Teen Titans Go! "Oil Drums" Review (Spoilers)
Also reviews for the latest episode of The Flash, Arrow, the short "Heroes Vs. Villains", and the latest episodes of Gotham, iZombie, Marvel's Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D., Once Upon A Time, Transformers: Robots In Disguise, Grimm, Family Guy, 12 Monkeys, Louie, The Last Man On Earth, Bates Motel, and The Following as well as my review for Mickey Mouse Outwits The Phantom Blot from Fantagraphics books.
Upcoming reviews include The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (Blu-Ray), The Spectacular Spider-Man: The Complete Series, Phineas And Ferb: Star Wars, Big Hero 6 (Blu-Ray), Tangled, Muppets Most Wanted: Extended Edition, Lego DC Super Heroes: Justice League vs. Bizarro League, Teen Titans Go!: Appetite For Disruption, Justice League: Throne Of Atlantis, Batman vs Robin, Revolution: Season 2, Almost Human: The Complete Series, Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Season 1, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey: Extended Edition, The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug (Blu-Ray), The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug: Extended Edition, Airplane! / Airplane II: The Sequel: Double Feature, Police Squad: The Complete Series, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 2, Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie, Power Rangers Turbo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Turbo: Volume 2, Power Rangers In Space Volume 1, Power Rangers In Space: Volume 2, Power Rangers Samurai: The Complete Season, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Showdown In Dimension X, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014), Mr. Peabody & Sherman, Under The Dome: Season 2, Samurai Jack: Season 4, The Wonder Years: Season 2, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay: Part 1, Family Guy: Volume 8, and Family Guy: Volume 9.
Teen Titans Go! "Oil Drums"
I love that Raven loves Golden Girls and seems more excited than anyone to spend time with her friends. But am I the only one who thinks the references to 80's TV shows will confuse the kids in the audience? Don't get me wrong, I think Robin's obession with ALF eating the cat is funny, and even Family Guy hasn't referenced Out Of This World or Manimal. But I kind of don't think the writers should be targeting this show to 40 year olds.
Still, the sitcom main title was fun. I keep forgetting her name isn't actually Starfire.
Fun episode but I'm betting it will make the kiddies shrug. ***1/2.
Arrow "Broken Arrow"
The weird thing about Dig and Felicity's plan was that all throughout the episode I thought they were giving Oliver terrible advice. And for those two specific characters that was unprecedented. Were they BOTH being written out of character? But the writers cleverly made it so that they knew something neither Oliver nor the audience did, which made their advice the correct one after all.
Arrow and The Flash are pretty much blurring into each other at this point. I can't seem to recall another spin-off show that tied so heavily into the mothershow in such a short space of time. Weord.
Lazaruz Pit, huh? This better mean they're bringing Sara back too.
Loved Oliver being supportive of Ray. That was refreshing and shows character growth on Oliver's part.
I'm back to hating Lance again. Why? Because I'm pretty sure he knows deep down that the Arrow WAS in fact framed for the murders he was accused of. And doesn't care. And I don't think he has any right to talk to Oliver the way he did in this episode. At all.
I'll miss Roy if Colton Haynes has really left the show. But that was a good way to go out. ****.
The Flash "All-Star Team-Up"
Felicity saying that Ray was Barry's mind with Oliver's body had to have been the most mortifying thing to babble out of her mouth ever. She immediately realizes how humiliatingly embarrassing it is for all three guys, and tries to walk it back instantly. The fierceness of Felicity telling Caitlan not to tell ANYBODY about this, reminds me a bit of how vehemently Marcellus Wallace told Butch to keep what happened between them between them in Pulp Fiction. And unlike Marcellus Wallace, I think Felicity saying that out loud is DEFINITELY something to be ashamed of.
I love everybody's reactions to Ray and Felicity: "Wow, there's two of them." I am going enjoy the spin-off series.
How great was that "It's a bird! It's a plane!" joke? The Flash is the ONLY current DC show that would do a joke like that and it is appreciated.
Iris thinks Barry is being super cool for sticking up for Eddie, but I'm thinking in Barry's mind it is the very least he could do. I'm serious. Literally, The LEAST he could do. The entire mess was his fault, and since Barry IS such a nice guy, of COURSE he's going to try and fix it, even if it winds up being "Just this once." It would be out of character if he didn't. Still, I'm annoyed Iris didn't take his advice. SUPER annoyed. Iris is MUCH more annoying at this point in the series' run than she was in the first half of the season.
I like that the audience knows from the missing day episode that Caitlin and Cisco are trustworthy, even though Barry does not. How does Cisco even remember ANYTHING about the alternate timeline? That bit made no sense. Are they saying it's a premonition? Because that makes even less sense.
Felicity has a nemesis! And she drops the mic! Yay!
Great episode. ****1/2.
The Flash / Arrow "Heroes Vs. Villains"
This was ludicrous, if fun. As if Ra-'s Al Ghul and Reverse Flash engage in underground fight clubs. Right. ****.
Gotham "Beasts Of Prey"
That serial killer torturing that woman: I didn't need to see that. Who wants to see that? How is that entertaining? What part of that was I supposed to enjoy?
Not everything sucked but more sucked than it should have. I like Penguin's line reading upon promising to bring that woman's daughter home for mass. And Cat and Bruce's interrogation of Reggie was interesting until the appalling ending. Gotham pushes things way too far.
On a positive note Colm Feore is still able to give me the willies. "Give me what I want and I'll go away!"
Sucky episode of an increasingly sucky series. *.
iZombie "Liv And Let Clive"
"Brains are for closers." That belongs on a T-shirt.
Most small businesses fail. David. Anders. Is. The best.
Speaking of which, Sarah Jane Redmond still looks dynamite in a swimsuit.
I'd watch an entire show with the premise of a Kung Fu Zombie.
You can't flex fat.
That dude digs white chicks. And Liv is Moby Dick.
So much goodness. ****.
iZombie "Flight Of The Living Dead"
This is why it's good Rob Thomas has a TV show. So somebody will hire Ryan Hansen and he won't have to be homeless. Granted, he still LOOKS homeless, but that is neither here nor there.
"Shut up, or I'll eat you." That's a new one.
I love that Clive's boss is a zombie and that there are a lot more of them than we were led to believe. Explains a LOT. ****.
Marvel's Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. "Afterlife"
Dang, Deathlok! Where you been? Took 'em long enough. Coulson doesn't warn Hunter cause he wants to see his face.
I love the fact that Fitz nd Simmons just totally played Mack and Bobbi like that. That was a fine piece of theater that worked so well because it was believable that that pair was imploding. The fact that they were actually STRENGHTENING their bond makes me love this show.
I love Cal whimpering when he punched the floor. I actually thought he was gonna land that blow and from the force he had behind it he obviously did too. Ouch!
I loved the opening with the car dealer completely misreading the kind of guy Coulson is. It's SO awesome because Clark Gregg looks and acts EXACLTY like the kind of mid-life crisis, middel-aged, nebbish guy he was trying to hustle. One of the reasons Coulson is so cool is that it doesn't LOOK like he is, so his enemies underestimate him. And boy did they ever tonight.
