(Kamenashi) Hayato; my son... my lover... IX
"Haya..."
Kame trembled.
"Haya... your dad... he loves you so much, Haya."
"He loves you... so much."
"So, don't think that... your father... is a bad man."
He wiped his tears with the back of his hand.
"He loves you, Haya... he loves you so much."
He forced a smile, and took a deep breath.
"Hayato..."
"Your tou-san and I..."
"He and I..."
This is it...
Kame thought.
You deserve to know the truth, son...
But he broke down and cry.
"Your tou-san..."
He sobbed.
"He and I..."
Kame didn't get to finish as he was suddenly pulled by the teen, and his face came crushing with his son's chest.
"Enough..."
The teen's hold immediately tightened around him.
"That's enough..."
He buried his nose in the older one's soft locks.
"I'm sorry... I am so sorry..."
Kame clutched the teen's shirt and cried even harder.
"I hate myself."
The teen stated.
"I'm no better than uncle Pi."
"I made you cry..."
He trembled.
"I didn't mean to..."
"I am so sorry..."
Kame shook his head and wraps his arms around the teen's neck.
"Haya is not wrong..."
Kame sniffed.
"Tou-chan is wrong, Haya..."
"Forgive tou-chan, ne...?"
The teen released his hold around the man, and shook his head.
"I still stand on my ground."
Hayato eyed him.
"I don't see you as my father."
"H-Haya..."
"No..."
He pulled the older man back to his embrace.
"I... I don't mean it that way... I just... I-"
"I don't know how to tell you..."
Kame took a deep breath, and pushed himself away from the teen, and cups his face.
"Haya..."
The older one smiled.
"I told you, right? You can tell me anything."
"I don't like to see your troubled face."
He wiped the teen's tears that escaped his right eye.
"I feel helpless..."
"Don't worry, tou-chan will listen to anything you've got to say, and I promise I won't get ma-"
"Suki da." >I love you.
The teen blurted out.
"Tou-chan no koto, suki da." >I love you
Kame smiled, chuckling softly.
"Haya..."
"Thank you."
He ruffled the teen's hair.
"Even though the way you say it wrong, I love you too, sweet heart."
Kame flick his forehead lovingly.
"Haya no koto, aishiteru."
Kame gave him a brief hug, and then look him in the eyes again.
"Tou-chan, haya no koto aishite-"
"I know the difference!"
The teen cut him off.
"Suki da yo!"
He gritted.
"I love you."
He grabbed the older one's wrist, and gripped it slightly.
"That's why I told you..."
"I don't see you as a father..."
"Because I fell in love with you!!!"
"The kind of love a son shouldn't have for their father!"
He exclaimed.
"But... but you're not my father, so..."
"So... so.. it's o-"
"THAT'S ENOUGH!"
Kame snatched his wrist away from the teen.
"ENOUGH!"
"What games are you playing, Hayato?!"
Kame glared at him.
"I admit I'm wrong from not telling you the truth, but all I'm doing is protecting you!"
"I'm not playing anything, Kazuya-san, I'm seri-"
"Kazuya-san?"
The older man said coldly, his eyes turned to slit.
"I told you then, and I'll tell you once again..."
"Blood line or not, Hayato, you're my son."
He gritted.
"I raised you!!!"
"I gave everything up to raise you, and you will show me your gratitude, and RESPECT ME AS YOUR FATHER!!!"
The teen lowered his head and cried.
Kame pants, tears threatning to fall from his eyes.
"What are you... playing at, Hayato..."
He closed his eyes.
"If you are swinging that way, I don't mind, I accept you any way you are..."
He opened his eyes, and wiped away his tears.
"That's enough..."
He sighed.
"I've had enough..."
Kame walked towards the door, want to walk away from the room.
He doesn't need this right now.
He needs a fresh air, and away from the teen right now.
He can't stay around, cuz if he does, he'll give in-
"Don't... go..."
Kame stopped in his track.
"Please... don't go..."
The teen crawled to him, and hugged him, burying his face in the older one's tummy.
"Don't go... please..."
