I started looking for a warning sign
I'm having a bad day. For no reason... it's quite stupid of me.
Deep down, I know I'm going to fail. Yes, it's quite a skewed way of thinking, and I probably should take the noose off my ambition, but I can't help it. I try to stay positive, but I can't all the time. I get stupidly scared. "Of what?" you may be asking yourself. Well, gentle viewer, that is a good question, of which I do not hold the answer.
These feelings creep up on me suddenly, too, without warning and without anything to spark the feelings. I've been a happy camper lately, even earlier this morning, but I just suddenly felt insecure and scared, and pretty crappy too. It's also a pretty craptastic rainy day.
I was driving to class... but I started crying for no reason, the negative thinking just kicked in. So, when I got to the parking lot I tried to chill for a while. It didn't work. I stupidly turned around and drove home. So yes, right now I'm missing class and I feel really crappy about it, I even started thinking about dropping out for this semester. My fears are screwing with me, and ultimately, screwing with my judgement and with my life's decisions.
No one is waiting for me to fail... no one but me.
Deep down, I know I'm going to fail. Yes, it's quite a skewed way of thinking, and I probably should take the noose off my ambition, but I can't help it. I try to stay positive, but I can't all the time. I get stupidly scared. "Of what?" you may be asking yourself. Well, gentle viewer, that is a good question, of which I do not hold the answer.
These feelings creep up on me suddenly, too, without warning and without anything to spark the feelings. I've been a happy camper lately, even earlier this morning, but I just suddenly felt insecure and scared, and pretty crappy too. It's also a pretty craptastic rainy day.
I was driving to class... but I started crying for no reason, the negative thinking just kicked in. So, when I got to the parking lot I tried to chill for a while. It didn't work. I stupidly turned around and drove home. So yes, right now I'm missing class and I feel really crappy about it, I even started thinking about dropping out for this semester. My fears are screwing with me, and ultimately, screwing with my judgement and with my life's decisions.
No one is waiting for me to fail... no one but me.