This second SHIELD plot is a bust. I think it was only set-up to set up the forthcoming spin-off and that there won't actually be a "War for SHIELD" coming. Things are gonna deescalate on their own and the audience is gonna be pissed. This is something the latter Star Trek sequels always did instead of expensive spaceship battles and it will be no less annoying here.
All right. I liked more than I didn't. ***1/2.
Marvel's Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. "Melinda"
Of course you knew the Calvary story would be a disappointment. The only question was how big of one it was. Not big. It was all right. I can live with it. Doesn't exactly excuse May's horrible behavior but it explains it a little.
The dinner scene at the end with Skye's family was great and I absolutely adored the tag of Fitz learning how to lose a tail from Coulson and Hunter. That kid is going to be okay.
I look forward to next week and Age Of Ultron. ***1/2.
Once Upon A Time "Heart Of Gold"
As magnificent, and unexpected, and unpredictable, and awesome as the "Zelina is Marian" twist is, I'm gonna do it: I'm calling retcon. Big time. There is NO way this was the original plan. None. I am willing to bet Marian's behavior since she's been in Storybrooke does NOT hold up to scutiny. Just the fact that she sort of made peace with Regina makes no sense. If it was Zelina she would be wanting to twist the knife. I'm sure the writers had a great idea at one point mid-season and thought "It ALMOST fits! Maybe the viewers will forgive it." I do forgive it. Bit it doesn't completely fit. Not by a long-shot.
Will Scarlet gets around, doesn't he? And yet he STILL hasn't had anything of note yet to do this season. Why is his actor a series regular and Robin's isn't? Sheesh.
The cliffhanger was perfect. Once is the kind of show that would have Regina answer that she would sacrifice the savior so I was pleasantly shocked they left her answer open-ended. That's good storytelling. Which this show has completely lacked this season and almost always with the character of Regina from the very start. The bigger dread is not knowing instead of being made crazy that Regina slipped. Sure, that'll cause buzz. But it does NOT give the viewer the knot in the stomach I now have. Answering that particular question immediately does no-one, writers or viewer, any favors.
Bad things? Snow's childish "We've changed!" Nah nah nah. Remember what I said last week about Snow always trying to pretend her LAST sin was the last one until it wasm't? Their behavior since Maleficent has been back has been deplorable. They're asking Emma: "Quit judging us for something we did five minutes ago! You're living in the past! It's been five minutes! We're better people now! It is unfair how uncool you are being about this!" Very Homer Simpson. And unlike him too, because I actually forgive Homer for it. And when Snow and Charming say something that stupid, it isn't actually funny.
Also, I have ALWAYS hated the moral that it is okay to steal if you are doing it on behalf of the less fortunate. Yeah, in this particular circumstance, the sheriff had it coming, but that is NOT a hard and fast rule I am comfortable with. I think it is wrong for a starving man to steal a loaf of bread for his starving family. The man who baked the bread has a family too, and did nothing to deserve being made poorer due to somebody else's circumstance. Stealing from the dude who threatens to Julian Assange-rape your wife* is an entirely different context than most theft scenarios. I forgive it though, but it has always bugged me about Robin Hood. You're telling me ALL of the wealthy people he robbed were douchebags, and not simply people trying to live their lives as best they can whether they were rich or poor? I believe that fable about as much as I believe that the Punisher never kills an innocent. I.E. not at all.
This was a fabulous episode that I'm betting will NOT hold up to a repeat viewing. ****1/2.
*Yes, I just called Julian Assange a rapist. Because by any reasonable definition, he is. Just what he's admitted to is rape. The fact that his fans try to say a scenario where he threatens to kick the women lving his apartment out on the street homeless if they don't have sex with him is consensual is effed up. ANY reasonable metric, that's rape. Full stop. It is one step away from driving a woman into the middle of nowhere and threatening to leave her on the side of the road unless she has sex with the guy in the car. There is no choice involved in that scenario and no choice equals rape. And it disturbs me greatly that liberals are the people defending Assange about this.
Off-topic. Next review.
Transformers: Robots In Disguise "More Than Meets The Eye"
Calling it now: this show sucks. The animation is spectacularly bad and the only character I give a crud about is Bumblebee, and that's only due to him appearing on an entirely different show.
And may I comment on the Autobots cheering at the kiddie football game? Transformers Prime would do lame stuff like that occasionally. But not on a good week. It was a rarity and this stuff seems to happen on this show every episode.
Also Grimlock's camo mode sucks. The producers did NOT think ahead when including him on the roster.
On the other hand, Bisque reminded me a bit of Roberto from Futurama. Him, I'll keep.
This show is doomed. *.
Grimm "Hibernaculum"
I'm over this show. I really am. I'm just disgusted at this point. I hate what they're doing to Juliet and I hate even more that they are trying to get the audience to hate her for it. Juliet is the victim and Nick is the villain. The show pretending any differently is dishonest. I'd be inclined to praise the Monroe and Rosalee scenes in the episode if they didn't wind up being exactly as judgmental as Nick when learning the truth about Juliet. Grimm used to be a good show that had the potential for greatness. Now it is a lousy show that has wasted all its potential. *.
Family Guy "JOLO"
I always wondered why Humpty Dumpty went to the king's horses and men before he went to the doctor.
Apparently Donna's Auntie Momma is in town. God, that was an offensive character.
Now I know how I want my funeral. Seriously. I hate Peter Griffin with a passion but that is pretty much the best funeral anybody could have cooked up. The fact that it annoyed his family so much was the best part about it. One last piece of performance art before you go.
Can you believe Quagmire was grousing that Joe should have taken them to Disneyworld and shot himself in the room? This is precisely why Brian should NOT be bugged by his hatred. Glen Quagmire is NOT a better person than Brian Grffin. They're both horrible, but I think by about an equal amount.
That joke with the old-timey bikes and the rake was funny too as were the adult kickball players. I've never actually MET an adult kickball player, but I'd have to imagine they would be exactly as horrible as the episode implied.
Stewie was spot-on about the attention seeking reason Brian was wearing a beard. That dude can NOT figure out his own identity. Stewie thinks it's cute, but I find it a bit insufferable.
I'm glad they gave Joe the hero moment at the end. He really should be portrayed that way more often, instead being the butt of handicapped jokes. That's probably why they wrote the episode in the first place. Good for them.
I'm surprised at how decent this episode was. Family Guy has been having a terrible season but this was pretty good. ****.
12 Monkeys "Arms Of Mine"
This series has been delivering five star episode after five star episode. This finale was not one of them. It was great, don't get me wrong, but until I know it's place in the larger context of the series I am not quite sure what to make of it.
What I CAN say is that the show seems to be channeling Twin Peaks and the second season finale for Millennium for the plague and Red Forest. Very cool imagery.
What I found most interesting was the idea that Cole actually changed something the evil woman said was set in stone. He saved Ramsay's life and I think blew a hole in the predestination jive that woman was spewing. The cool thing about this show is that they've established stuff CAN be changed which sets it apart from the movie.
As for Aaron, I would have liked a better end for him, i.e. a worse one. I seriously think he deserves to witness the consequences of his evil actions. Jennifer is still a bit hard to figure out, but the same is true for Ramsay.
In my head I kept thinking if Cole and Ramsay got in a room and talked things out, things would deescalate on their own. And I was right. I am very curious where they are going to take Ramsay. If he isn't the witness, who is? What is the purpose of the actual 12 Monkeys? Why are they called that? Why is their skin blue? About the best thing I can say about the season finale is that the show has been renewed. I'm estactic for that fact.
