Cucumber Thief Song (feat. Kelly Dodson)

[ttlynotblue]

STOP!
Do you know where your Cucumis sativus is at this time of night?
I don't mean to cause alarm but I have very strong reason to believe there may be a cucumber thief on the loose. Over the last three weeks I have come home to find any cucumbers I had left out on the counter to of mysteriously vanished during my absents. Even more alarming, the

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[tenshinomakai]

And you're sure it wasn't Poncho?

[ttlynotblue]

What interest would Poncho have in cucumbers? ... What interest would you have in cucumbers?!

Where were you the afternoon of August twenty first?

[tenshinomakai]

I don't remember. Maybe I was kissing you~

[ttlynotblue]

Ki- I- That's irrelevant!

And wasn't on the twenty first.

[tenshinomakai]

Hmm hm hm~ Well, regardless, I don't really eat and even if I did, I wouldn't eat cucumbers. Not my thing. Even if they are natural conductors of magical energy.

[ttlynotblue]

Then...

It must be a ghost; a ghost cucumber bandit! This is more serious than I thought!

[tenshinomakai]

Or it was Poncho. You should probably punish him.

[ttlynotblue]

Now you're just being ridiculous. Poncho isn't a cucumber ghost bandit, he's a Lumen.

[tenshinomakai]

A Lumen who eats cucumbers.

[ttlynotblue]

You think?

[tenshinomakai]

Definitely.

Also, stay out of my room for awhile, okay?

[ttlynotblue]

Uh, sure.

... This isn't about your dress, is it?

[tenshinomakai]

What about my dress?

[ttlynotblue]

I didn't ask your permission to go into your room before I fixed it.

Actually, since we're on the subject, you don't want me to do your laundry too, do you?

[tenshinomakai]

Oh...! No, don't worry about that. I appreciated it, but you don't have to do any of my laundry.

Just stay out of my room entirely for the next few days! I have a volatile potion brewing and your mere presence could imbalance it. I'll just have to visit your room~♥

[ttlynotblue]

My room? But I haven't even vacuumed!