Insomia Sucks

[misfitofthejedi]

For the majority of my life from childhood I have suffered from insomnia to varying degrees. At it's worst I remember going four days without sleep. That was in the middle of about two months of barely sleeping. Tonight I once again can't sleep. I decided I was going to get online and research my medication. Figured I might get lucky and find some info about sleep aids that were safe to take while on it. Unfortunately every single site I found with info said not to take them! Not even cold medicine that could make you drowsy. *sigh* I don't know how much longer I can do this and have such a fucked up sleep schedule. I'm exhausted and frustrated and I also found some information I did not want. My doctor said it was safe to have a baby on this medication. The medication's official site said that it has not been tested on pregnant women so I would need to be part of a research group AND I can't breast-feed and take Keppra. Now I know so many people out there are anti-breatfeeding and whatever but I'm a strong advocate for many reasons which I won't bother arguing about. So for me this is a problem. Jaundice says just don't breastfeed. I'd rather kiss a monkey's ass. I remember how healthy Monk was before I had to stop breastfeeding at 9 mos. so I could get dental work done. After that he was constantly sick. There is no way in hell I can knowingly do that to a baby. Besides breast-feeding is cheap. I'm so confused and frustrated. I feel like I'm whining and no one cares about this. Jaundice also thinks I don't need to be on the medication now that I'm not having the seizures. Funny... the med's website actually answers that question in their FAQ I'm no longer having seizures should I stop taking the medication? No because that means the medication is working. Duh.

Fuck this is frustrating (I said that ten times already didn't I?) I wish I had a way to push all this off my chest.