I'll have a better feel for this rewatching it on Blu-Ray. ****.
Louie "Pot Luck"
Do you know why I love Louie? He is too dumb to imagine having anal sex with a 9 month old pregnant woman would end any other way. And do you know what? I don't feel sorry for the lesbian couple at all. I mean, Louie was genuinely nice to that woman, and it is clear that couple has been beating down her morale one snotty line at a time. One of the woman in the couple gives OTHER people permission to touch the pregnant woman's stomach. The mother may not be related to the kid, but it is totally anti-feminist that she is being treated as a baby farm. Louie's right. Sometimes things don't go as you planned. Not everything is about that screaming lesbian.
I loved Louie just refusing to engage in a game of passive agressiveness with a hostile party guest, and simply told him he was better than him. That's what the guy was fishing for, right? He was LOOKING to be offended, and Louie's like "I'll get the confrontation over with immediately because this douche ultimately ain't worth the time."
You KNEW something terrible was going to happen in that first apartment, and I'm proud to say cult was my first guess. I'm surprised it took Louie as long as it did to cotton on. I also predicted him forgetting the fried chicken. I loved his reaction to one of the guests at the real pot luck complimenting the KFC. He had NO reaction to it. What was he gonna do, take the compliment?
Great premiere. ****1/2.
The Last Man On Earth "The Do-Over"
Enough. Ugh. Do you know the worst thing? This episode pretty much proved that Phil's "love" for Melissa is entirely superficial and only predicated on her magnificent looks. And the "older woman / black woman" thing was beyond insulting. About the only good thing about this show is whenever Phil is punished for his horrid behavior. But that doesn't happen enough.
Do you know what I liked? Melissa seriously hates Phil, even before the reveal at the end. I can't believe Phil thought he could have pulled that off. The only way the do-over would have worked is if he took off with thos two women. That would make him horrible but it would certainly involve less hurt feelings. Phil isn't just cruel and selfish. He is stupid. *.
The Last Man On Earth "Pranks For Nothin'"
I think Melissa had the best insight about how horribly Phil disappointed Todd: "He really liked you." That killed me. Because it was true. And unearned. And a trust that was abused. The worst part is that Phil STILL refused to take responsibility. His whole prank excuse and then insane twin brother scheme shows that he does NOT think very much of his former friends. As he's lying on the pool table wondering why his friends refuse to give him the benefit of the doubt I screamed at the TV "That's ALL they have been giving you!" I'm glad everybody finally was willing to hear what Melissa was trying to tell them. To her credit, she didn't rub in to Todd. And she totally could have.
Phil's confession at the end was too little, too late. I think the only reason Phil still has a chance in the community is because Todd is the only other man, and almost certainly does not want to breed with anyone but Melissa. But if another dude shows up, I predict Phil will be persona non-grata. His only use to the community is his genetic uniqueness. I'm betting even ONE more guy would make everybody else kick him out for good.
What I hate most about Phil is that he automatically damaged Carol's relationship with Gail and Erica. And with only six known people on Earth that is a HUGE sin. Is the show going to start getting into politics the more people that show up? That would be very interesting to me. For some reason, the more people show up, the more interesting the show is.
I have to say, even though I hate Phil so much, I like the other characters enough that if the show is renewed I will stick with it for another season at least. The show has gotten good even if the main character is reprehensible. Because at least now everybody knows it. I will also give it something else: it makes an impression. I'm still thinking about this episode hours later and I REALLY want to know what happens next. I don't necessarily LIKE watching the show, but I'm absorbed by it anyways, probably due to Todd and Melissa. That's a good thing. ****.
Bates Motel "Norma Louise"
That look on Dylan's face upon seeing Norman in Norma's robe said one thing to me: "I'm in over my head."
I don't think even NORMA is aware that Norman is that specifically messed up. I have to conclude that the romance might be over for Emma and Norman. It might not, but it would be perfectly understable is Emma lost every single bit of desire she ever felt for him upon seeing him in that state. The look he gave Caleb at the end was bone-chilling. "MINE!"
I'd feel more sympathetic about Norma's plight if she wasn't such a bad mother. She claims that because she's a parent she doesn't get to not talk to her kid's father because he raped her. And yet, that is PRECISELY what she did. I'll give her this: she understands the ugly moral of The Giving Tree better than that book's legion of misguided fans. The Giving Tree is a chump and the Boy is a taker and an abuser. That's it. There is no higher moral than that. I get the "Unconditial love" thing, but when the person you love starts hacking off your limbs, maybe it's okay to stop loving them. That is a condition I don't think ANYONE should have a problem meeting. Not dismemberinng your loved one is pretty much the absolute least you can demand out of a relationship.
The therapist is all like "I'll lose my license", and Norma doesn't care. I hate that she went to the car with that guy, and then did what she did, and I resent that the writers are trying to make me think that she is a tease. That is not something I need to think about the character to make the ending of when she inevitably spurns Norman stronger. It would played exactly as well if they never wrote that scene.
I was shocked that Romero killed Kenny Johnson, but only because I thought he was too weak in that moment to do it. Johnson was an IDIOT to threaten Romero like that, especially alone. He thinks he's giving him a no-win ultimatum and being David Xanatos. Well, killing Johnson didn't actually SOLVE the problem for Romero. But it SIMPLIFIED it. Big time. Can't believe Johnson's character did not see the VERY gaping hole in the plan of him being crucial to Romero's survival. Darwin Award.
This show is nuts. Four stars just for Romero killing that guy. ****.
The Following "Flesh & Blood"
I'm not going to say that nosy woman earned a Darwin Award and deserved to be killed. But there is usually a very specific reason you should not poke your nose into somebody else's business, especially someone you don't know or trust. Big mistake.
By the way, Ryan was right to kick that dude out of his house. I don't even agree with Ryan slightly about the death penalty, but it was the absolute wrong thing to do in Ryan's own house after the trauma he had been through. The guy was looking to be a jerk.
That whole ending killed me. Theo is such a scumbag. I cannot wait to see him brought down. ***1/2.
Walt Disney's Mickey Mouse "Outwits The Phantom Blot" By Floyd Gottfredson
My childhood died after reading this. I am now an older and wiser person, but also a markedly more unhappy one too. This volume of Mickey Mouse stories contains a couple of stories so full-stop racist that I have to just out and out say I am no longer a Floyd Gottfredson fan. Now I can't stand him. And frankly, I don't think any other Disney fan should either.
It is true that "Mickey Mouse Outwits The Phantom Blot" is the single greatest Mickey Mouse story ever told, comic or animated. But from what I gather D.W. Griffith also did a LOT of great films besides Birth of a Nation. But because Birth of a Nation is KKK propaganda I have no interest in seeing them. "Phantom Blot", "Blaggard Castle", and "Island In The Sky" are pretty much perfect stories. But if I had a choice that if they never existed neither would "Mickey Mouse Meets Robinson Crusoe", I'd make that trade in a heartbeat.