A sense of flashbacks, that painful memory he tried so hard to bury, plays itself in his mind.
(Suki and Aishiteru both means love. Suki is usually say to someone like your lover, or when you're confessing to the person who you want to be your lover... Aishiteru is same meaning, but I think you can use this to say you love your friend, or your parents. Kame thought Hayato just means he loves him anyways, whether he's his father or not...
I don't know, I can be wrong... :P )
19 years ago
"Kazu..."
"You have the nerve to call me that, Akanishi."
Jin winced.
"Kazuya... you know I didn't..."
He trembled.
"I didn't mean to."
"I don't love her, and... the reason I stayed was because I can't let her abort-"
"Can you put yourself in my shoes?"
The younger one cut him off.
"I bet you can't, Jin-kun."
Kame sighed, looking away, he closed his eyes and forced a smile.
"Kazuya..."
"You promised me..."
Slowly, tears began trailing out of his beautiful tired face.
"You said those things to me, right?"
"You promised me happiness, and you took it away."
"It hurts too much this time, Jin."
Kame wiped his face with his sleeves frantically.
"I can't- I'm not sure if I can handle anymore pain."
He shook his head.
"We should-"
He swallowed the lump in his throat.
"We should just stop this all at-"
"NO!"
Jin grabbed his shoulders.
"Kazuya, don't- please... don't say that..."
"Love, don't... don't do this to us..."
He cupped his cheek with his right hand.
"Don't throw our love like that, Kazuya..."
Kame closed his eyes, only to open it seconds later and look Jin in the eye.
The image in front of the older man broke his already broken heart into millions of pieces.
And his hold on the younger man loosened.
"I didn't throw it away..."
Kame shook his head, he gently pried Jin's hands off him.
"You did."
"Maybe... maybe we weren't meant to be."
Kame scoffed softly.
"And... it's best if we completely stop this for our sake."
"For our friends and family's sake."
Kame took Jin's right hand in his.
"I don't want KAT-TUN to just disappear like that... I don't have the heart to jeopardize our friends' carrier."
Jin shook his head, breaking down in front of Kame.
"Let's not put our friends in our problems, ne?"
He forced a smile.
"I love KAT-TUN as much as they do, so, if this KAT-TUN disappears, what else do we have?"
"Kazu..."
Kame turned around, bit his lips, muffling his cries.
"Congratulations..."
He smiled.
"I heard it's a baby boy."
Giving his former lover a nod, he turned the door knob around, and opening it wide.
"Kazu..."
Jin crawled.
"Kazu, don't go..."
"Please...
He cried.
"Love, don't leave me.."
Kame turned around, crying silently.
"Oyasumi, Jin..."
Kame closed the door, and left their shared apartment building.
Jin stared at the ring in his palm.
He really done it this time, he really hurt the love of his life.
And without wasting anymore time, he dashed out, trying to chase the younger one.
Not caring his reputation as the biggest idol in the country, he ran frantically to every corner, every block, looking for his lover.
Occasionally bumping into people, and grabbed random strangers that has his lover's figure.
He decided to go back and get his car.
Kame buried his face in his hands, and cried silently.
"Young man, are you okay?"
The taxi driver stopped at a red light, and looked behind him, making sure his passenger is not sick or anything.
"Hn..."
Kame nodded.
"Just... I failed my entrance exam for Tokyo University again, and I don't know how am I going through with this..."
He wanted to stab himself for telling a cheap lie.
"Ah, is that so?"
The old man smiled kindly.
"Hey, I know, it's not just any school, being that it is the most elite and top school in the country, but hey, Tokyo University is just another school, young man."
"If you don't get it the first time, then try the second time."
He took a couple of tissues and handed it to him.
"And if the second or third is the same result, then keep trying until you're sick of it."
"Because that's just how it goes, ne?"
"And later, when you passed it, doesn't mean you won't be facing anymore hardships."
The old man started to drive again.
"Life is all about pain, ne?"
"And, you learn from pain and tears, not from laughters and happiness."
