No, in fact, I'm the *other* Chris Nolan (crossposted from Facebook)
So as some of you might have seen on my status, I got mistaken for the famous Christopher Nolan the other day. A guy, remaining nameless cause I'm a sweetheart like that, sent me a message on here pitching his ideas for "my" next Batman movie. What follows is that message, with annotations (marked with "(#)") by me as I see fit to correct his mildly erroneous data. I must warn you,though, it appears he can't remember elementary grammar as the only punctuation he uses is ellipses and he doesn't capitalize anything.
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ok i read you need to have a good story i have several ideas...like you already created harvey dent aka two-face who kills robins family (1) there is an idea..there is clayface as a villian..the man bat....harvey (2) jokers girlfriend....catwoman.....have blade (3) make an apperance.....try to do a justice league thing creating the carachters for spin offs (4) like green lantern or wonder woman or my favorite aquaman (5)..mr frezze. riddler...poison ivy.....bat girl......the puppet guy (6)...the penguin...but by far i think clayface is the way to go.....actors for roles
Clayface:ryan seacrest (7)
man bat:hugh jackman
poison ivy: kelly kelly from wwe
harvey (2):christina ricci
robin:shai lebluff
catwoman:angilina jolie
blade:wesley snipes (8)
superman:the guy from superman returns (9)
wonder woman: the glamazon from wwe
aquaman: george cloony (10)
green lanturn (11):john cusack (12)
mr freeze: ewan mcgreggor (13)
bat girl: amand bynes or myle cyrus (14)
the penguin: that guy from i now pronouce you chuck and larry (15)
riddler:adam sandler (16)
***
1- Only in the Joel Schumacher movie "Batman Forever" in the "Official" continuum Dick Grayson (Robin #1) watched a mafia boss kill his parents in order to extort money from the circus that employed them. Jason Todd (Robin #2) is a young street orphan who first encounters the Dark Knight while attempting to steal the tires off the Batmobile. And Tim Drake became Robin #3 while his parents were both alive, granted Obeah Man poisons and kills mommy, but daddy doesn't die until many years later when Captain Boomerang shoots him. And we just wont count Stephanie Smith cause she wasn't actually a Robin or Carrie Kelly cause she's in the future.
2- Harley. as in Harley Quinn, you stupid twit...
3- Blade is a character in the Marvel universe, even though I *think* they did have a crossover story, I'm pretty sure this ain't gonna happen in the movies...
4- Already in the works, already pigeon holed, already forgotten
5- That's just sad... Aquaman is one of the lamest major superheroes out there...
6- The Ventriloquist
7- No, just no. Sure Basil Karlo (the original Clayface) was a B movie actor, but Matt Hagen was a treasure hunter who was poisoned by radioactive protoplasm. Preston Payne was a scientist suffering from hyperpituitarism who used Hagen's blood to create a cure but became a clay-like creature that needed to pass his condition onto others to survive whose condition was used as a metaphor for drug abuse and sexually transmitted disease. Sondra Fuller was a chick (Lady Clay), and Cassius Payne was just the son of Fuller and Payne. None are "pretty boys" though. And furthermore, NO I don't want Ryan fucking Seacrest in a Batman movie.
8- In December 2007, it was reported that Wesley Snipes had launched a lawsuit against New Line, director David Goyer and the film's producers, because he was forced to give up screen time to Ryan Reynolds and Jessica Biel. Further, Snipes alleges he did not receive his salary upon agreement and was not afforded the decision-making power he was entitled to as a producer. So probably not gonna happen, fanboy.
9- Brandon Routh
10- Clooney, with an E, and WHAT?! How did you think that was a good idea? So far I've been, "Eh, maybe..." But Clooney as Aquaman? Mickey Rourke would be better, if you wanted to do bearded Aquaman, or John Schneider as the younger pretty boy incarnation.
11- Green Lantern, use your E's, son.
12- Maaaaaaaybe as Kyle Rainer's Green Lantern, but if you're doing a movie, it'll be either Hal Jordan or John Stewart dawning the mask, and I dunno who I'd put for either. But I'd learn toward Jordan cause him and Bat's had epic internal battles!
13- Patrick Stewart is the only man allowed to play Mr. Freeze! It's TOO perfect, the only comic book character more perfect for him was Prof. X, and he's done him 3 times already!
14- I though Alicia Silverstone was bad enough, you really wanna scrape the bottom of the barrel, don't you? Maybe they'd be better for Spoiler...