The essayists in the accompanying featurettes pretty much admit how horrible this story, is but lay the blame that it was just a sign of the times, and that people who knew Gottfredon said he wasn't personally racist. After reading that story I was like "Why are they even trying to defend that guy? Why even bother?" Wouldn't Occam's Razor imply that if a guy wrote a bunch of stories straight out of minstrel shows that portrayed all black people as apes, savages, and cannibals, that the person actually believed that? If it was just a few instances like Carl Barks, I could look past it, but Gottfredson is pretty much unending ugliness sprinkled with a few good stories in between. I would actually argue that there are many more ugly stories than outright good ones. With Fantagraphics reprinting these stories unedited I can't even enjoy many of the stories I loved as a kid that the Gladstone Editors wisely trimmed out the offensive parts of. Because now I see them as they were originally intended and they suck.
The essayists are SUCH Floyd Gottfredson fans that it is hard to reconcile that they all agree some of this stuff is completely out of bounds, and yet... for some reason, they are still fans. For me? Mickey Mouse comics are not the hill I choose to die on. Why should I continue to defend the indefensible? Maybe instead of instinctively defending them because I loved them as a kid, I admit that Floyd Gottfredson was a lousy storyteller and a lousier human being. Maybe I have enough integrity to acknowledge that me defending Gottfredson over the years was wrong, and that there is nothing he could possibly do to repair how I see him now. The essayists seem to be willing to look past Gottfredson's intense racism to enjoy the few stories where that wasn't a problem at all. I'm not willing to do that. Not anymore. Collection Overall: 0.
"Mighty Whale Hunter":
This is the best Gottfredson story I never read. The message is ANTI-whaling and there is a lot of action and great artwork. Mickey is especially clever in it too, first by getting the Captain to admit his room wasn't TOO messy after all because he had been the only one in it, and then by correctly surmising the female whale would follow them back to the ship because she'd want to eat them. There are a ton of Gottfredson stories better than this. But this is the best one I hadn't ever read before. All of the other "new" finds were pretty much abhorrent. This was great. ****.
"The Plumber's Helper":
A lot about this story bothers me but I'm having a tough time putting my finger on it. It seems vaguely anti-union, but Gottfredson is clever enough to hide his tracks using dogwhistles (for the most part). It is just REALLY disheartening to see the guy who used to write such empowering stories for the little guy turn into a conservative crank against the New Deal and so-called welfare mooches. The essayist says Gottfredson turned cynical. That's a polite way to say "into a rightwing nutjob." It is REALLY hard to excuse Gottfredson's unending racism when we see he turned on the Democratic Party pretty much the exact same time as the Dixiecrats did. The editors want me to think that Gottfredson grew jaded. I think Gottfredson has ALWAYS been like this but only turned against FDR and the New Deal once he worried it was helping "Those people." Gottfredson wrote some of the greatest Mickey Mouse stories of all time, and is second only to Carl Barks in the impact they made to Disney Comics history. But just based on rereading this stuff it is quite clear he was NOT a very nice person. **.
"Mickey Mouse Meets Robinson Crusoe & Unhappy Campers"
Soul-crushing. Every page further I read the Robinson Crusoe story the more sick to my stomach I felt. The essayist says Gottfredson's peers claimed he was no racist, but you simply cannot come up with the ideas in this story unless you have the same hatred in your heart as a KKK member. I'm starting to rethink Gottfredson's entire output. The man had a VERY dark and ugly side to him that was not apparent in the cleaned up Gladstone reprints I grew up with as a kid. A part of my childhood died reading this. I will never get it back or look at Gottfredson the same way again. It seems inexplicable that this story is paired up with the adorable Unhappy Campers which is a story I remember reading on summer vacation as a kid and loving. We always wanted a complete set of Gottfredson's work. Maybe we shouldn't have. Overall: 0.
Mickey Mouse Meets Robinson Crusoe: That was ugly. It hurt to read. It is without a doubt the single worst Disney comic book story I have ever read. By far. And it isn't even a contest. 0.
Unhappy Campers: For some strange reason I couldn't enjoy the story immediately following that disgusting Crusoe one. And I loved it as a kid. I always loved Goofy's threat of wanting to get his hands on the fellow who wrote that book and Morty and Ferdie's new character designs are adorable. I set the book down after this because I wanted to take a little bit of time away from it before rereading Phantom Blot. I didn't need that on my mind when I read it. ****.
"Mickey Mouse Outwits The Phantom Blot":
Love him or hate him, there is no denying that Floyd Gottfredson wrote the very best Mickey Mouse story of all time. Barks and Don Rosa have come up with a few stories set in the Duckverse that were better. But there has NEVER been a better Mouseverse one. Never. Not one. The entire story is kind of ghastly to be honest, especially the Blot's insistence at the end that he has a gentle heart because he can't stomach witnessing his gruesome deathtraps to their conclusions. That is REALLY psychologically twisted and seems better suited to a rogue of Batman's rather than Mickey Mouse. But WHAT a rogue. I'm going to say something controversial (and I KNOW Don Rosa will disagree). Carl Barks never came up with a villain as good as The Phantom Blot. Never. Magica De Spell, The Beagle Boys, and Flintheart Glomgold each have their charms, but in every single one of their adventures, they are less interesting than Scrooge and Donald themselves. I cannot WAIT to see the Blot pop up and every time we see his horrifically scary character design my heart beats a little faster. That NEVER happens with Scrooge rogues. The only other fictional character I can think of off the top of my head with that sustained level of perfect awesomeness is Beetlejuice in the movie Beetlejuice. But the Blot is amazing. The deathtraps were ingenius in their simplicity. I also loved that none of them fudged the weird premise of the Blot constructing traps that made you kill yourself rather than have the Blot do it himself. They didn't cheat even once (even with the sleeping powder!), and Gottfredson probably could have gotten away with it. But the Blot's sick motives are entirely consistent. The one bad thing about the story is that whenever Mickey went back to Peg-Leg Pete after this it was now a let-down. Pete has ALWAYS been a lame villain (especially since he's Mickey's Big Bad) but after the Blot he is wholly inadequate, and the fact that he is used so often is quite embarrassing. Frankly, most of Gottfredson's output is embarrassing, but the fact that a villain as great as the Blot came and went just made every single lame Peg-Leg Pete story that much less special. *****.
"The Miracle Master":
Good and bad. The bad: racism. Much more than there was when Gladstone edited out the offensive bits when I first read it. Also, Gottfredson seems to be taking more swipes at the ungrateful poor and the New Deal. That is just unpleasant. The good: the "It was all a dream" ending was nowhere NEAR as annoying as the essayists claim. As the story got more surreal it seemed less of a way for Gottfredson to buy his way out of it, and more of the most appropriate and fitting end ever. I also really liked the joke of the guy who slept on a bed of nails complaining that his wife ate crackers in bed. That was funny. ***.
"An Education For Thursday":
The essayists claim this story seems to be an apology of sorts by Gottfredson for the Crusoe story. Gottfredson can stuff his apology. If anything this is even MORE offensive because Gottfredson actually thinks he's being complimentary. Minnie calls Thursday an "ape", Mickey tries to sell him to the freak show, and the threat of a concentration camp is looming for him and Mickey. I'm not even joking about that last bit. It is actually in the story. Dave Barry is not making this up. If there is an afterlife, I hope Gottfredson is burning in hell for the amount of small children he indoctrinated into the depths of his hatred and racism. He normalized this stuff and it sickens me how much Disney has cleaned up his reputation amongst the public. His output is pretty much indefensible. 0.
