The ol' Brain vs Heart brawl
I haven't been able to stop thinking about the prospect of moving to Squamish.. My brain/heart are having a fistfight; Brain is all, "But you love your job. What if the money isn't as good? What if it doesn't get you as far ahead financially as you initially thought? What if it's wrong? What will you do if you give up your house and your job? Maybe you should wait until autumn..." Whereas Heart is all, "Trees! Fresh air! New people and places and things! This feels exciting!"
Sometimes you have to let go of something good in order to get something great.
In my Wildheart group there was a Tarot pull this afternoon. I made a request, and got a response:
Moi:"So, I asked the Universe for a gift, and it responded with a gobsmackingly unexpected and amazing gift... Now I'm trying to decide whether or not to take it, since it involves making some radical changes, and I'm scared!
I'd love a pull regarding this. "
Natalie: "McKinnley - A big fat YES! Ten of Pentacles. This symbolizes the pinnacle of success - Pentacles are about career, work, money, material needs, solidness, etc. Very earthy and tangible. Even before I pulled the card I felt a "HELL YES" ... obviously the path may not be the easiest or smoothest but know that this will head you down the path towards some major SUCCESS"
Iiiiiinteresting. It feels good on a personal level, but I'm concerned about leaving WR when I'm in a VERY good position there. But somehow I do feel like this will be a great career booster too, somehow, and apparently the Tarot agrees.
I've been daydreaming about Hawaii and the mini week of life I lived there, and how I want to replicate it. I love the necklace I bought on the North Shore because it looks like golden sunshine and hippie goodness!
My vision board is taking up prominence in my psyche, as I'm making a point to really look at it more often. Today I realized that there are a LOT of images set in outdoorsy, hippie, relaxed, beautiful nature. Tons of forests, trees, mountains, meadows, flowing shirts and long necklaces, cute, cozy little caravans and rooms and houses. I'm a city girl, and I love the straightforwardness of Calgary, but the earth is calling to my soul.
Jaimee sent me a photo of their house (and a glimpse of the shed/my room behind it), and it's all green wooden shingles, nestled in the woods... and I had to shake my head at the Universe's obviousness when I compared it to a photo that I stumbled across online last night and loved it so much that I set it as my desktop background: a little stone house with weathered wooden doors and shutters, surrounded by long grass and wildflowers and a tree off to the side.
Conversely, I met with Amie on Monday to talk about real estate, and I thought I was just gathering info and advice, but it turned into us talking about the specifics or what I want, and then the house-hunting was on! She sent me an email with a bunch of properties and I looked through each one carefully. My goal was to save $1000 a month this year, then start house-hunting perhaps end of 2014 or early next year. But it seems as though the ball has begun rolling already! I then spoke with Mom about my loan I still owe them, and she advised me to pay it off in full, and told me that she and Dad would put $20,000 towards my down payment, to be repaid when I sold my house in the future. Wow. That offer was unexpected, and it will put me in a position to buy sooner than later.
I'm waiting for a call from a mortgage broker today, to discuss some financial details, since getting a bank to approve a mortgage for a bartender will be no easy feat - although Oliver didn't break a sweat when Laura-Lee asked him about it.
Funny how things have a life of their own sometimes. Buying a house was an idea, even a bit of a daydream, just a week ago, and suddenly it's a fairly imminent reality.
But how will my hiatus in Squamish affect this? I don't want to stop the momentum!
On another note, I took a personality test this afternoon, and it was pretty accurate with regards to ME, particularly regarding career:
"In general, two simple things tend to be very clearly expressed in most of the careers that ISFJs decide to take. First, they need to utilise their people-sensing skills as this is one of their most important and unique strengths. Second, ISFJs need to have an opportunity to “create order from chaos” as they usually possess truly extraordinary talents in this area. If these two conditions are met, that particular career path is probably a very good choice for an ISFJ."
I most definitely have people-sensing skills, and a strongly engrained need to create order from chaos. This hit home pretty hard for me. I guess it gives me some clarity as to what I need to focus on in my business.
"A feeling type that's meticulous and analytical. Traditional, but not blinded by this, and open to change. " Yup.
I got my hair cut today, took off at least 6 inches! Lots of layers, much more rock star. In Hawaii I was all, "I'm never cutting or brushing my hair again!" but it just doesn't feel right here in Calgary, I needed it to look more edgy and wild but maintained. It feels good. I'm gonna wear my faux leather pants and motorcycle boots out to the Ship tonight.. it's G's last shift of work there, and it's his birthday tomorrow. Weee!