General stuff.
The going off the Seroquel is going well, by which I mean it's fine at the reduced dosage so long as I don't forget a pill.
If I do, it's a lot like the benzodiazepine withdrawal effects I went through when I tapered off the regular clonazepam/temazepam, which I suppose isn't that surprising considering that quetiapine -- Seroquel -- is related to the benzos, and while most folks supposedly don't have withdrawal symptoms from Seroquel, the ones who do may feel it in much the same way. It's less severe by far, and totally tolerable, but it's intermittently unpleasant, and it sometimes makes doing things not very enjoyable. And my mental energy has been quick to exhaust itself.
Other than that, I've been more alert and animated and able to think much more clearly. I've just been getting to sleep very late, and it's been harder, which is what the Seroquel helped me with.
And this week was the one-year anniversary of Tazendra's stroke. I've tried to not remember it, because it's easier, healthier, for me to weather grief that way, to just lose track of time and let days be days and not reminders of anything. It usually works well for me, but I can't forget the Ides of March, you know? So I'm trying to ignore the hurt as best I can and contemplating posting the silly song parody I started writing for her before she died. I spend every day mourning her loss, and it's still too near for me to spend a day celebrating her life. It's a nice sentiment, but that's for another time.
I really just . . . I just want to look in her cockeyed little goblin face and say "I missed you."
On the bright side, I wrote about 2,000 new words last night on Vengeance and Valor, and got some plotting done tonight, which is more than I've been able to do in the past year altogether, I think. It's a looong way from being done, still, but I'm hoping that being off the Seroquel will help, will be enough to get me writing regularly again. I really love this story, and don't want it to die just because I'm bipolar and the meds I need to take sometimes keep me from getting my shit together.
X-posted from Dreamwidth. Comment count:
If I do, it's a lot like the benzodiazepine withdrawal effects I went through when I tapered off the regular clonazepam/temazepam, which I suppose isn't that surprising considering that quetiapine -- Seroquel -- is related to the benzos, and while most folks supposedly don't have withdrawal symptoms from Seroquel, the ones who do may feel it in much the same way. It's less severe by far, and totally tolerable, but it's intermittently unpleasant, and it sometimes makes doing things not very enjoyable. And my mental energy has been quick to exhaust itself.
Other than that, I've been more alert and animated and able to think much more clearly. I've just been getting to sleep very late, and it's been harder, which is what the Seroquel helped me with.
And this week was the one-year anniversary of Tazendra's stroke. I've tried to not remember it, because it's easier, healthier, for me to weather grief that way, to just lose track of time and let days be days and not reminders of anything. It usually works well for me, but I can't forget the Ides of March, you know? So I'm trying to ignore the hurt as best I can and contemplating posting the silly song parody I started writing for her before she died. I spend every day mourning her loss, and it's still too near for me to spend a day celebrating her life. It's a nice sentiment, but that's for another time.
I really just . . . I just want to look in her cockeyed little goblin face and say "I missed you."
On the bright side, I wrote about 2,000 new words last night on Vengeance and Valor, and got some plotting done tonight, which is more than I've been able to do in the past year altogether, I think. It's a looong way from being done, still, but I'm hoping that being off the Seroquel will help, will be enough to get me writing regularly again. I really love this story, and don't want it to die just because I'm bipolar and the meds I need to take sometimes keep me from getting my shit together.
X-posted from Dreamwidth. Comment count: