tell Will something," she replied.

"I understand your love of him but you've already seen him today and besides, I have something planned for this afternoon," he told her.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes before heading back towards her home.

###

The figure was walking through the town, looking for any clues to what they were looking for. The figure looked up to see Commodore Norrington heading towards them. They looked away from him as the two passed each other.

Norrington glanced at the person trying to hide their face from him. He grabbed the figure's arm and looked at them.

"Where are you going in such a hurry and why are you covering your face?" he wondered.

When the figure didn't answer him, he became suspicious. The commodore was soon beginning to fear there was a pirate on the town's hands again.

"What are you hiding?" he demanded before revealing the figure's wrist.

He didn't see a mark branding them as a pirate but what he did see what the tattoo and it was of a bird.

"You are a pirate, aren't you?" Norrington demanded.

The figure didn't answer that question either. Instead, they managed to break from the commodore's grasp and begin to run away from him. A few soldiers were nearby and Norrington looked at them with an angry stare.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Go after him!" he ordered them before they ran after him.

OMGWTF?! It's a GIRL?! I never would have guessed it. If, you know, I was braindead.

Will was heading into the back of the building to get some tools he needed when he heard the door open. He wondered who it would be as he decided to look out into the room. Since he didn't see or hear the person, he narrowed his eyes.

"What can I help you with?" he called out as he headed back out.

He looked at the figure that just walked into the building. The person was covered with a hood but it was obvious to him that they were new to the area. Whoever they were, they were looking at the swords.

"What do you want?" demanded Will as he walked up to the figure.

The figure was a good five inches shorter than the blacksmith but they twirled around and aimed a sword at him.

"If it has to be this way," Will said before backing away and grabbing a sword from another rack.

The two swords touched each other before the duel began. Will forced the person back towards the door but the person was not relenting.

"You are good," Will told the person. “Very good indeed."

"Let me pass. I have no quarrel with you," a voice came from behind the mask.

Will was slightly surprised by this for the voice sounded feminine. He expected it to be more masculine but he was unsure if it was really a woman or not. His face showed his confusion and the masked person snickered at him, lowering the sword in their hand.

"I will not let you get in my way. I have to get out of this place and somewhere else so I can continue my quest for answers," the figure told him. "You will not find out anything about me."

"So be it but I can't let you go by," Will replied as he lifted his sword again. “It will have to be this way then.”

The figure lunged towards him and then the duel continued. The figure was obviously not as powerful as Will. He kept pushing the figure back until he was right up against the door. Will placed a sword to the figure's neck and he could hear the person gulp.

"You have nowhere to go. Now to see who's behind the mask," Will muttered as he reached for the hood.

The head moved just a bit from his reach but he quickly reacted to it and pulled it down. What he saw slightly surprised him for he was only half- expecting it to be so.

It was indeed a woman.

TBC...

Some shit happens. I'm honestly too completely bored by this story to come up with something witty with which to head this excerpt up.

The captain watched as members of the crew made their way towards shore. He was happy with this. He had finally tracked down what he sought after many years.

"You have gotten away from me before but not now. Not this time. Every place I follow you to, you somehow mange to leave before I have a chance to catch you but this time will be different. Very different," he quietly told himself.

He looked over his shoulder to look at the crew that stayed on board the ship. He gave a small smile.

"We will find our way to the treasure now. We will soon be rich men," the captain told them.

The ones there began to smile at each other, also knowing that they were close.

"For many years, we've been searching for the Ilsa de Muerta, for the treasure of Cortez. The treasure that Barbossa and his crew had found all those years ago. We had no chance in finding it ourselves until the day we met that young woman for she knows where more treasure was located besides Cortez's treasure and what Barbossa's crew had plundered. I will persuade her to tell us where it is," the captain said with a quiet voice as he continued to stare at Port Royal. “We all will actually.”

It was slowly getting dark and he noticed this, giving a smile. "It is a good time to strike. She can not escape us now," he murmured.

###

Governor Swann was walking beside Commodore Norrington in the fort, talking about the day's events.

"There's a pirate in Port Royal and there's no way to get rid of him. Turner stopped us before we could do anything about it," Norrington told the governor.

"We should get rid of this nuisance as soon as possible. How could you tell it was a pirate?" wondered Swann.

"The tattoo he had on his arm. It was of a bird. Probably has some connection with Jack Sparrow for all I know. No one in Port Royal has tattoos like that. At least not that I'm aware of," replied the commodore.

Governor Swann sighed. He wanted to be rid of the man as much as Norrington did but they couldn't do anything about it at the moment. It was then that he heard gunfire in the distance.

"What is going on?" he wondered as he turned around.

Commodore Norrington looked to where the commotion was coming from before running towards the wall.

"Someone's attacking Port Royal!" he cried.

Neither of the men could believe it. The two of them remembered the last time Port Royal had been attacked by Captain Barbossa.

"Who could this be now? We have nothing that no one wants!" Swann demanded to know.

"I think we will find out soon enough," replied Norrington.

The commodore ran to help the others defend themselves against the attack as the governor hurried inside a nearby building.

###

Will and Sonja were heading towards the docks when the pirates landed on the shores of Port Royal. She looked over them do so as the two hid behind a building nearby.

"We have to move quickly and do it now before they find us," Sonja told Will.

He nodded but he was still very curious about the whole situation.

'What does she have with Captain Jack Sparrow? What connection would the two of them have? That is, of course, she is looking for Jack,' he wondered to himself.

