hard times
I had to tell my students yesterday that Paul (the owner of Festival of Dance) is not allowing me to teach next year. It was really hard for me. I wish it could be different. I love all of those girls and some of them I have taught for three years. Paul stripped me of something that I cherished dearly. I loved watching those girls grow and achieve their goals in dance. I would have taught them if I wasn’t paid. Just the sheer joy of dancing and passing that on to others was enough for me. But now my years at Festival of Dance are over.
I sat the girls down in class yesterday and told them. I don’t know if I wanted them to be sad for me. I wanted them to know that this wasn’t my choice. I wanted them to know that I have thought heavily about what decision I should make. Since the recital I have been treated unfairly by the owner. It seemed as if he wanted me to quit. But I wouldn’t do that. I wouldn’t just leave those girls. I know of one of the girls who wants to follow me. She’s not one of my troupe members, but she’s a girl who I forged a great bond with. I was the reason she came to Festival in the first place.
It’s such a hard time for me. I feel like I losing a part of me that I loved so dearly. I even thought about leaving dance all together, thinking maybe it was time for me to leave the art I loved. I thought about it for a minute and then thought that I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t leave the art that has allowed me to express myself for so many years. Also, I couldn’t let Paul break me down. That man will not bring me down. He’s not worth it. He’s nothing to me. Nothing.
I will continue to dance. I’ve had some offers. This one lady wants me to run her dance program at her studio. Another wants me to teach jazz and perhaps run their competition team. I feel good to know that someone wants my talents.
I still will miss the girls that I have worked with for three years.