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"Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen nancybrown January 26 2012, 19:42:49 UTC
(tropes listed at the end)

"God damn you, Harkness!"

Gwen's shout echoed through the Hub. Jack winced. He watched as Ianto and Lois made eye contact and both ran for other area of the base as Gwen stalked through the main Hub, eyes flashing in anger.

"Yes, Gwen?"

"My husband, whom I love -- and I will likely have to say so on the witness stand when I'm brought up on charges for killing him -- had our baby's DNA tested without telling me. Care to explain why my daughter has your DNA?"

Her steps reached the bottom of the stairway. Jack made his way down carefully, mindful of the woman ready to shoot him.

"Well, there's the normal possibility."

"Don't you even dare. I know for a fact you and I never did anything that would cause a baby, thank you very much, Mister I Have Already Shagged Half The City."

"That's 'Captain I Have Already ....'" He stopped. Gwen was not going for jokes right now. "No. We never did."

"Are you sure we didn't? Did you Retcon me?"

He let out a breath. "I'm absolutely positive we didn't. Gwen, um." Jack scratched the back of his own neck. He'd been hoping never to have this conversation. "Did your parents ever tell you that you were adopted?"

"When I was eleven. They sat me down. We talked about it." Her eyes widened and then narrowed. "You're kidding me." She poked him in the chest hard. "You are bloody well kidding me!"

Jack smiled weakly. "I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm not. Neither of us was ready to raise a baby, and I already had one child support payment to make. And you know what this life is like."

Her face broke as the knowledge finally settled in. Gwen semi-collapsed, going to a sitting position on the bottom step and resting her head in her hands. "Oh God."

Jack knelt down beside her. "I thought it would be better if you never knew. I was going to stay away, but you kept coming back. I figured I could protect you better here."

"I hate you."

"I know."

"I really, really hate you."

He wrapped his arms around her anyway in a hug. "I know."

"You should have told me you were my father."

Jack bit his lip. "Well, if we're being completely honest with each other now, technically, I was your mother." Never, ever, ever doing that again, Jack thought.

"Oh God."

(tropes: Jack is someone's father, mpreg)

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remydesire January 26 2012, 20:01:39 UTC
Oh god, that would make so much more sense than canon!

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nancybrown January 26 2012, 20:58:16 UTC
It would explain EVERYTHING. :D

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen mcparrot January 26 2012, 22:02:22 UTC
Eeee. Jumps for joy.
I was always going for great granddaughter myself but Dad is brilliant. And mother is even better. Never thought of that one.
:-)

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen nancybrown January 26 2012, 22:06:11 UTC
Jack would have been a terrible mother, too. All sweets and no bedtime. :)

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen mcparrot January 26 2012, 22:09:42 UTC
Think of her table manners.

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen nancybrown January 26 2012, 22:12:40 UTC
Think of her other manners!

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen mcparrot January 26 2012, 22:20:10 UTC
Oh I was....

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen nancybrown January 26 2012, 22:20:46 UTC
LOL!

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stlscape February 1 2012, 15:48:44 UTC
*gigglesnort*

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen firesnap January 27 2012, 05:14:00 UTC
I can perfectly picture Gwen's face at the end. Loooved this.

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen nancybrown January 27 2012, 15:15:54 UTC
It's that half-sick, dawning horror sort of face. :D

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen bookwormsarah January 27 2012, 09:36:00 UTC
Oh I could hear Gwen's voice *so* clearly through this...

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen nancybrown January 27 2012, 15:14:54 UTC
She would be so pissed off at him. :D

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen aviv_b January 28 2012, 07:40:55 UTC
LMAO! Her mother!

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Re: "Paternity Test," Jack and Gwen nancybrown January 28 2012, 15:18:39 UTC
It could totally have happened ...

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