You've been pretty much doing that all your life- this is going to have to get a little more specific.
==> Zurahe: Be kind of a badass musicallyThere we go, that you can handle- especially since the trip doesn't seem to have damaged your A.V.E.S. any. Thank god too, because you really do hate the way imps shriek when they attack en masse. Totally
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This is totally a thing you can do.
==> Attempt the highly dangerous x2 REMIX COMBO.
HELL YES.
HELL
FUCKING
YES.
==> Now be the angry runt troll.
You are now LYNDIS BRYSE. What will you do?
==> Lyndis: Explore.
This is easily done, now that you have your trusty if not particularly pleasant or cooperative crow steed, which you have named Marty McFly in tribute to that cult classic, In Which A Young Troll With An Unsatisfying Life Becomes Embroiled In Time Shenanigans Regarding A Flying Four-Wheeled Transportation Device And Endangers His Own Existence In His Own Past, But Ultimately Changes Both His And His Ancestors' Circumstances For The Better In The End, Which Culiminates In A Lightning Strike That Returns Him To His Improved Present Where He Becomes Embroiled In Further Time Shenanigans In A Teasing Sequel HookYou don't actually like the movie that much; you just did it for the pun ( ... )
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That's easy- most of these imps don't even present a challenge anymore, even with as far back on your Echeladder as you've been knocked. Only the big ones take you more than a hit or two to take out, and even then, that's because you're toying with them. You can hardly wait to clear the gate and get to the next area, where the imps are sure to put up at least some semblance of a fight.
==> Hear some idiot.
You barely hear him the first time- but the second time has you looking up, searching for where the voice is coming from as you dodge a few strikes carefully. Whoever it was had almost thrown off your rhythm, and you can't say you like that. You're tempted to ignore him, but you're pretty sure he's already seen you looking.
==> Zurahe: Be appalled.
'Appalled' doesn't even begin to cover it- just what does that jackass think he's doing, riding one of the consorts like a goddamn hoofbeast? Granted, it wasn't like you hadn't planned on doing the same- but you'd planned on asking ( ... )
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That other troll seems kind of pissed about McFly, for some reason, but you're not particularly put out by this. Consorts who try to peck your face off just because you got ripped out of your own session and dumped at the base of the tower they're hanging around for no good reason? Yeah, they deserve what they get.
In McFly's case(and quite a few others, come to think of it, but you only needed the one trusty steed), this was the business end of a chain-flail square between the eyes. It's the only way they'll learn!
RIDING
WHAT THE HELLS IT LOOK LIKE
==> Lyndis: Blast a few more imps out of existence.
There is an unexpected benefit to fighting from on high. The weight on the end of your chain-flail only gains momentum as it heads downward; it's just blasting through imps. That and the level-grinding you've been indulging in since you got your bearings has you maybe seven or eight rungs up your echeladder already!...not that you really understand much about what the fuck an echeladder is yet, or ( ... )
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You are in complete shock right now, and aren't really sure just how this kid's own consorts didn't kill him before he got pulled to this session. You decide it's enough playing around though, since you want to strike with this mood while it's hot, so to speak.
==> Bring out the big guns.
If it means you get to rant your heart out at this jackass that much quicker? Gladly. The Righteous and the Wicked go back into your Sylladex, and a few notes later, Demon's Kiss falls into your hands, strings thrumming. You slip backwards away from a swing and duck under the backhand, fingers taking their places on the strings.
looks like I've got du~mber fish to fry~ bo~y~s~
The bassline is slow and booming, and all around you, imps start slowing down. Not all of them, but enough to make a difference when your fingers shift, slide up and pick up the pace and the faster you play the faster you move. You're not feeling generous enough to use any of your buffs on the jackass abusing the consort- and you'll ( ... )
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With your Bard abilities in tandem, you manage to do that a lot quicker than you had been managing before. When you finish, you immediately turn toward your 'company', hands on hips.
==> Zurahe: Correct this fuckup.
