Such is life
Today got to have a walk around the area that I really haven't been in to pick up the signs for the various reception desks for campus closure on Monday, seems a little late notice? Either way, none of the reception really seemed all that friendly. Like, Znuie was the only one who really seemed pleasant and I've worked with her before.
The walk was nice, especially since I don't really get to walk because of where my bus is in correlation to my building. I took the earlier stop today so I could grab coffees at LFH so I got a few block walk but otherwise, I won't walk really much again until this afternoon and that's really only a few blocks, too. But maybe today I'll walk down to one of the other stops instead? Not like I have anything going on anyway. Really ready to be able to have AM shifts consistently and then just have PM ET on certain days. I walked about a mile all the way around.
Definitely ready for the schedule to see where I'll be at next week. No doubt I'll be in a bunch of slow buildings again. Was very surprised to see Brooke at a busy building, especially after she got a write up. But maybe they're keeping her busy so she doesn't slack? Not even sure. How this all works out is entirely and totally beyond me.
Wore my blackberry colored dress today and got a lot of compliments which is nice, even some slightly deranged homeless guy said I looked nice today after he asked me if I had any change (which I didn't). The dress is really cute though I don't necessarily feel cute in it? Don't really know what I'll be wearing tomorrow. A dress, probably. Maybe the loose black one with long sleeves. I really want the collar taken in though, it's too loose. But the last time I went to the tailor it took a very long time to have my garments fixed.
I haven't been feeling depressed but I definitely have been feeling down and it's likely just from the heavy topics I've been thinking about lately. I have just been kind of here, just existing. A bit ignored, forgotten about, maybe I've just been feeling invisible? Being at slower buildings is needed but at the same time I feel like I'm not doing much which then makes me feel also useless. But I suppose that's the price of being flexible and okay with things? I'm not sure.
I'm ready for nice weather, that will help, I think or maybe it'll make it worse? I don't know. I want to go do things, have people to do them with. I don't even know what I want to go do but I want to do something. Who knows what Kevin even wants, I don't think he know or if he does know he won't admit to it or work toward it. Jen is occupied with having her baby stuff so I won't be seeing her for a while. Amanda will likely want to do things but her time management is so poor that won't ever happen.
On my own as per usual. I'll make my own fun. Or not. I don't know.
I just want to be happy.
... that's a myth.