Answering the Warmonger
Our local paper here in McHenry County, the NORTHWEST HERALD, publishes almost any letter submitted to it as long as it is not profane or libelous. And that’s great. It makes for a spirited opinion page and offers folks of a broad range of views often missing from the columns of other publications.
In their infinite wisdom, however, the editors limit submissions from any one individual to one per 30 day period. I understand that, too. It keeps the letters from being monopolized by a few prolific zealots. Of course the really determined find a way around it. Letters are submitted in the names of other family members or friends. One fellow, a local Democrat, I’m sad to say, who had the same relationship to reality as a gold fish to jockey shorts, was once caught red-handed submitting a letter in the name of his dog. And of course political candidates often create glowing letters of endorsement which are dutifully submitted by their supporters. The system isn’t perfect, but it manages to keep the drain fairly clear of hair clogs.
But sometimes, that limit can be exasperating. Earlier this month I submitted a letter about an attack on prevailing wage ordinances (I ran it here, too.) By the rules I am verboten from submitting another missive until early August. But yesterday, July 25, the paper ran a letter so outrageous that it begs denunciation. Since I can’t answer in the pages of the HERALD, I will have to be satisfied by doing so here. The audience may not be as large, but it is demonstrably brilliant, discriminating, and attractive to boot. I am also not bound by the paper’s 200 word limit here, but I will try to restrain my rant.
Below is the offending letter followed by my would-be response.
ERADICATE ISLAMIC EXTREMISTS
To the Editor:
The world is confronted by legions of Islamic militants intent upon a death struggle with the United States, European Union, Russia, India, and allied nations. Islamic extremist militants are not interested in a peaceful compromise.
President Bush should ask Congress to formally declare war on Islamic extremist groups Hezbollah, Hamas, Islamic Jihad, and all sister groups which participate in violence against the rest of us. The declaration of war should extend to any nations or parts of nations which support the militant Islamists.
We should declare total war now, inviting like-minded nations to join us.
Yes, this will be an all-out, no-holds-barred, nuclear war. Total destruction of Islamic militant groups and their supporters is the goal. They want to fight us? OK. Completely snuff them. Good riddance.
The whole world is going mad, with Islamic extremists leading the way. We have irreconcilable differences with them.
This really will be messy, but I believe the United States and its allies have the capability to hit the big delete key on Islamic extremist violence, and we should do it now.
Gerry Guenther
Spring Grove
DELETE AMERICAN EXTREMISTS
To the Editor-
So the charming Gerry Guenther of Spring Grove wants to “hit the big delete key on Islamic extremist violence.” How? By “no-holds-barred, nuclear war” against a laundry list of Islamic militant groups as well as “any nations or parts of nations” that support them. He allows that this might be “messy.”
Lets see, by my calculation, we’ll have to nuke Iraq and Afghanistan, of course, (can we get our folks out first?), Iran and Syria. But we can’t stop there. Lebanon harbors, albeit largely against its will, Hezbollah so Beirut’s a cinder. And of course the slivers of ground under the Palestinian Authority on the West Bank and in Gaza have to go. Maybe the Israelis will take care of those for us and pray that prevailing winds don’t dust Jerusalem, Tel Aviv and Haifa with fall out.
Then of course there are our friends and allies. Pakistan and Saudi Arabia for instance. There is Indonesia, Thailand, and the Philippines, all of whom have home grown insurgencies. Egypt has the Muslim Brotherhood on its hands.
The former Soviet republics in the Caucuses and surrounding the Caspian Sea are a viper’s nest of guys with turbans and RPGs. So out they go. And, oops, the whole southern tier of Mother Russia itself is infected so Putkin better look out.
No one’s going to miss the hapless Somalis, after all, and the Sudanese have been getting to big or their britches, too.
There are millions of Muslims intermingled with our new found friends in India. But we’ve already decided to share nuclear technology with them so maybe they can figure out how to sort the followers of Allah from the decent Hindus.
Some things are dicier. The damn French have all those North African rioters. The Germans and Italians, even the Dutch have big, undigested Muslim populations. A whole industry has arisen wringing hands over the “destiny of demographics” which predicts they will out breed the Europeans and transform the Continent into just another province of the new Caliphate. Better scourge them now before it gets out of hand. No body will miss Paris, anyway.
A pity about our most loyal friend, the Brits. The country is almost over-run with Paki’s and other undesirables. There are mosques in London where fanatic Imams babble about Jihad. Scratch ‘em off.
By my count we are talking about hundreds of millions, maybe billions of folks to snuff out. And that’s just in the areas of immediate destruction. Who knows about who’s down wind and gets to experience the long, agonizing death of radiation poisoning rather than instant incineration. A swath of the globe from the Nile to the South Pacific rendered un-inhabitable for millennia.
But that doesn’t disturb the serenity of Gerry Guenther’s sleep. His unspoken assumption is that Islam is by nature “extremist” and it adherents must be rooted out and “eliminated.” He agrees with the Mullahs who declare that there are no civilians. They are all enablers of the terrorists or the breeders of the next generation. A Final Solution must be found.
Guenther is sure that although “messy” the war to the death will not bother him in Spring Grove. It will be fought far away, out of sight. Surely the awesome military might of the United States and its allies (oh, I forgot, we don’t have them any more) will prevent any retaliation. And if the heroes of our military fall, they will not include him or his children. The war can always be fought by someone else, folks more disposable than he. He can stay in picturesque Spring Grove and drive his SUV undisturbed.
The temptation, of course, is to write Guenther off as just a fringe crack pot. But I have heard too much idle tavern conversation about “turning Iraq into a sea of glass.” I know of too many religious zealots aching for Armageddon. Too many neo-con intellectuals haunt the highest corridors of power in the current administration who differ not in kind but merely in degree.
Decent Americans must not only condemn Guenther and his ilk for the moral leapers that they are, but must actively oppose them at every turn. If we do not today’s lurid fantasy is destined to become tomorrows nightmare.
Patrick Murfin
Crystal Lake
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