"Laughters and happiness only stay for a moment in your heart, and you only keep some in your memories. Unline the pain and tears we experienced. Whether it's big or small, we kept them, we remember them all, because for the next time, maybe we know what we should do in that situations."
"Ne?"
Kame nods, and smiled a little at him.
"Thank you."
The driver nods, and continued to drive away.
~
Passerbys gasped as they heard loud screech and a loud crash following soon after.
Some too stunned, they stare at the two vehicles clashed.
And some frantically reaching for their cellphones to ask for help.
Ambulance and their paramedic teams rushed their way to save the victims inside.
"One didn't make it, sir."
"In the white van, everyone has their seat belt on, and they're concious."
"The young man in the black Toyota.... didn't make it..."
"Find information about the man, we should inform his families."
"His families won't be the one to mourn for him..."
"The entire country will..."
"What do you mean-"
The paramedic showed him the man's driver's license and I.D. to the police.
The man sighed, and closed his eyes.
~
The next day, everyone in the country were grieving over a big loss.
Akanishi Jin, the A of KAT-TUN died in a car accident.
K-TTUN heard it from their manager, early in the morning, they were just going to bed, to finally retire for the day, but that one phone call from their manager and Johnny-san, made them all froze on their spot.
Not caring how they look like, they dashed out of their apartments, wearing their pjs, crumpled shirts, Koki went shirtless, and Junno went with his slippers.
Kame looked at the lifeless form from outside of the room.
He saw his friends in each other's arms, crying, comforting each other.
Jin's mom buried her face on her son's chest, and he could hear her calling for him.
His father lowered his head and cried silently.
Reio covered his mouth to muffle his cries.
"Kame...?"
Ueda called for their youngest friend's attention.
His face scrunched up, and tears began rolling down his face.
"Jin..."
"JIN!!!!!!!!!!!"
He pushed his way in to the room, towards his love.
He grabbed the other's cold hand, and kissed it few times, then placed it on his cheeks.
"Jin... wake up..."
He cried.
"Please... baby... I take back what I said..."
"Jin... don't do this to me, love..."
He kissed the hand again.
"Jin... Jin... wake up... wake up, Jin..."
"Kazu-kun..."
Jin's mom breathe in deeply, then wraps her arms around his shoulders from behind.
"He's gone, sweet heart."
She whispered.
"He's gone."
He shoved her hand off him, and shook his head frantically.
"Jin..."
He cupped his cheek this time.
"Jin....?"
"Sweet heart... he's gone..."
She said once more, this time, in a whisper.
Kame buried his face in the crook of Jin's neck, and screamed.
"JIN!!!!!!"
Kame gasped, and he immediately crouched down, and pulled the teen in his embrace.
"Please... don't leave me..."
"Don't leave me...."
"I won't..."
Kame cried.
"I won't leave you, Haya..."
"I'm sorry..."
"Don't leave..."
"Shhh..."
Kame cooed.
"I'm here, sweet heart..."
Hayato cluthed on his shirt, and kept on crying.
"I'm not leaving, sweet heart..."
Kame kissed the top of his head, his temple, and his cheeks.
"I'm here, baby... I'm here... holding you."
Hayato nodded, but despite that, he's still crying.
The image of his love turned his back on him few minutes ago scared him.
He thought for sure he stopped breathing for a moment.
But he's happy... yet still incredibly terrified.
"I love you so much..."
The teen finally wraps his arms around the older one's slender figure.
Kame smiled sadly, and tightened his hold around Haya.
"Me too, love..."
Kame whispered.
"You have no idea..."
After sometimes, they let go of the other from their embrace, and look at each other in the eye.
Kame smiled softly at the teen, and wiped any tears residue on his tired handsome face.
Hayato closed his eyes, and cup the hand on his cheek.
"Is this real...?"
"Yeah..."
He heard the older one replied softly.
And when he opened his eyes, he saw the older one smiling at him.
"Haya..."
"I'm sorry to make you like this..."
"I too hate myself for making you so upset..."
"I've never seen you in distress like that, sweet heart."
He whispered.
"I hate myself for making you cry like-"
The teen placed his index finger on the older one's lips, and shook his head.
"Don't."