Gladly.
a~a~actually it was a wa~ltz
moro~n
You raise a hand and poke him right in his scrawny chest, not used to finding someone so close to your size to rant at.
and fu~u~uck you I sing wa~a~ay better than troll rick astley fucknu~b~♪
You shove past him then, intent on heading toward the console he's using as a 'mount', wondering if he has any idea how hard this might make it for you all to get cooperation from this land's consorts. You croon soothingly as you approach, something your lusii used to do when you were upset, and reach out to start untangling the chain.
do you have a~ny i~de~a~ how badly you mi~i~ight have just fu~cked us a~ll over~♫
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Okay, even if you had one of those, you don't feel like making yourself look like an idiot in front of your bitchy new acquaintance. You clearly do not need any help at all in that regard. (For some reason.)
==> Lyndis: Get poked.
Oh hell no that did not just happen. There are cacti and needlebeasts that would envy the amount of bristling that you're doing right now.
okay just where the FUCK do you get off
==> Lyndis: Lose track of what you were just saying.
You lose track of what you were just saying. Wait, what is she - ?
Oh no.
Oh HELL no. She is not actually doing what you think she is, is she? That's your goddamn hard-won consort mount! You need it for things! And for stuff!
==> Lyndis: Deploy KLEPTO MODUS.
Technically, your modus does not need to be deployed; it's pretty much always active. It captchalogues things without you even noticing, most of the time. But you can encourage it to pick up things, you know, manually. It'd be kind of a stupid modus if you couldn't put things ( ... )
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You roll your eyes and almost don't- but then you notice him bristling like a wet purrbeast and you figure a little jab couldn't hurt.
I doubt I would at a~ll with your scra~wny ass
Burn. You ignore him for the most part as you try and untangle the chains on the bird- only to make a very undignified sound when it suddenly disappears. Sweet troll madonna no he did not just captchalogue that bird.
==> Flip tables.
As you are sadly lacking any suck furniture to flip you decide to do the next best thing.
==> Flip the idiot.
Working on it. You reach out and snatch the front of his shirt and heft him up a little, eyes narrowing.
do you re~a~lize~
that you just ca~ptcha~logued
a consort
you pan-rotted bulgesucker~♫
You give him a little shake to drive the point you're about to make home.
we nee~d their coope~ra~tion to win the ga~me nookstain~♪♪♪
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Wow, you can't believe she actually went for that. Clearly you should have finished that sentence instead of interrupting yourself, but you didn't and now you've both got to bear witness to her embarrassing herself.
okay seriously
that was just fucking sad
But wait, what's happening here -
==> Lyn: Ascend.
You do indeed ascend an inch or two when she hauls you off the ground, and now you are very definitely the one embarrassed. Nothing like being lifted by a sack of potatoes (by a girl, no less) to drive home what an inadequate physical specimen you are!
==> Lyn: Begin struggling immediately.
No problems there! You'd started almost before your feet left the ground.
==> Lyn: Express displeasure vocally.
Oh, there is absolutely no fucking doubt that is going to happen.
WHAT THE FUCK
PUT ME DOWN
anything that tries to peck out my goddamn ocular spheres is fucking fair game!
and they werent exactly inclined to fucking cooperate eVen before i did anything!
they attacked me first!
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You really don't- the opening was there, you took it, and damned if he was going to make you feel like an idiot for taking it.
for you may~be
fu~cking dea~l
==> Zurahe: Shake that moron like a trollaroid picture.
You never stopped shaking the idiot, even if it's pretty much intermittent at this point. You can't believe how ridiculous this guy is- or how easy it is to pick him up. It's like he weighs even less than you do- and that's saying something.
==> Zurahe: Interrupt the yelling.
Easy- or at least, it would be if this guy would stop flailing. You give another hard shake and keep glaring.
I'LL PUT YOU DO~WN WHEN YOU CALM YOUR HO~RNS FUCK♪
now li~sten bite size
you su~u~ure you didn't earn them try~ing to peck them out~♫
seems like you mi~ghta brought it on yourse~lf
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You have never been chill about being restrained in any way - someone in your position (read: a weak, cowardly, low-caste runt of a particularly murderous race) can't afford to be at the mercy of anyone else. Mercy is not something any troll should be banking on, in general.
Girl or not, you are currently at her mercy and this needs to change.
