If only I were the me of my daydreams...

[mer_lowe]

I am sitting here in my hotel room once again realizing that I am not the girl in my daydreams. Why is it that when I am working I can be outgoing and friendly and confident (most of the time), but when it comes to being on my own I am a complete wimp? I just don't have any guts, confidence. I will often chat with strangers if I don't think there is anything on the line but for the most part I am timid. I am not the person I see my self to be or wish I were and I compare myself negatively to those around. I am better than I used to be but...

I feel I ought to be different than who I am.

In other news:
Still fighting a nagging sore throat that I am praying doesn't turn into a cold. I am done with being sick and simply don't have the time.