Behind The Scenes: The Blot Thickens
These are the Blot scenes I grew up with as a kid. Now seeing the original story in this volume, I finally realize how absolutely inferior they are. **.
Upcoming reviews include The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (Blu-Ray), The Spectacular Spider-Man: The Complete Series, Phineas And Ferb: Star Wars, Big Hero 6 (Blu-Ray), Tangled, Muppets Most Wanted: Extended Edition, Lego DC Super Heroes: Justice League vs. Bizarro League, Teen Titans Go!: Appetite For Disruption, Justice League: Throne Of Atlantis, Batman vs Robin, Revolution: Season 2, Almost Human: The Complete Series, Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Season 1, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey: Extended Edition, The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug (Blu-Ray), The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug: Extended Edition, Airplane! / Airplane II: The Sequel: Double Feature, Police Squad: The Complete Series, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 2, Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie, Power Rangers Turbo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Turbo: Volume 2, Power Rangers In Space Volume 1, Power Rangers In Space: Volume 2, Power Rangers Samurai: The Complete Season, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Showdown In Dimension X, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014), Mr. Peabody & Sherman, Under The Dome: Season 2, Samurai Jack: Season 4, The Wonder Years: Season 2, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay: Part 1, Family Guy: Volume 8, and Family Guy: Volume 9.
Teen Titans Go! "Oil Drums"
I love that Raven loves Golden Girls and seems more excited than anyone to spend time with her friends. But am I the only one who thinks the references to 80's TV shows will confuse the kids in the audience? Don't get me wrong, I think Robin's obession with ALF eating the cat is funny, and even Family Guy hasn't referenced Out Of This World or Manimal. But I kind of don't think the writers should be targeting this show to 40 year olds.
Still, the sitcom main title was fun. I keep forgetting her name isn't actually Starfire.
Fun episode but I'm betting it will make the kiddies shrug. ***1/2.
Arrow "Broken Arrow"
The weird thing about Dig and Felicity's plan was that all throughout the episode I thought they were giving Oliver terrible advice. And for those two specific characters that was unprecedented. Were they BOTH being written out of character? But the writers cleverly made it so that they knew something neither Oliver nor the audience did, which made their advice the correct one after all.
Arrow and The Flash are pretty much blurring into each other at this point. I can't seem to recall another spin-off show that tied so heavily into the mothershow in such a short space of time. Weord.
Lazaruz Pit, huh? This better mean they're bringing Sara back too.
Loved Oliver being supportive of Ray. That was refreshing and shows character growth on Oliver's part.
I'm back to hating Lance again. Why? Because I'm pretty sure he knows deep down that the Arrow WAS in fact framed for the murders he was accused of. And doesn't care. And I don't think he has any right to talk to Oliver the way he did in this episode. At all.
I'll miss Roy if Colton Haynes has really left the show. But that was a good way to go out. ****.
The Flash "All-Star Team-Up"
Felicity saying that Ray was Barry's mind with Oliver's body had to have been the most mortifying thing to babble out of her mouth ever. She immediately realizes how humiliatingly embarrassing it is for all three guys, and tries to walk it back instantly. The fierceness of Felicity telling Caitlan not to tell ANYBODY about this, reminds me a bit of how vehemently Marcellus Wallace told Butch to keep what happened between them between them in Pulp Fiction. And unlike Marcellus Wallace, I think Felicity saying that out loud is DEFINITELY something to be ashamed of.
I love everybody's reactions to Ray and Felicity: "Wow, there's two of them." I am going enjoy the spin-off series.
How great was that "It's a bird! It's a plane!" joke? The Flash is the ONLY current DC show that would do a joke like that and it is appreciated.
Iris thinks Barry is being super cool for sticking up for Eddie, but I'm thinking in Barry's mind it is the very least he could do. I'm serious. Literally, The LEAST he could do. The entire mess was his fault, and since Barry IS such a nice guy, of COURSE he's going to try and fix it, even if it winds up being "Just this once." It would be out of character if he didn't. Still, I'm annoyed Iris didn't take his advice. SUPER annoyed. Iris is MUCH more annoying at this point in the series' run than she was in the first half of the season.
I like that the audience knows from the missing day episode that Caitlin and Cisco are trustworthy, even though Barry does not. How does Cisco even remember ANYTHING about the alternate timeline? That bit made no sense. Are they saying it's a premonition? Because that makes even less sense.
Felicity has a nemesis! And she drops the mic! Yay!
Great episode. ****1/2.
The Flash / Arrow "Heroes Vs. Villains"
This was ludicrous, if fun. As if Ra-'s Al Ghul and Reverse Flash engage in underground fight clubs. Right. ****.
Gotham "Beasts Of Prey"
That serial killer torturing that woman: I didn't need to see that. Who wants to see that? How is that entertaining? What part of that was I supposed to enjoy?
Not everything sucked but more sucked than it should have. I like Penguin's line reading upon promising to bring that woman's daughter home for mass. And Cat and Bruce's interrogation of Reggie was interesting until the appalling ending. Gotham pushes things way too far.
On a positive note Colm Feore is still able to give me the willies. "Give me what I want and I'll go away!"
Sucky episode of an increasingly sucky series. *.
iZombie "Liv And Let Clive"
"Brains are for closers." That belongs on a T-shirt.
Most small businesses fail. David. Anders. Is. The best.
Speaking of which, Sarah Jane Redmond still looks dynamite in a swimsuit.
I'd watch an entire show with the premise of a Kung Fu Zombie.
You can't flex fat.
That dude digs white chicks. And Liv is Moby Dick.
So much goodness. ****.
iZombie "Flight Of The Living Dead"
This is why it's good Rob Thomas has a TV show. So somebody will hire Ryan Hansen and he won't have to be homeless. Granted, he still LOOKS homeless, but that is neither here nor there.
"Shut up, or I'll eat you." That's a new one.
I love that Clive's boss is a zombie and that there are a lot more of them than we were led to believe. Explains a LOT. ****.
Marvel's Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. "Afterlife"
Dang, Deathlok! Where you been? Took 'em long enough. Coulson doesn't warn Hunter cause he wants to see his face.
I love the fact that Fitz nd Simmons just totally played Mack and Bobbi like that. That was a fine piece of theater that worked so well because it was believable that that pair was imploding. The fact that they were actually STRENGHTENING their bond makes me love this show.
I love Cal whimpering when he punched the floor. I actually thought he was gonna land that blow and from the force he had behind it he obviously did too. Ouch!
I loved the opening with the car dealer completely misreading the kind of guy Coulson is. It's SO awesome because Clark Gregg looks and acts EXACLTY like the kind of mid-life crisis, middel-aged, nebbish guy he was trying to hustle. One of the reasons Coulson is so cool is that it doesn't LOOK like he is, so his enemies underestimate him. And boy did they ever tonight.
This second SHIELD plot is a bust. I think it was only set-up to set up the forthcoming spin-off and that there won't actually be a "War for SHIELD" coming. Things are gonna deescalate on their own and the audience is gonna be pissed. This is something the latter Star Trek sequels always did instead of expensive spaceship battles and it will be no less annoying here.
All right. I liked more than I didn't. ***1/2.