The teen smiled a little.
"I don't hate you for that, I'm not mad... I was not then, I'm not now."
"I was... confused."
Kame nodded.
"Ne..."
The teen pulled him to his embrace again.
"Um... this is real, right?"
"I mean... you... you also..."
He gulped.
"I wasn't imagining those things, right?"
"I mean... if this is all a dream... please.. don't wake me up..."
He sobs.
"Let me just stay in this frozen time, where I hear you say you love me too, and have you in my arms..."
"No..."
Kame caressed the teen's messy locks.
"It's real..."
"I'm here... with you..."
He whispered.
"You're holding me in your arms..."
"I'm here, Haya..."
He ran his hand up and down the teen's back.
"Do you feel my touches?"
"Do you hear my frantic heart beat?"
The teen tightened his hold, and nodded slightly.
"I'm sorry for the way I acted just now..."
The older one nuzzled his nose in the teen's neck.
"I'm just like you, love... We're the same..."
"I'm afraid."
"Afraid of you, might leave me if you know the truth."
"I'm terrified of you leaving me, and scared you might think of me as disgusting, or crazy..."
"Yet I..."
Kame sniffed.
"I made your worst nightmare came true, ne?"
"I'm so sorry, Haya..."
"Hnn..."
The teen shook his head.
"It's okay... I forgive you..."
"I love you so much..."
"I love Haya so much too..."
After sometime, they retreat back to the older man's room.
Kame helped tucking in the teen in the bed, and soon after settled himself next to him.
He immediately wraps his arms around the younger one, and smiled at him.
"Let's sleep, okay?"
The teen only nodded.
"..."
"Haya...?"
Kame frowned.
"What's wro-"
A pair of soft warm lips gently crashed with his own.
His eyes widened.
Jin....
He held back the tears that are threatning to fall again.
Gomen ne...?
I lost you because of my foolishness then...
Kame closed his eyes.
I lost you love, but I won't lose him...
I won't lose Haya...
Haya is our precious one, love.
That's why, Jin... forgive me...?
When they pulled away, the teen blushed, and wouldn't look at the other in the eye.
"Ah, ummm... oyasumi to-..."
"Kazuya."
The older one wraps his arms around him.
"I don't mind if you call me by my name."
"Kazuya...-san?"
Hayato stuttered.
"Okay."
Kame laughed.
"Makes me sound so old..."
The older one looked down and sighed.
"You're perfect the way you are, though..."
The teen whispered.
"Kazuya-san."
Kame flicked his forehead lovingly, and flashed him a small grin.
"Sleep, you have school, and I have work..."
He sighed.
"Looks like we're going in late..."
"Oyasumi, Kazuya-san..."
"Oyasumi, Haya."
He's our precious one, Jin...
And I'd do anything to protect him.
Forgive me, love.
I'm sorry, Jin...
~~~
"Awww, do you have to go home, uncle Tatsuya?"
The teen pouts.
"Well, yes, I do."
He sighed.
"And so does your Yuichi ji-chan and the others."
"But-"
"Haya."
Kame crossed his arms.
"No matter how many times you asked, whined, or protested, they're still going home."
"Tou-chan... you're kicking your own friends out?!"
Hayato exclaimed.
"I'd never do that to Jay, Nick, or Riley!"
"Tou-chan so cruel!!!"
"Haya, they have their lives there."
Kame gave his temples a massage, feeling a slight headache coming.
"Maa maa..."
Koki ruffled his hair.
"We'll visit you on your graduation, alright, young man?"
"And we'll bring you more toys, ne?!"
Junno grinned.
"You give me a call, and I'd make a trip to buy you anything you want, Haya-chan!"
Ever since he was little, he would always have a hard time seeing his uncles off back to Japan.
He'd beg them to stay longer even though they'd spent more than a month each visit to New York.
They all thought he'd stop doing it by age 14, but it surprised them when he actually cried clutching on Ueda's shirt, preventing the man to enter the chek in.
"Ah, we have to go soon..."
Maru pointed.
"Well, Kame-chan, guess we'll see you there, ne?"
