nothings gonna stop me but divine intervention
When someone says something I don't like, when they hurt me without meaning to... it takes every piece of me not to want to hit them back ... to hurt them in return to find some cutting remark or to simply walk away so that they will be left wondering how to fix it, when all the while I'm the one who needs fixing. I see where things are. I see my level of anxiety rising with every breath, with every moment that I think about work .
what if i just let it go. what if i just wait, however long it takes. is it better to sit at home until he begs for more? or is it better to just accept things as they are? i mean is this really good enough? am i strong enough to take things day by day? or can i go back to the question that i have had to ask myself time and time again throughout this relationship... " do i want him because i like him or do i want him because i can't have him all the way? " i don't know. and i don't know when i will know. but i guess setting up these expectations only leave me wanting more, they leave me not trusting and frusterating with only myself to blame. how many times have i told a friend not to set up time limits for a boy without telling him? it only hurts you in the end. this i know and this i've seen but still i find myself looking forward to the months ahead and trying to see where we will be then. who we will be and what he will want from me.
can you tell me
did you find what you're looking for?
did you meet who you're searching for?
I just need this answer
before i let you become
my latest regret.
I wanted something else, someone else.
why couldn't you be him?
i suppose these days it's too much to ask for
to get a happy ending
to find someone to love you
or even do better than settle.
now that complacency is over,
i hope you get what you needed
and i hope that it finally makes you happy
but i pray that you wake up tomorrow
to see i'm the one that you wanted
only to realize that i've become
your latest regret.
what if i just let it go. what if i just wait, however long it takes. is it better to sit at home until he begs for more? or is it better to just accept things as they are? i mean is this really good enough? am i strong enough to take things day by day? or can i go back to the question that i have had to ask myself time and time again throughout this relationship... " do i want him because i like him or do i want him because i can't have him all the way? " i don't know. and i don't know when i will know. but i guess setting up these expectations only leave me wanting more, they leave me not trusting and frusterating with only myself to blame. how many times have i told a friend not to set up time limits for a boy without telling him? it only hurts you in the end. this i know and this i've seen but still i find myself looking forward to the months ahead and trying to see where we will be then. who we will be and what he will want from me.
can you tell me
did you find what you're looking for?
did you meet who you're searching for?
I just need this answer
before i let you become
my latest regret.
I wanted something else, someone else.
why couldn't you be him?
i suppose these days it's too much to ask for
to get a happy ending
to find someone to love you
or even do better than settle.
now that complacency is over,
i hope you get what you needed
and i hope that it finally makes you happy
but i pray that you wake up tomorrow
to see i'm the one that you wanted
only to realize that i've become
your latest regret.