Ode to Bruce DICKinson...
Okay, so this is a really weird and specific thing to complain about, but I feel personally denigrated, and have yet another weird reason to hate Iron Maiden.
I've been watching this six-part documentary series on Monty Python on Netflix Instant Queue called, "Monty Python: Almost the Truth". It's a really awesome series with interviews mainly from the five remaining members of Python, but also of comedians and famous people they influenced, friend and acquaintances, etc. I'm on the 5th episode which is all about Monty Python's Life of Brian and it's great! But then, this interview with Bruce Dickinson, from the band Iron Maiden, really bugged me:
The scene in question:
Centurion: What's this, then? 'Romanes Eunt Domus'? 'People called Romanes they go the house'?
Brian: It-- it says, 'Romans, go home'.
Centurion: No, it doesn't. What's Latin for 'Roman'? Come on!
Brian: Aah!
Centurion: Come on!
Brian: 'R-- Romanus'?
Centurion: Goes like...?
Brian: 'Annus'?
Centurion: Vocative plural of 'annus' is...?
Brian: Eh. 'Anni'?
Centurion: 'Romani'. 'Eunt'? What is 'eunt'?
Brian: 'Go'. Let--
Centurion: Conjugate the verb 'to go'.
Brian: Uh. 'Ire'. Uh, 'eo'. 'Is'. 'It'. 'Imus'. 'Itis'. 'Eunt'.
Centurion: So 'eunt' is...?
Brian: Ah, huh, third person plural, uh, present indicative. Uh, 'they go'.
Centurion: But 'Romans, go home' is an order, so you must use the...?
Brian: The... imperative!
Centurion: Which is...?
Brian: Umm! Oh. Oh. Um, 'i'. 'I'!
Centurion: How many Romans?
Brian: Ah! 'I'-- Plural. Plural. 'Ite'. 'Ite'.
Centurion: 'Ite'.
Brian: Ah. Eh.
Centurion: 'Domus'?
Brian: Eh.
Centurion: Nominative?
Brian: Oh.
Centurion: 'Go home'? This is motion towards. Isn't it, boy?
Brian: Ah. Ah, dative, sir! Ahh! No, not dative! Not the dative, sir! No! Ah! Oh, the... accusative! Accusative! Ah! 'Domum', sir! 'Ad domum'! Ah! Oooh! Ah!
Centurion: Except that 'domus' takes the...?
Brian: The locative, sir!
Centurion: Which is...?!
Brian: 'Domum'.
Centurion: 'Domum'.
Brian: Aaah! Ah.
Centurion: 'Um'. Understand?
Brian: Yes, sir.
Centurion: Now, write it out a hundred times.
Brian: Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. Hail Caesar, sir.
Centurion: Hail Caesar. If it's not done by sunrise, I'll cut your balls off.
Brian: Oh, thank you, sir. Thank you, sir. Hail Caesar and everything, sir! Oh. Mmm! Finished!
Roman Soldier: Right. Now don't do it again.
Man: Hey! Bloody Romans.
Summary of video: Bruce Dickinson ponders how Americans, who have never learned Latin, are able to find the conjugation scene in Life of Brian funny?
*headdesk*
Well Bruce, I don't know specific statistics or numbers, but the majority of Americans do have to take atleast one foreign language class in middle school, high school and/or university. We may not have had the draconian methods of British boarding schools, but the funny part of this scene is not only that if he gets the grammar wrong there is the threat of corporeal punishment - it's also funny because the Centurion is not angry about the message, he's angry about the incorrect conjugation and sentence structure. As well as how Brian is making all the same mistakes we've all made when learning other languages.
You see Bruce, Americans aren't all stupid assholes, we have the ability to see something and relate it to our own experience. I've never taken Latin - I've taken French, Spanish & Italian. I also have I never made such glaring grammatical errors, but I have witnessed them. So I get it, and I find it hilarious. So, fuck you for thinking so little of >300 million people.
Love, Jamie
I've been watching this six-part documentary series on Monty Python on Netflix Instant Queue called, "Monty Python: Almost the Truth". It's a really awesome series with interviews mainly from the five remaining members of Python, but also of comedians and famous people they influenced, friend and acquaintances, etc. I'm on the 5th episode which is all about Monty Python's Life of Brian and it's great! But then, this interview with Bruce Dickinson, from the band Iron Maiden, really bugged me:
Click to viewThe scene in question:
Centurion: What's this, then? 'Romanes Eunt Domus'? 'People called Romanes they go the house'?
Brian: It-- it says, 'Romans, go home'.
Centurion: No, it doesn't. What's Latin for 'Roman'? Come on!
Brian: Aah!
Centurion: Come on!
Brian: 'R-- Romanus'?
Centurion: Goes like...?
Brian: 'Annus'?
Centurion: Vocative plural of 'annus' is...?
Brian: Eh. 'Anni'?
Centurion: 'Romani'. 'Eunt'? What is 'eunt'?
Brian: 'Go'. Let--
Centurion: Conjugate the verb 'to go'.
Brian: Uh. 'Ire'. Uh, 'eo'. 'Is'. 'It'. 'Imus'. 'Itis'. 'Eunt'.
Centurion: So 'eunt' is...?
Brian: Ah, huh, third person plural, uh, present indicative. Uh, 'they go'.
Centurion: But 'Romans, go home' is an order, so you must use the...?
Brian: The... imperative!
Centurion: Which is...?
Brian: Umm! Oh. Oh. Um, 'i'. 'I'!
Centurion: How many Romans?
Brian: Ah! 'I'-- Plural. Plural. 'Ite'. 'Ite'.
Centurion: 'Ite'.
Brian: Ah. Eh.
Centurion: 'Domus'?
Brian: Eh.
Centurion: Nominative?
Brian: Oh.
Centurion: 'Go home'? This is motion towards. Isn't it, boy?
Brian: Ah. Ah, dative, sir! Ahh! No, not dative! Not the dative, sir! No! Ah! Oh, the... accusative! Accusative! Ah! 'Domum', sir! 'Ad domum'! Ah! Oooh! Ah!
Centurion: Except that 'domus' takes the...?
Brian: The locative, sir!
Centurion: Which is...?!
Brian: 'Domum'.
Centurion: 'Domum'.
Brian: Aaah! Ah.
Centurion: 'Um'. Understand?
Brian: Yes, sir.
Centurion: Now, write it out a hundred times.
Brian: Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. Hail Caesar, sir.
Centurion: Hail Caesar. If it's not done by sunrise, I'll cut your balls off.
Brian: Oh, thank you, sir. Thank you, sir. Hail Caesar and everything, sir! Oh. Mmm! Finished!
Roman Soldier: Right. Now don't do it again.
Man: Hey! Bloody Romans.
Summary of video: Bruce Dickinson ponders how Americans, who have never learned Latin, are able to find the conjugation scene in Life of Brian funny?
*headdesk*
Well Bruce, I don't know specific statistics or numbers, but the majority of Americans do have to take atleast one foreign language class in middle school, high school and/or university. We may not have had the draconian methods of British boarding schools, but the funny part of this scene is not only that if he gets the grammar wrong there is the threat of corporeal punishment - it's also funny because the Centurion is not angry about the message, he's angry about the incorrect conjugation and sentence structure. As well as how Brian is making all the same mistakes we've all made when learning other languages.
You see Bruce, Americans aren't all stupid assholes, we have the ability to see something and relate it to our own experience. I've never taken Latin - I've taken French, Spanish & Italian. I also have I never made such glaring grammatical errors, but I have witnessed them. So I get it, and I find it hilarious. So, fuck you for thinking so little of >300 million people.
Love, Jamie