Junno gave him a hug.
"Take care of yourself."
"You too, Haya-chan!"
"Okay, Junno ji-chan."
He nods.
"You take care too, and take care of uncle Tatsuya."
"Oi oi!"
Ueda pinched his cheek.
Hayato grinned, and gave him a hug.
The rest of his other uncles as well.
"Kame..."
Pi eyed him.
"Will you be okay?"
Kame sighed contentedly.
"I will be."
He smiled.
"I deffinately will be, Pi."
"He's here, that's why."
Pi's gaze met with Hayato's and the older man gave him a smile.
"Take care, Shuuji."
Pi turned back to him, and gave him a hug.
"But... it doesn't mean I gave up yet..."
"I'll wait, Kame."
He tightened his hold.
"I'll wait..."
"Uncle Pi!!!"
Hayato exclaimed.
"They're going to leave you, you know!!!"
Pi faked a smile, and chuckled at the teen.
"Hai, hai."
Pi ruffled his hair.
"Be good, ne? And don't forget to call me, tell me all the details about your basket ball play offs later."
"Okay..."
Hayato nodded, grinning.
"Let me help you with your bag till the check point."
"Oh, alright, you are a strong man after all, rig-"
"I won't allow it."
The teen stated.
"Eh?"
Pi blinked.
"Ka- tou-chan..."
He cleared his throat.
"You can't have him."
"He's mine."
"Hayato..."
"Just beacause I accept them together, doesn't mean I'd welcome you with an open arms when it comes to him."
The teen said coldly.
"Haya-chan, you probably misunderstand our convo on the balcony that time and-"
"Who knows..."
He glared at the older one.
"Maybe I've known more than you think-"
"Oi, Pi!"
Koki jogged towards their way.
"You're so slow, hurry it up, pink freak."
"Jya, uncle Pi!!!!"
Hayato handed him back his luggage and grinned.
"Coming back again, have to care yourself there, ne~"
"Hayato..."
Koki sighed.
"Your Japanese is all wrong."
"Young man, when we're back this summer, we're seriously learning things properly again!!!"
Maru shouted.
"HAI~"
The teen waved.
"Bye Bye UNCLES~"
"I see..."
Pi sighed, shaking his head.
"So this is how it is, huh..."
"That's right, uncle Pi."
Haya smirked.
"And I won't hesitate, just because you're one of his good friend."
Pi scoffed, and turned around, following the others to check point.
Before he was out of the teen's ear shot, he slightly turn and gave his nephew a reply.
"Like father, like son, ne..."
He clenched his fist, at that.
But he stood on his ground.
He won't hesitate to do the craziest when it comes to the older man.
The older man is his now, and he won't let anyone take him away.
"Haya?"
Kame touched his arm.
"They promise to visit for your graduation, right?"
"Daijobu, your uncles won't break it."
"Hn."
The teen nodded.
"Let's go home?"
Kame gave the other a smile, and walked ahead of the other.
"Kazuya-san..."
Kame turned around, only to look at his hand now entwined with the teen's.
"W-wanna- ummm..."
The teen cleared his throat.
"Would you like to go out sometime?"
Kame pretends to think, and sighed.
"Yadda yo."
"Eh..."
"Hehe..."
Kame grinned.
"If you can ask me properly, I'd consider."
The teen pouted.
The pout soon wiped out upon remembering something.
"Kazuya-san..."
He said softly.
"Would you like to go out on a date with me?"
The older one chuckled, and cupped his cheeks.
"Ii yo."
He shrugs.
"I'd love to."
With a smile on each of their faces, the two left the airport hand in hand.
tbc~
okay.... ughhh, i feel somewhat not satisfied with this...
how was that everybody?
sorry i bring up the angst, and mix it with sort of fluff in the end...
i failed, huh?
:(
i also apologize for the late update, everyone.
been busy lately,
gomen nasaiiii *bows*
thank you so much for reading up to this point, and I'll do my best on the next chappie!!!
*hugs*
Your comments are always appriciated and loved!!!!
thank you so much, everybody!!!!
*gives cupcakes*
*and hide*