15- Kevin James, too tall. And you can't get much better than Danny DeVito, at least no one else comes to mind...
16- What? You sure you don't want Pauly Shore? Personally I think Neil Patrick Harris would be better...
***
ok i read you need to have a good story i have several ideas...like you already created harvey dent aka two-face who kills robins family (1) there is an idea..there is clayface as a villian..the man bat....harvey (2) jokers girlfriend....catwoman.....have blade (3) make an apperance.....try to do a justice league thing creating the carachters for spin offs (4) like green lantern or wonder woman or my favorite aquaman (5)..mr frezze. riddler...poison ivy.....bat girl......the puppet guy (6)...the penguin...but by far i think clayface is the way to go.....actors for roles
Clayface:ryan seacrest (7)
man bat:hugh jackman
poison ivy: kelly kelly from wwe
harvey (2):christina ricci
robin:shai lebluff
catwoman:angilina jolie
blade:wesley snipes (8)
superman:the guy from superman returns (9)
wonder woman: the glamazon from wwe
aquaman: george cloony (10)
green lanturn (11):john cusack (12)
mr freeze: ewan mcgreggor (13)
bat girl: amand bynes or myle cyrus (14)
the penguin: that guy from i now pronouce you chuck and larry (15)
riddler:adam sandler (16)
***
1- Only in the Joel Schumacher movie "Batman Forever" in the "Official" continuum Dick Grayson (Robin #1) watched a mafia boss kill his parents in order to extort money from the circus that employed them. Jason Todd (Robin #2) is a young street orphan who first encounters the Dark Knight while attempting to steal the tires off the Batmobile. And Tim Drake became Robin #3 while his parents were both alive, granted Obeah Man poisons and kills mommy, but daddy doesn't die until many years later when Captain Boomerang shoots him. And we just wont count Stephanie Smith cause she wasn't actually a Robin or Carrie Kelly cause she's in the future.
2- Harley. as in Harley Quinn, you stupid twit...
3- Blade is a character in the Marvel universe, even though I *think* they did have a crossover story, I'm pretty sure this ain't gonna happen in the movies...
4- Already in the works, already pigeon holed, already forgotten
5- That's just sad... Aquaman is one of the lamest major superheroes out there...
6- The Ventriloquist
7- No, just no. Sure Basil Karlo (the original Clayface) was a B movie actor, but Matt Hagen was a treasure hunter who was poisoned by radioactive protoplasm. Preston Payne was a scientist suffering from hyperpituitarism who used Hagen's blood to create a cure but became a clay-like creature that needed to pass his condition onto others to survive whose condition was used as a metaphor for drug abuse and sexually transmitted disease. Sondra Fuller was a chick (Lady Clay), and Cassius Payne was just the son of Fuller and Payne. None are "pretty boys" though. And furthermore, NO I don't want Ryan fucking Seacrest in a Batman movie.
8- In December 2007, it was reported that Wesley Snipes had launched a lawsuit against New Line, director David Goyer and the film's producers, because he was forced to give up screen time to Ryan Reynolds and Jessica Biel. Further, Snipes alleges he did not receive his salary upon agreement and was not afforded the decision-making power he was entitled to as a producer. So probably not gonna happen, fanboy.
9- Brandon Routh
10- Clooney, with an E, and WHAT?! How did you think that was a good idea? So far I've been, "Eh, maybe..." But Clooney as Aquaman? Mickey Rourke would be better, if you wanted to do bearded Aquaman, or John Schneider as the younger pretty boy incarnation.
11- Green Lantern, use your E's, son.
12- Maaaaaaaybe as Kyle Rainer's Green Lantern, but if you're doing a movie, it'll be either Hal Jordan or John Stewart dawning the mask, and I dunno who I'd put for either. But I'd learn toward Jordan cause him and Bat's had epic internal battles!
13- Patrick Stewart is the only man allowed to play Mr. Freeze! It's TOO perfect, the only comic book character more perfect for him was Prof. X, and he's done him 3 times already!
14- I though Alicia Silverstone was bad enough, you really wanna scrape the bottom of the barrel, don't you? Maybe they'd be better for Spoiler...
15- Kevin James, too tall. And you can't get much better than Danny DeVito, at least no one else comes to mind...
16- What? You sure you don't want Pauly Shore? Personally I think Neil Patrick Harris would be better...