I'm sick of being told what to do.
I am beyond tired of people thinking they know what's best for me, beyond tired of people not letting me control my own life, beyond tired of being told what to do. I am 28 fucking years old, and I have lived on my own for the last ten years. I am not a child, and I am not a teenager, held to curfews and other people's decisions.
First, there's my mother. She constantly wants to know where I am, what I'm doing, whom I'm with. She wants to know when I am "in for the night" (i.e. when I have walked my dog for the last time during the evening). She even wants to know what I talked about with my therapist each week.
And, now, there's people telling me what I should do regarding my apartment situation, and the fact that I am going to move to another apartment.
Of course, my mother was immediately critical: "That's a terrible neighborhood. You can't move there. I think you should move onto my street."
Nevermind the fact that I've already researched the crime rates in my soon-to-be new neighborhood, and there is less crime there than where I live now. And nevermind the fact that my mom has an obvious ulterior motive for wanting me to move onto her street: If I lived on her street, she would have me at her beck-and-call for cleaning and running errands for her. Ironically, her street has a higher crime rate than both my current neighborhood and my soon-to-be new neighborhood.
Then, my sister saw a picture of my soon-to-be new apartment building online, and she described it as "decrepit." I've already said that I don't like the outside of the building: It is very drab and dreary, brown brick. But "decrepit" isn't exactly the right word, because it's not like the structure is falling apart. It's just a really fucking old building (it was built around 1930).
And, today, my sister's boyfriend made a huge deal that my soon-to-be new neighborhood is not a safe neighborhood, because it is near "the bottoms." Technically, it's in an odd little area between downtown and what's known as Franklinton. And, as I've said, I have already checked the crime statistics, and it's not as dangerous as where I currently live (which is near the state university campus).
I don't actually have a lot of options for moving to a really classy neighborhood, because I have a Section 8 rental voucher, and I have pets (one dog and two cats). So, it's basically a matter of finding the least dangerous neighborhood I can, considering the fact that I am limited due to being a Section 8 recipient. And I am really fucking tired of people thinking I'm just recklessly looking at potential apartments, as if I don't know what I'm doing, as if I don't know what I'm dealing with.
Then, on a mostly-unrelated note, my sister's boyfriend pissed me off while I was watching a Placebo video on the on-demand cable service that my sister has at her house. I was watching the video for "Infra Red" on their big screen TV, and I made the comment that Brian Molko was especially sexy in that video. My sister's boyfriend (whom I'm quite sure has never even heard of Placebo) said: "He looks like he's trying to look like the singer from My Chemical Romance." I informed him that Placebo has been around longer than My Chemical Romance. His response: "My Chemical Romance is a lot better, though."
That really pissed me off. Don't get me wrong, I like My Chemical Romance quite a lot. But to say they are better than Placebo is insane. It just takes one look at MCR's standard fanbase to figure that out, the age demographics, etc. MCR is more of a trendy band than Placebo (although, I really don't think MCR intends to be a trend, and as I said, I do like them). Placebo is less of a trend, and therefore has more staying power/credibility.
But I think what pissed me off most about my sister's boyfriend's comments about Placebo is the fact that I could tell damn well that he was not familiar with the band. I could tell that he had never heard of them before I put on the video for "Infra Red." And I really don't think anyone can make the statement that one band is better than another, when you've only just heard one song by one of those bands. He clearly didn't have enough to go on, not enough knowledge of Placebo to make the comment that My Chemical Romance is better.
Meh. I am annoyed. More about the control issues than the dissing of Placebo, of course.
I want, I need to live my own life.