(no subject)
Surprising absolutely no one who's seen me go through this cycle roughly 340843498208454 times before, today I feel better. Isn't it just peachy KEEN to know that all this weird moody shit I go through begins and ends with miniscule little shifts in biochemistry and not whole bloody lot else? Dude- biology can totally kinda dress itself up like destiny sometimes. That is, if you fuck around with brain chemistry, you fuck around with the person. Gee.
Anyway, the whole shitstorm gets set off by my blood sugar, which no longer zips up and down like a dragonfly on crack. Now it merely kind rolls up and roooollls down. And it takes my brain chemistry with it, so the Evil Doctor has put me on a mild antidepressant to shield Teh Brain from the blood sugar's grubby mitts somewhat. But eh, it's a bandaid solution and it can't do a whole lot anyway. It can only patch serotonin, and my problems with beta endorphin are about 208402349432 times worse.
So today I'm drawing chrysanthemums for The Whack Of Illustrations that She Who Must Be Obeyed requested I do. Kewl. I don't mind working as an ad hock illustrator for a while. I like drawing flowers. They really lend themselves to my swoopy expressive don't-bug-me-with-that-damn-accuracy style.
Also making the webcomic work. That is- the backstory. The backstory is coming together. Got most of it flowing nicely today, and I suspect it had a whole bunch more to do with my position on Teh Cycle of Doom rather then the matcha or espresso. (Though- yay caffeine anyway.) Was listening to stuff on NPR about the Sorpranos finale- and while I never got around to watching the show, it reminded me of something key. I've only obsessed over the model of an ensemble drama for AGES. I love that shit, it's the core of everything I wanna write and what I tend to gravitate to anyway. It doesn't really matter to me if it's about starfleet officers on a space station, or mobsters in new jersey, or.. well, XF isn't exactly a classic drama show in that mold, but damn if I wasn't addicted to it for ages. I really like the structure of having a whole whack of characters to work with and develop deeply.
And it gives me a path to follow. The audience is drawn into watching a series like that for the shinies and the plot- same as I predicted for CoH. They hang around long enough to get emotionally invested in the characters- or not. I don't think anyone started watching the Sorpranos because they gave a damn about Tony and Carmela. That came later- after they'd been watching for a while.
I don't even own a tv. I should dl stuff but I don't get around to it. Maybe I should do netflix. And what I'd do first is get my paws on the House MD dvds. Whenever I go to The House of She Who Must Be Obeyed and The Alpha Of The Universe, that's what I watch. Like a fiending shivering junkie.
However, I fucking hate commercials and not watching tv has made me become resensitized to them and aadkjhadkfjakfjsdkf. Yuck! Hate! I can feel myself being manipulated by sleazy fucking marketing people!
Yeah so, anyway I feel BETTAR. I'll feel like crap again in a few days and then I guess I'll feel BETTAR again. Ad infinium. Until I heal more. I guess.
Anyway, the whole shitstorm gets set off by my blood sugar, which no longer zips up and down like a dragonfly on crack. Now it merely kind rolls up and roooollls down. And it takes my brain chemistry with it, so the Evil Doctor has put me on a mild antidepressant to shield Teh Brain from the blood sugar's grubby mitts somewhat. But eh, it's a bandaid solution and it can't do a whole lot anyway. It can only patch serotonin, and my problems with beta endorphin are about 208402349432 times worse.
So today I'm drawing chrysanthemums for The Whack Of Illustrations that She Who Must Be Obeyed requested I do. Kewl. I don't mind working as an ad hock illustrator for a while. I like drawing flowers. They really lend themselves to my swoopy expressive don't-bug-me-with-that-damn-accuracy style.
Also making the webcomic work. That is- the backstory. The backstory is coming together. Got most of it flowing nicely today, and I suspect it had a whole bunch more to do with my position on Teh Cycle of Doom rather then the matcha or espresso. (Though- yay caffeine anyway.) Was listening to stuff on NPR about the Sorpranos finale- and while I never got around to watching the show, it reminded me of something key. I've only obsessed over the model of an ensemble drama for AGES. I love that shit, it's the core of everything I wanna write and what I tend to gravitate to anyway. It doesn't really matter to me if it's about starfleet officers on a space station, or mobsters in new jersey, or.. well, XF isn't exactly a classic drama show in that mold, but damn if I wasn't addicted to it for ages. I really like the structure of having a whole whack of characters to work with and develop deeply.
And it gives me a path to follow. The audience is drawn into watching a series like that for the shinies and the plot- same as I predicted for CoH. They hang around long enough to get emotionally invested in the characters- or not. I don't think anyone started watching the Sorpranos because they gave a damn about Tony and Carmela. That came later- after they'd been watching for a while.
I don't even own a tv. I should dl stuff but I don't get around to it. Maybe I should do netflix. And what I'd do first is get my paws on the House MD dvds. Whenever I go to The House of She Who Must Be Obeyed and The Alpha Of The Universe, that's what I watch. Like a fiending shivering junkie.
However, I fucking hate commercials and not watching tv has made me become resensitized to them and aadkjhadkfjakfjsdkf. Yuck! Hate! I can feel myself being manipulated by sleazy fucking marketing people!
Yeah so, anyway I feel BETTAR. I'll feel like crap again in a few days and then I guess I'll feel BETTAR again. Ad infinium. Until I heal more. I guess.