"Will! Will, where are you?" they heard someone cry out.

Will was surprised as he recognized the voice. He raised his arms and Sonja tried to stop him.

"Elizabeth! I'm over here," he called over to her.

“What are you doing?” demanded Sonja.

Elizabeth hurried over to them and she gave Will a hug.

"What are you doing out here at this time?" Will wanted to know.

"I was looking for you to tell you something. I say someone earlier today that I thought you should know about. Also, there's a pirate ship out on the water. I fear they're going to attack Port Royal!" Elizabeth replied, not even seeing Sonja.

The female pirate faked a cough, causing Elizabeth to take notice of her then. Sonja realized then who this newcomer was and sighed.

"Who are you?" she wanted to know.

"The same person you saw earlier. My name is Sonja. I am looking for answers and your friend Will has agreed to help me. There are pirates in Port Royal right now so we'd better make our way to a ship and leave now before they find us," Sonja explained before turning around.

Elizabeth immediately became a bit suspicious of her and Will could tell as they followed her.

"We should trust her Elizabeth. If you were looking for answers, wouldn't you want help along the way?" he asked her.

Elizabeth nodded and sighed.

Some more shit happens. [See Above]

"Which one should we 'commandeer' as they say?" wondered Will as he looked over at her.

He remembered the word from when Jack told him. Will was glad that he did remember it.

Sonja looked around, looking for the right one to commandeer as the man said. She couldn't see any one that could fit their needs. She sighed as Elizabeth carefully watched her before leaning in beside Will's ear.

"Now who does she remind you of?" she quietly asked him. "Whom does her actions almost imitate?"

"Our dear friend Jack Sparrow. She's so much like him it's not even funny. She's even looking for something with 'sparrow' and I have a strong feeling that it deals with our friend the captain," he whispered back.

"Do you think they could be related? Maybe she's his daughter! How could he have a child anyway? We know him well enough to know that!" Elizabeth quietly told him, her thoughts beginning to pour out.

"No, it's possible. Gibbs said there's not much known about Jack Sparrow. Having children might be something but let's not jump to conclusions. She never said anything about her parents. We can't assume that because of a few coincidences," Will replied.

Elizabeth sighed as they both looked at Sonja, who appeared to be a bit upset. It appeared that she didn't hear their conversation. She was happy that the female pirate dind't hear what they had to say.

"What luck I have," Sonja muttered to herself as she looked over the ships in the water.

Her stare came to the ship off in the distance and she could almost feel herself shudder at the mere sight of the grand vessel simply sitting there in the water. Will and Elizabeth looked over at her, wondering what was going through her mind.

"Sonja, what's wrong?" wondered Elizabeth, placing a hand on her shoulder.

That caught the female pirate's attention and she turned to face them for a moment before facing the ground.

"It's nothing, really," she sighed, not hearing the footsteps coming up from behind them.

An arm suddenly went around Will and Elizabeth's throats. Sonja twirled around to see who was behind her. She stared at the two and growled.

"What do you want?" she demanded.

"What do you think we want Yas? It'll always be the same thing," replied Alige with a smile.

Elizabeth glanced over at Will. 'Yas'? she mouthed, not understanding what it meant. Will didn't either and he slightly shook his head.

"Alige and Parto, I should have known," sighed Sonja as she looked over the two. "Still doing Tranko's work for him?"

"I resent that. We all want what he wants," Alige retorted.

Sonja rolled her eyes as she gave a sigh.

"Give yourself in young one or else something will happen to these two friends of yours," Parto told her.

"What is this world coming to? I never thought that you would be taking hostages now," Sonja said with a smile. "Tranko doesn't take prisoners. He never did and he never will."

"Oh, come on now. If you come with us right now, we won't have to hurt these two and we will leave once our captain has you," Alige told her.

"Still doesn't seem like your style but I guess I can accept that," replied Sonja.

"Don't go with them," Will told her, beginning to struggle in his captor's arms.

"I have to. It's the only way that they'll leave this place alone unless their captain decides otherwise," Sonja replied.

She began to walk towards the water, heading for the docks. Will and Elizabeth were surprised with what she was doing. Even though they only knew her a short time, the female pirate didn't seem like the type to give up so easily.

The two other pirates soon freed the two and the two men followed Sonja. Will ran up behind them and tried to restrain Parto.

"Do you think you can stop us?" Parto asked him with a smile.

The man twirled around and managed to restrain Will. Elizabeth was very surprised at this and she tried to free her friend by attacking the man who held onto him.

"Alige," was all Parto had to say.

The other pirate took a hold of Elizabeth and kept her from going after Will.

"No!" she cried as she struggled to free herself from the pirate's grasp.

"You won't be seeing him anytime soon," Alige told her with a laugh in his voice.

"You won't get away with this," she snarled at him.

Parto glanced over at her and smiled at the statement.

"I believe we already have," he told her as he looked over at the town.

There were fires in various places; objects were thrown around the streets including many things that were knocked over onto their sides.

"We have ravaged your town in search of Yas and we finally have her. She'll be a great use to us," Parto explained as he looked over Sonja with a knowing and careful eye.

Elizabeth still struggled but was soon thrown in the direction of a nearby building. She hit her head against the side of it and was knocked unconscious. She fell to the ground in a heap.

Will couldn't believe what he just witnessed as he was forced towards the water along with Sonja and the two male pirates.
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