Too Much Walkin', Shoes Worn Thin...Too Much Trippin' And My Soul's Worn Thin.

[masterrei]

I realized today that I harbor quite a bit of jealously towards people that I know that have spouses and children. Mainly people I went to school with and the such. It really hammers in the fact that for the last 6 years, my personal life has been in stasis. I have been stunted socially and mentally by the military. I suppose it's just another reason why I resent the Army so much. It really has cost me quite a bit without really giving much back in return. Granted, I've met some of the greatest friends a man could ask for. But, whose to say I wouldn't have met people of a similar caliber on the outside? Haha. Actually, I know I wouldn't meet people of the same caliber as my friends on the outside. But, maybe the people I would have met would have come with a lesser price tag, so to speak. I mean, Hell, I've seen more people die than I have had sex with. Hmm...Odd that I would make an analogy out of those two things. Maybe that whole Eros and Thanatos theory is true...Weird. Anyways, I digress. Geez...I'm going to be that creepy older guy I used to see in class and wonder "Where the fuck did THAT guy go wrong in life to end up here at this age?" Pretty fucking lame, if you ask me. All the more reason I need to settle somewhere in which I know some people. Networking with a bunch of 18-19 year olds is going to get me no where, really. However, I guess I would be a hit with them, being able to buy booze and having my own places and the such. Wooo! I get to look forward to being used by teenagers as a way to make friends when the Army is finished with me.

P.S. Not sleeping is not so much fun...