she did..
love me. for just a while. and then it subsided. like everything else. like the wind. like the rain. like ocean shores and the sand that trickled behind it struggling to catch up. just like everything else.
and i know why. because i didn't run after it. i didn't bother. i may have been too drunk. or is it that i disregard my own feelings that much?
i feel like a piece of trash swirling in a miniature tornado that i saw once when i was eleven years old sitting on lunch benches in a covered area of a school that i'd much rather forget about. but i hurt people there, and people were hurt there by priests and by teachers. so i remember.
i remember that i was the same person then, that i am now. lonely, sensitive, and too damn full of pride to accept loss. but yet, i seem to float towards it constantly. like it's lost before it's even found.
really, what isn't lost?
everything returns to normal, things go back to the way they were. people fade away, and new ones seem to appear out of the blur. smoke screens and light shows and magic tricks and then you're there again, except now your someone else.
it's in the horizon. me and you. where the edge of the water touches the edge of the sky. what is there? do i run after the tide? do i let it drag me in to the deep end? am i too afraid to drown? am i too comfortable at the edge of the water?
and i know why. because i didn't run after it. i didn't bother. i may have been too drunk. or is it that i disregard my own feelings that much?
i feel like a piece of trash swirling in a miniature tornado that i saw once when i was eleven years old sitting on lunch benches in a covered area of a school that i'd much rather forget about. but i hurt people there, and people were hurt there by priests and by teachers. so i remember.
i remember that i was the same person then, that i am now. lonely, sensitive, and too damn full of pride to accept loss. but yet, i seem to float towards it constantly. like it's lost before it's even found.
really, what isn't lost?
everything returns to normal, things go back to the way they were. people fade away, and new ones seem to appear out of the blur. smoke screens and light shows and magic tricks and then you're there again, except now your someone else.
it's in the horizon. me and you. where the edge of the water touches the edge of the sky. what is there? do i run after the tide? do i let it drag me in to the deep end? am i too afraid to drown? am i too comfortable at the edge of the water?