Marvel's Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. "Melinda"
Of course you knew the Calvary story would be a disappointment. The only question was how big of one it was. Not big. It was all right. I can live with it. Doesn't exactly excuse May's horrible behavior but it explains it a little.
The dinner scene at the end with Skye's family was great and I absolutely adored the tag of Fitz learning how to lose a tail from Coulson and Hunter. That kid is going to be okay.
I look forward to next week and Age Of Ultron. ***1/2.
Once Upon A Time "Heart Of Gold"
As magnificent, and unexpected, and unpredictable, and awesome as the "Zelina is Marian" twist is, I'm gonna do it: I'm calling retcon. Big time. There is NO way this was the original plan. None. I am willing to bet Marian's behavior since she's been in Storybrooke does NOT hold up to scutiny. Just the fact that she sort of made peace with Regina makes no sense. If it was Zelina she would be wanting to twist the knife. I'm sure the writers had a great idea at one point mid-season and thought "It ALMOST fits! Maybe the viewers will forgive it." I do forgive it. Bit it doesn't completely fit. Not by a long-shot.
Will Scarlet gets around, doesn't he? And yet he STILL hasn't had anything of note yet to do this season. Why is his actor a series regular and Robin's isn't? Sheesh.
The cliffhanger was perfect. Once is the kind of show that would have Regina answer that she would sacrifice the savior so I was pleasantly shocked they left her answer open-ended. That's good storytelling. Which this show has completely lacked this season and almost always with the character of Regina from the very start. The bigger dread is not knowing instead of being made crazy that Regina slipped. Sure, that'll cause buzz. But it does NOT give the viewer the knot in the stomach I now have. Answering that particular question immediately does no-one, writers or viewer, any favors.
Bad things? Snow's childish "We've changed!" Nah nah nah. Remember what I said last week about Snow always trying to pretend her LAST sin was the last one until it wasm't? Their behavior since Maleficent has been back has been deplorable. They're asking Emma: "Quit judging us for something we did five minutes ago! You're living in the past! It's been five minutes! We're better people now! It is unfair how uncool you are being about this!" Very Homer Simpson. And unlike him too, because I actually forgive Homer for it. And when Snow and Charming say something that stupid, it isn't actually funny.
Also, I have ALWAYS hated the moral that it is okay to steal if you are doing it on behalf of the less fortunate. Yeah, in this particular circumstance, the sheriff had it coming, but that is NOT a hard and fast rule I am comfortable with. I think it is wrong for a starving man to steal a loaf of bread for his starving family. The man who baked the bread has a family too, and did nothing to deserve being made poorer due to somebody else's circumstance. Stealing from the dude who threatens to Julian Assange-rape your wife* is an entirely different context than most theft scenarios. I forgive it though, but it has always bugged me about Robin Hood. You're telling me ALL of the wealthy people he robbed were douchebags, and not simply people trying to live their lives as best they can whether they were rich or poor? I believe that fable about as much as I believe that the Punisher never kills an innocent. I.E. not at all.
This was a fabulous episode that I'm betting will NOT hold up to a repeat viewing. ****1/2.
*Yes, I just called Julian Assange a rapist. Because by any reasonable definition, he is. Just what he's admitted to is rape. The fact that his fans try to say a scenario where he threatens to kick the women lving his apartment out on the street homeless if they don't have sex with him is consensual is effed up. ANY reasonable metric, that's rape. Full stop. It is one step away from driving a woman into the middle of nowhere and threatening to leave her on the side of the road unless she has sex with the guy in the car. There is no choice involved in that scenario and no choice equals rape. And it disturbs me greatly that liberals are the people defending Assange about this.
Off-topic. Next review.
Transformers: Robots In Disguise "More Than Meets The Eye"
Calling it now: this show sucks. The animation is spectacularly bad and the only character I give a crud about is Bumblebee, and that's only due to him appearing on an entirely different show.
And may I comment on the Autobots cheering at the kiddie football game? Transformers Prime would do lame stuff like that occasionally. But not on a good week. It was a rarity and this stuff seems to happen on this show every episode.
Also Grimlock's camo mode sucks. The producers did NOT think ahead when including him on the roster.
On the other hand, Bisque reminded me a bit of Roberto from Futurama. Him, I'll keep.
This show is doomed. *.
Grimm "Hibernaculum"
I'm over this show. I really am. I'm just disgusted at this point. I hate what they're doing to Juliet and I hate even more that they are trying to get the audience to hate her for it. Juliet is the victim and Nick is the villain. The show pretending any differently is dishonest. I'd be inclined to praise the Monroe and Rosalee scenes in the episode if they didn't wind up being exactly as judgmental as Nick when learning the truth about Juliet. Grimm used to be a good show that had the potential for greatness. Now it is a lousy show that has wasted all its potential. *.
Family Guy "JOLO"
I always wondered why Humpty Dumpty went to the king's horses and men before he went to the doctor.
Apparently Donna's Auntie Momma is in town. God, that was an offensive character.
Now I know how I want my funeral. Seriously. I hate Peter Griffin with a passion but that is pretty much the best funeral anybody could have cooked up. The fact that it annoyed his family so much was the best part about it. One last piece of performance art before you go.
Can you believe Quagmire was grousing that Joe should have taken them to Disneyworld and shot himself in the room? This is precisely why Brian should NOT be bugged by his hatred. Glen Quagmire is NOT a better person than Brian Grffin. They're both horrible, but I think by about an equal amount.
That joke with the old-timey bikes and the rake was funny too as were the adult kickball players. I've never actually MET an adult kickball player, but I'd have to imagine they would be exactly as horrible as the episode implied.
Stewie was spot-on about the attention seeking reason Brian was wearing a beard. That dude can NOT figure out his own identity. Stewie thinks it's cute, but I find it a bit insufferable.
I'm glad they gave Joe the hero moment at the end. He really should be portrayed that way more often, instead being the butt of handicapped jokes. That's probably why they wrote the episode in the first place. Good for them.
I'm surprised at how decent this episode was. Family Guy has been having a terrible season but this was pretty good. ****.
12 Monkeys "Arms Of Mine"
This series has been delivering five star episode after five star episode. This finale was not one of them. It was great, don't get me wrong, but until I know it's place in the larger context of the series I am not quite sure what to make of it.
What I CAN say is that the show seems to be channeling Twin Peaks and the second season finale for Millennium for the plague and Red Forest. Very cool imagery.
What I found most interesting was the idea that Cole actually changed something the evil woman said was set in stone. He saved Ramsay's life and I think blew a hole in the predestination jive that woman was spewing. The cool thing about this show is that they've established stuff CAN be changed which sets it apart from the movie.
As for Aaron, I would have liked a better end for him, i.e. a worse one. I seriously think he deserves to witness the consequences of his evil actions. Jennifer is still a bit hard to figure out, but the same is true for Ramsay.
In my head I kept thinking if Cole and Ramsay got in a room and talked things out, things would deescalate on their own. And I was right. I am very curious where they are going to take Ramsay. If he isn't the witness, who is? What is the purpose of the actual 12 Monkeys? Why are they called that? Why is their skin blue? About the best thing I can say about the season finale is that the show has been renewed. I'm estactic for that fact.
I'll have a better feel for this rewatching it on Blu-Ray. ****.
