to whom it may concern......
Today was a really was the day I told shay what i felt, i'm not good with words or my thoughts neccesarily ..but i tried. Shay is coming out here or we are going there soon...less than 8 weeks...scary thought, will the girl be mutual then? its easy now, right? I hope not..i hope the easiest part is meeting..putting the face and body to the name or voice on the phone. I dunno, my mind is blank tonight...writers block has struck me hard, i have a lot on my mind but I can't spit it out...and shay, my nickname used to be CHUCKLES! i finally remembered it last night before i went to bed!
my world is changing dramatically every second i live in it, i havem't even seen some of my 'best friends' i grew up with for nearly 2 years, is it for the good? most definately, they are a bunch of stoners anymore with no goals or ambitions - just to live off societies giving nature. Everyday I wake up and realize I am one luck guy...i have a great family, i have awesome friends (ones i still talk too) and an awesome girl..i have the 3 essential elements...I can live without a girl, or so i thought before I met shay....its weird, never have I been so happy or dominated by a feelings for a girl - which is bizarre (my word of the day) because towards girls I am typically a loner and a guy who lets the girls come to him (hey! its worked like 3 times!!)...but with shay, i knew i wanted her...from the first time i seen her on cam and pics..i knew i wanted it and need it, does that make any sense? has anyone else just felt an incredibly warm feeling about another human w/out even realizing it? Its very odd, sure..i could date girls here..i've done that..but why? he girls of my dreams is in new jersey..and i'm willing to work through all the bullshit in order to be with her...whether she lives here, there, or across the ocean...i can live with it, i'll make it work...she'll make it work...because why? to us, its worth it. And a lot of people never know love is mutual, but me and shay know it is....any why do i know this may be love? because i've NEVER felt something so pure, unselfish, and great in my life -- i used to be based on selfishness and whatever would HELP ME and make ME feel better, and for once in my life...i want to make someone else feel great, i want someone else to know how beautiful she is, how intelligent she is, and so on. To me, this is about shay...letting her spread her wings to her full extent - can i give her everything the world has to offer? No, but can I give her everything I have to offer? you bet your ass!
Today, I realized some stuff, life is not always peachy, life sucks ass, life is not always a comedy act in front of people, and life can be good...but life can also be incredibly magical. Today, I learned shay loved me, and she pointed it out in a lot of smart words and complex sentences that I could never replicate...so I won't even try...but, i do it my way..and shay knows I love her, i do...it sounds ironic never meeting...but I do, and I know i was supposed to find her, and I did. Life can be a funny thing, one day your happy, one day your unfulfilled, the next you may die, the next you may be given a miracle...and right now...i was given a miracle and her name is Shay...
till next time,
rob
my world is changing dramatically every second i live in it, i havem't even seen some of my 'best friends' i grew up with for nearly 2 years, is it for the good? most definately, they are a bunch of stoners anymore with no goals or ambitions - just to live off societies giving nature. Everyday I wake up and realize I am one luck guy...i have a great family, i have awesome friends (ones i still talk too) and an awesome girl..i have the 3 essential elements...I can live without a girl, or so i thought before I met shay....its weird, never have I been so happy or dominated by a feelings for a girl - which is bizarre (my word of the day) because towards girls I am typically a loner and a guy who lets the girls come to him (hey! its worked like 3 times!!)...but with shay, i knew i wanted her...from the first time i seen her on cam and pics..i knew i wanted it and need it, does that make any sense? has anyone else just felt an incredibly warm feeling about another human w/out even realizing it? Its very odd, sure..i could date girls here..i've done that..but why? he girls of my dreams is in new jersey..and i'm willing to work through all the bullshit in order to be with her...whether she lives here, there, or across the ocean...i can live with it, i'll make it work...she'll make it work...because why? to us, its worth it. And a lot of people never know love is mutual, but me and shay know it is....any why do i know this may be love? because i've NEVER felt something so pure, unselfish, and great in my life -- i used to be based on selfishness and whatever would HELP ME and make ME feel better, and for once in my life...i want to make someone else feel great, i want someone else to know how beautiful she is, how intelligent she is, and so on. To me, this is about shay...letting her spread her wings to her full extent - can i give her everything the world has to offer? No, but can I give her everything I have to offer? you bet your ass!
Today, I realized some stuff, life is not always peachy, life sucks ass, life is not always a comedy act in front of people, and life can be good...but life can also be incredibly magical. Today, I learned shay loved me, and she pointed it out in a lot of smart words and complex sentences that I could never replicate...so I won't even try...but, i do it my way..and shay knows I love her, i do...it sounds ironic never meeting...but I do, and I know i was supposed to find her, and I did. Life can be a funny thing, one day your happy, one day your unfulfilled, the next you may die, the next you may be given a miracle...and right now...i was given a miracle and her name is Shay...
till next time,
rob