Your psionic camouflage kicks on, rendering you suddenly invisible in her hands, and at the same time - ideally, right when her grip is relaxing in surprise - you give a particularly terrific squirm. Freedom (and, from the sound of it, some ripped seams in your clothing) is yours!
==> Lyn: Bask in freedom.
Actually, you're a lot smarter (or paranoid) than that. Basking is something idiots do when they think they're safe. Smart trolls - the ones that are still alive, like you - know when they're safe, because they have personally assured it ( ... )
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After that chameleon trick? You sure as hell are- and you have to admit, that's a pretty handy power to have, all things considered. You can't say you much appreciate the sudden deployment of a weapon though, but you can't much blame him for that either. As low on the spectrum as you both are, you both know just how your race can be.
Even if you have a hard time actually pulling that shit on anyone but highbloods- usually because they all pull it first.
==> Zurahe: Be the deadpan snarker.
Actually, you have a pretty hard time dropping your speaking patterns, unlike some trolls you know- so you settle for just being snarky instead.
we~ll to be fai~r you do look about snack size
plu~s you have that wei~rd kind of shifty-eyed prey~ thing going on
==> Attempt some measure of civility.
Well, it beats winding up in another fight after that, so you captchalogue Demon's Kiss and push your A.V.E.S. out of your eyes raising both eyebrows.
su~re thing ( ... )
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You might as well. You couldn't hold the camouflage indefinitely even if you wanted to, and if you continue conversing with her she's just going to pinpoint your location by sound anyway. Plus, she's put away her weapons. That's a good sign, right...?
You give your psionics a break, and you simply fade back into view.
yeah yeah sure whateVer
im sure they were totally fucking justified in diVebombing me the second i arriVed
those poor misunderstood creatures
but unless you wanna try selling me on the argument that i shouldVe serVed the greater good of the session by standing there and getting eaten aliVe
im gonna call my dealing with them justified self defense
and marty here is the spoils of fucking war
so him and all the other consorts can fucking deal
and so can you
==> Lyndis: Tone it down ( ... )
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You hate just about most trolls really. Platonically that is. You don't deal well with stupid, and your race is unfortunately rampant with individuals affected by this particular malaise. Still, you can't help but stare incredulously at him.
Honestly, this guys must not deal with animals much. Hivestem troll maybe. Would explain a lot.
ne~wflash~
this just i~n genius
you ever thi~nk maybe they were a little frea~ked by a troll no~o~o~t from this session su~ddenly being in their te~rri~tory~♫
what the fuck would yo~u do if some weird troll just showed up on your turf~♫
cull fi~rst ask questions la~a~ater ri~ght~♫
tha~t's what I thou~ght~
==> Calm the hell down.
He makes that really, really hard, the little know-it-all-wannabe bulgestain. But you take a breath and roll your eyes, and then run a hand through your hair, wincing when you come up short. You keep forgetting you cut most of it some off. Fucking weird.
nah, I can ha~a~a~ndle the consorts man ( ... )
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Rolling your eyes is a particular skill of yours. Which is kind of silly, since you'd hardly ever had a face-to-face conversation with a troll before your session started, but some things are instinctual, no matter whether anyone else can see them or not.
Man, how has this girl survived this long? Is she actually suggesting you should have given strange, hostile creatures attacking you sympathy? The benefit of the doubt? An engraved apology? Ridiculous.
okay seriously ( ... )
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Your life in a nutshell really, always running across the (in your opinion) dumbest dregs of troll society to have to put up with. You wonder just what the hell your ancestor did in her life that you've probably inherited her shit luck or bad karma. Bitch.
you seem pre~tty big on absco~nding
why didn't you just do tha~t♫
==> Zurahe: Pitch a fit at the nerve of him.
Nnnnnnnope. Effort you're not willing to waste on this little shirt-for-brains
You don't really bother getting mad- or at least, not mad enough to want to break him in half. You've been killing imps all morning and frankly, you're not in the mood to start up the protocols required for a strife with another player. You really have to wonder if he listens to himself half the time of if he just sets that stupid mouth on auto-douche and lets it run as long as he's got the breath for it.
You wouldn't be surprised if that was the case to be honest.
what reason is that though I means se~riously
I'd hand out a few caegars to hear thi
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