man i love my family...NOT
as most of you who have stuck by me, know i have a kinda hate/hate relationship with my family *both sides*
last week my mom went in for surgery on her throat. now to start this off i should kinda explain something...for the last year or so her voice has been vanishing till it was barely a whisper, *that's a good and bad thing* so finally she went to the doctor and they found a lump.
so the whole time she was in the hospital i learned how she was doing when they called two times and i had to call them the rest of the time. so here i was IM'ing my stepdad tonight...it was cancer of the vocal cord and she'll have to go through radiation and chemo treatments. they were suppose to find out monday and let me know...hmmm wed. night and i find out over an IM message. yep love my family...they fucking suck.
now i'm not really sure how i feel. i know i ought to be horrified to learn that it was cancer but...i can't bring my self to be really upset about it. i do care a bit about my mom, but i can never say that i love her, *although i do manage to say it to her face sometimes* but i should be more upset but i'm not, i'm just not.
now what does this mean for me...i'm boned. both parents have had rounds of major cancer. and some how i'm not really bothered by that either. why the hell doesn't that bother me? *sighs* well such is my fucked up life.
you'd think they'd let me know how she is just to rub it in "you must pity your poor mother she's sick"
last week my mom went in for surgery on her throat. now to start this off i should kinda explain something...for the last year or so her voice has been vanishing till it was barely a whisper, *that's a good and bad thing* so finally she went to the doctor and they found a lump.
so the whole time she was in the hospital i learned how she was doing when they called two times and i had to call them the rest of the time. so here i was IM'ing my stepdad tonight...it was cancer of the vocal cord and she'll have to go through radiation and chemo treatments. they were suppose to find out monday and let me know...hmmm wed. night and i find out over an IM message. yep love my family...they fucking suck.
now i'm not really sure how i feel. i know i ought to be horrified to learn that it was cancer but...i can't bring my self to be really upset about it. i do care a bit about my mom, but i can never say that i love her, *although i do manage to say it to her face sometimes* but i should be more upset but i'm not, i'm just not.
now what does this mean for me...i'm boned. both parents have had rounds of major cancer. and some how i'm not really bothered by that either. why the hell doesn't that bother me? *sighs* well such is my fucked up life.
you'd think they'd let me know how she is just to rub it in "you must pity your poor mother she's sick"