She's had the worst week, ever.
Lots of things I need to do. Thank God it's the weekend... but even so...
This week things almost fell apart, but they held on. And now I think it's all right. And everything's going to be fine.
Two major things have happened that I really don't want to talk about right now. All I will say is that I've lost friends, and discovered friends that I have who I can never lose.
So I'm going to talk about something else.
My painting is going okay. I've grown tired of looking at it-- so I've started two more. One of them has only an underpainting, while the other one has the base layer of the background. Hopefully I can just eye where I am going to put my character to fit well with the piece... and hopefully I won't ruin the painting.
That's always what I've been afraid of-- similar to that of inking. It's so permanent, and sometimes I'm afraid I'll screw it up...
You ever just kind of see someone-- it could be online, it could be offline, anything like that... and you just see them passing by, sitting in class, their name online... anything!!
And you just want to walk up to talk to them? ...or maybe IM them? Or something? But you don't know what. So you end up just giving them a glance. Or you just see their name online, and you never actually IM them. You can just feel their name there.
It's not like this is only one person. This is way more than one person. Like that girl in my class, I'd like to just talk to her and ask her, "Can you see if my thesis is all right?" or "...could you proofread my essay?" because she's just so good at what she does...
Or someone online, that sometimes I talk to-- but am afraid to IM them just because I have the urge to. What would we talk about then? But talking to them makes me feel giddy, or maybe happy, or something. Or maybe it's because they say really insightful things? Or joke around that's fun?
Well, there's a lot of people I'd like to talk to, but I never ever go up to approach them first. I suppose I'm just... kind of bad like that.
Is it because I want to be friends? Or closer friends? Or anything? Is it because I'm fascinated of what they're able to do?
My mood has been rather dull. I just don't want to go to school and do things anymore.
And I don't mean to be angsty or anything. So sorry about that! And don't tell me I can't apologize!
I just want to go home...
EDIT, 2:30AM: I just wanted to say, Neon, I'm very fortunate, because of you.
EDIT 2, 3:40AM: Wow! That's another horrible way to end my day. I told you this was the worst week of my life. Ha. Anyway, for those who are leaving me (since there's more than one) I hope your lives will be okay. And I hope you all become happy. I don't regret my friendship with the two of you, and I don't regret anything, period. *hugs* Goodbye, and maybe we'll meet again. For that one that knows me in real life, you can always call me and IM me, if you ever want, and to that one I know only online, you can always e-mail or IM me. Goodbye. I'll only have fond memories of the two of you.
This week things almost fell apart, but they held on. And now I think it's all right. And everything's going to be fine.
Two major things have happened that I really don't want to talk about right now. All I will say is that I've lost friends, and discovered friends that I have who I can never lose.
So I'm going to talk about something else.
My painting is going okay. I've grown tired of looking at it-- so I've started two more. One of them has only an underpainting, while the other one has the base layer of the background. Hopefully I can just eye where I am going to put my character to fit well with the piece... and hopefully I won't ruin the painting.
That's always what I've been afraid of-- similar to that of inking. It's so permanent, and sometimes I'm afraid I'll screw it up...
You ever just kind of see someone-- it could be online, it could be offline, anything like that... and you just see them passing by, sitting in class, their name online... anything!!
And you just want to walk up to talk to them? ...or maybe IM them? Or something? But you don't know what. So you end up just giving them a glance. Or you just see their name online, and you never actually IM them. You can just feel their name there.
It's not like this is only one person. This is way more than one person. Like that girl in my class, I'd like to just talk to her and ask her, "Can you see if my thesis is all right?" or "...could you proofread my essay?" because she's just so good at what she does...
Or someone online, that sometimes I talk to-- but am afraid to IM them just because I have the urge to. What would we talk about then? But talking to them makes me feel giddy, or maybe happy, or something. Or maybe it's because they say really insightful things? Or joke around that's fun?
Well, there's a lot of people I'd like to talk to, but I never ever go up to approach them first. I suppose I'm just... kind of bad like that.
Is it because I want to be friends? Or closer friends? Or anything? Is it because I'm fascinated of what they're able to do?
My mood has been rather dull. I just don't want to go to school and do things anymore.
And I don't mean to be angsty or anything. So sorry about that! And don't tell me I can't apologize!
I just want to go home...
EDIT, 2:30AM: I just wanted to say, Neon, I'm very fortunate, because of you.
EDIT 2, 3:40AM: Wow! That's another horrible way to end my day. I told you this was the worst week of my life. Ha. Anyway, for those who are leaving me (since there's more than one) I hope your lives will be okay. And I hope you all become happy. I don't regret my friendship with the two of you, and I don't regret anything, period. *hugs* Goodbye, and maybe we'll meet again. For that one that knows me in real life, you can always call me and IM me, if you ever want, and to that one I know only online, you can always e-mail or IM me. Goodbye. I'll only have fond memories of the two of you.