Louie "Pot Luck"
Do you know why I love Louie? He is too dumb to imagine having anal sex with a 9 month old pregnant woman would end any other way. And do you know what? I don't feel sorry for the lesbian couple at all. I mean, Louie was genuinely nice to that woman, and it is clear that couple has been beating down her morale one snotty line at a time. One of the woman in the couple gives OTHER people permission to touch the pregnant woman's stomach. The mother may not be related to the kid, but it is totally anti-feminist that she is being treated as a baby farm. Louie's right. Sometimes things don't go as you planned. Not everything is about that screaming lesbian.
I loved Louie just refusing to engage in a game of passive agressiveness with a hostile party guest, and simply told him he was better than him. That's what the guy was fishing for, right? He was LOOKING to be offended, and Louie's like "I'll get the confrontation over with immediately because this douche ultimately ain't worth the time."
You KNEW something terrible was going to happen in that first apartment, and I'm proud to say cult was my first guess. I'm surprised it took Louie as long as it did to cotton on. I also predicted him forgetting the fried chicken. I loved his reaction to one of the guests at the real pot luck complimenting the KFC. He had NO reaction to it. What was he gonna do, take the compliment?
Great premiere. ****1/2.
The Last Man On Earth "The Do-Over"
Enough. Ugh. Do you know the worst thing? This episode pretty much proved that Phil's "love" for Melissa is entirely superficial and only predicated on her magnificent looks. And the "older woman / black woman" thing was beyond insulting. About the only good thing about this show is whenever Phil is punished for his horrid behavior. But that doesn't happen enough.
Do you know what I liked? Melissa seriously hates Phil, even before the reveal at the end. I can't believe Phil thought he could have pulled that off. The only way the do-over would have worked is if he took off with thos two women. That would make him horrible but it would certainly involve less hurt feelings. Phil isn't just cruel and selfish. He is stupid. *.
The Last Man On Earth "Pranks For Nothin'"
I think Melissa had the best insight about how horribly Phil disappointed Todd: "He really liked you." That killed me. Because it was true. And unearned. And a trust that was abused. The worst part is that Phil STILL refused to take responsibility. His whole prank excuse and then insane twin brother scheme shows that he does NOT think very much of his former friends. As he's lying on the pool table wondering why his friends refuse to give him the benefit of the doubt I screamed at the TV "That's ALL they have been giving you!" I'm glad everybody finally was willing to hear what Melissa was trying to tell them. To her credit, she didn't rub in to Todd. And she totally could have.
Phil's confession at the end was too little, too late. I think the only reason Phil still has a chance in the community is because Todd is the only other man, and almost certainly does not want to breed with anyone but Melissa. But if another dude shows up, I predict Phil will be persona non-grata. His only use to the community is his genetic uniqueness. I'm betting even ONE more guy would make everybody else kick him out for good.
What I hate most about Phil is that he automatically damaged Carol's relationship with Gail and Erica. And with only six known people on Earth that is a HUGE sin. Is the show going to start getting into politics the more people that show up? That would be very interesting to me. For some reason, the more people show up, the more interesting the show is.
I have to say, even though I hate Phil so much, I like the other characters enough that if the show is renewed I will stick with it for another season at least. The show has gotten good even if the main character is reprehensible. Because at least now everybody knows it. I will also give it something else: it makes an impression. I'm still thinking about this episode hours later and I REALLY want to know what happens next. I don't necessarily LIKE watching the show, but I'm absorbed by it anyways, probably due to Todd and Melissa. That's a good thing. ****.
Bates Motel "Norma Louise"
That look on Dylan's face upon seeing Norman in Norma's robe said one thing to me: "I'm in over my head."
I don't think even NORMA is aware that Norman is that specifically messed up. I have to conclude that the romance might be over for Emma and Norman. It might not, but it would be perfectly understable is Emma lost every single bit of desire she ever felt for him upon seeing him in that state. The look he gave Caleb at the end was bone-chilling. "MINE!"
I'd feel more sympathetic about Norma's plight if she wasn't such a bad mother. She claims that because she's a parent she doesn't get to not talk to her kid's father because he raped her. And yet, that is PRECISELY what she did. I'll give her this: she understands the ugly moral of The Giving Tree better than that book's legion of misguided fans. The Giving Tree is a chump and the Boy is a taker and an abuser. That's it. There is no higher moral than that. I get the "Unconditial love" thing, but when the person you love starts hacking off your limbs, maybe it's okay to stop loving them. That is a condition I don't think ANYONE should have a problem meeting. Not dismemberinng your loved one is pretty much the absolute least you can demand out of a relationship.
The therapist is all like "I'll lose my license", and Norma doesn't care. I hate that she went to the car with that guy, and then did what she did, and I resent that the writers are trying to make me think that she is a tease. That is not something I need to think about the character to make the ending of when she inevitably spurns Norman stronger. It would played exactly as well if they never wrote that scene.
I was shocked that Romero killed Kenny Johnson, but only because I thought he was too weak in that moment to do it. Johnson was an IDIOT to threaten Romero like that, especially alone. He thinks he's giving him a no-win ultimatum and being David Xanatos. Well, killing Johnson didn't actually SOLVE the problem for Romero. But it SIMPLIFIED it. Big time. Can't believe Johnson's character did not see the VERY gaping hole in the plan of him being crucial to Romero's survival. Darwin Award.
This show is nuts. Four stars just for Romero killing that guy. ****.
The Following "Flesh & Blood"
I'm not going to say that nosy woman earned a Darwin Award and deserved to be killed. But there is usually a very specific reason you should not poke your nose into somebody else's business, especially someone you don't know or trust. Big mistake.
By the way, Ryan was right to kick that dude out of his house. I don't even agree with Ryan slightly about the death penalty, but it was the absolute wrong thing to do in Ryan's own house after the trauma he had been through. The guy was looking to be a jerk.
That whole ending killed me. Theo is such a scumbag. I cannot wait to see him brought down. ***1/2.
Walt Disney's Mickey Mouse "Outwits The Phantom Blot" By Floyd Gottfredson
My childhood died after reading this. I am now an older and wiser person, but also a markedly more unhappy one too. This volume of Mickey Mouse stories contains a couple of stories so full-stop racist that I have to just out and out say I am no longer a Floyd Gottfredson fan. Now I can't stand him. And frankly, I don't think any other Disney fan should either.
It is true that "Mickey Mouse Outwits The Phantom Blot" is the single greatest Mickey Mouse story ever told, comic or animated. But from what I gather D.W. Griffith also did a LOT of great films besides Birth of a Nation. But because Birth of a Nation is KKK propaganda I have no interest in seeing them. "Phantom Blot", "Blaggard Castle", and "Island In The Sky" are pretty much perfect stories. But if I had a choice that if they never existed neither would "Mickey Mouse Meets Robinson Crusoe", I'd make that trade in a heartbeat.
The essayists in the accompanying featurettes pretty much admit how horrible this story, is but lay the blame that it was just a sign of the times, and that people who knew Gottfredon said he wasn't personally racist. After reading that story I was like "Why are they even trying to defend that guy? Why even bother?" Wouldn't Occam's Razor imply that if a guy wrote a bunch of stories straight out of minstrel shows that portrayed all black people as apes, savages, and cannibals, that the person actually believed that? If it was just a few instances like Carl Barks, I could look past it, but Gottfredson is pretty much unending ugliness sprinkled with a few good stories in between. I would actually argue that there are many more ugly stories than outright good ones. With Fantagraphics reprinting these stories unedited I can't even enjoy many of the stories I loved as a kid that the Gladstone Editors wisely trimmed out the offensive parts of. Because now I see them as they were originally intended and they suck.
The essayists are SUCH Floyd Gottfredson fans that it is hard to reconcile that they all agree some of this stuff is completely out of bounds, and yet... for some reason, they are still fans. For me? Mickey Mouse comics are not the hill I choose to die on. Why should I continue to defend the indefensible? Maybe instead of instinctively defending them because I loved them as a kid, I admit that Floyd Gottfredson was a lousy storyteller and a lousier human being. Maybe I have enough integrity to acknowledge that me defending Gottfredson over the years was wrong, and that there is nothing he could possibly do to repair how I see him now. The essayists seem to be willing to look past Gottfredson's intense racism to enjoy the few stories where that wasn't a problem at all. I'm not willing to do that. Not anymore. Collection Overall: 0.
"Mighty Whale Hunter":
This is the best Gottfredson story I never read. The message is ANTI-whaling and there is a lot of action and great artwork. Mickey is especially clever in it too, first by getting the Captain to admit his room wasn't TOO messy after all because he had been the only one in it, and then by correctly surmising the female whale would follow them back to the ship because she'd want to eat them. There are a ton of Gottfredson stories better than this. But this is the best one I hadn't ever read before. All of the other "new" finds were pretty much abhorrent. This was great. ****.
"The Plumber's Helper":
A lot about this story bothers me but I'm having a tough time putting my finger on it. It seems vaguely anti-union, but Gottfredson is clever enough to hide his tracks using dogwhistles (for the most part). It is just REALLY disheartening to see the guy who used to write such empowering stories for the little guy turn into a conservative crank against the New Deal and so-called welfare mooches. The essayist says Gottfredson turned cynical. That's a polite way to say "into a rightwing nutjob." It is REALLY hard to excuse Gottfredson's unending racism when we see he turned on the Democratic Party pretty much the exact same time as the Dixiecrats did. The editors want me to think that Gottfredson grew jaded. I think Gottfredson has ALWAYS been like this but only turned against FDR and the New Deal once he worried it was helping "Those people." Gottfredson wrote some of the greatest Mickey Mouse stories of all time, and is second only to Carl Barks in the impact they made to Disney Comics history. But just based on rereading this stuff it is quite clear he was NOT a very nice person. **.
"Mickey Mouse Meets Robinson Crusoe & Unhappy Campers"
Soul-crushing. Every page further I read the Robinson Crusoe story the more sick to my stomach I felt. The essayist says Gottfredson's peers claimed he was no racist, but you simply cannot come up with the ideas in this story unless you have the same hatred in your heart as a KKK member. I'm starting to rethink Gottfredson's entire output. The man had a VERY dark and ugly side to him that was not apparent in the cleaned up Gladstone reprints I grew up with as a kid. A part of my childhood died reading this. I will never get it back or look at Gottfredson the same way again. It seems inexplicable that this story is paired up with the adorable Unhappy Campers which is a story I remember reading on summer vacation as a kid and loving. We always wanted a complete set of Gottfredson's work. Maybe we shouldn't have. Overall: 0.
Mickey Mouse Meets Robinson Crusoe: That was ugly. It hurt to read. It is without a doubt the single worst Disney comic book story I have ever read. By far. And it isn't even a contest. 0.
Unhappy Campers: For some strange reason I couldn't enjoy the story immediately following that disgusting Crusoe one. And I loved it as a kid. I always loved Goofy's threat of wanting to get his hands on the fellow who wrote that book and Morty and Ferdie's new character designs are adorable. I set the book down after this because I wanted to take a little bit of time away from it before rereading Phantom Blot. I didn't need that on my mind when I read it. ****.
"Mickey Mouse Outwits The Phantom Blot":
Love him or hate him, there is no denying that Floyd Gottfredson wrote the very best Mickey Mouse story of all time. Barks and Don Rosa have come up with a few stories set in the Duckverse that were better. But there has NEVER been a better Mouseverse one. Never. Not one. The entire story is kind of ghastly to be honest, especially the Blot's insistence at the end that he has a gentle heart because he can't stomach witnessing his gruesome deathtraps to their conclusions. That is REALLY psychologically twisted and seems better suited to a rogue of Batman's rather than Mickey Mouse. But WHAT a rogue. I'm going to say something controversial (and I KNOW Don Rosa will disagree). Carl Barks never came up with a villain as good as The Phantom Blot. Never. Magica De Spell, The Beagle Boys, and Flintheart Glomgold each have their charms, but in every single one of their adventures, they are less interesting than Scrooge and Donald themselves. I cannot WAIT to see the Blot pop up and every time we see his horrifically scary character design my heart beats a little faster. That NEVER happens with Scrooge rogues. The only other fictional character I can think of off the top of my head with that sustained level of perfect awesomeness is Beetlejuice in the movie Beetlejuice. But the Blot is amazing. The deathtraps were ingenius in their simplicity. I also loved that none of them fudged the weird premise of the Blot constructing traps that made you kill yourself rather than have the Blot do it himself. They didn't cheat even once (even with the sleeping powder!), and Gottfredson probably could have gotten away with it. But the Blot's sick motives are entirely consistent. The one bad thing about the story is that whenever Mickey went back to Peg-Leg Pete after this it was now a let-down. Pete has ALWAYS been a lame villain (especially since he's Mickey's Big Bad) but after the Blot he is wholly inadequate, and the fact that he is used so often is quite embarrassing. Frankly, most of Gottfredson's output is embarrassing, but the fact that a villain as great as the Blot came and went just made every single lame Peg-Leg Pete story that much less special. *****.
"The Miracle Master":
Good and bad. The bad: racism. Much more than there was when Gladstone edited out the offensive bits when I first read it. Also, Gottfredson seems to be taking more swipes at the ungrateful poor and the New Deal. That is just unpleasant. The good: the "It was all a dream" ending was nowhere NEAR as annoying as the essayists claim. As the story got more surreal it seemed less of a way for Gottfredson to buy his way out of it, and more of the most appropriate and fitting end ever. I also really liked the joke of the guy who slept on a bed of nails complaining that his wife ate crackers in bed. That was funny. ***.
"An Education For Thursday":
The essayists claim this story seems to be an apology of sorts by Gottfredson for the Crusoe story. Gottfredson can stuff his apology. If anything this is even MORE offensive because Gottfredson actually thinks he's being complimentary. Minnie calls Thursday an "ape", Mickey tries to sell him to the freak show, and the threat of a concentration camp is looming for him and Mickey. I'm not even joking about that last bit. It is actually in the story. Dave Barry is not making this up. If there is an afterlife, I hope Gottfredson is burning in hell for the amount of small children he indoctrinated into the depths of his hatred and racism. He normalized this stuff and it sickens me how much Disney has cleaned up his reputation amongst the public. His output is pretty much indefensible. 0.
Behind The Scenes: The Blot Thickens
These are the Blot scenes I grew up with as a kid. Now seeing the original story in this volume, I finally realize how absolutely inferior they are. **.