Ghosts of the past...

[malisan]

Ghosts of the past haunt me. Memories and aches and pains long dead rising to the fore once more to bring me into the delusional decay I thought left behind. The things I have hated and worked to purge are once again thrust in my face with macabre consistency. Reminders everyday of everything I have failed at, everything I have done wrong. The

Comments

[kagetamashii]

Morgon, I do not read this and pity you or anything else. I do not believe any of those things were your fault, though I can understand you feeling as though they were. I can understand why you blame yourself. You just have to remember, hun, we all make mistakes. We all do things we are not proud of. We all have a monster inside of us, a dark side, even. It exists in every single living creature on the face of this earth. Bad things happen to people, and some times they do not deserve it, but it's life. You have to accept it and move on. Blaming yourself for these things that happened so long ago isn't going to help the people involved, nor is it going to make their lives today any easier. All it is going to do is consume you with a guilt that will eat away at your very core. Everything that happens happens for a reason. We do not always understand why, but there are reasons behind it. Some lessons are learned hard. I have yet to meet one person who can honestly look back and say there is nothing they have done that are not sorry for. Not necessarily regret, but that they realize in retrospect they could have handled the situation differently, possibly with a better outcome. With a lot of people it is a constant struggle to keep check on their dark side. It doesn't make them a monster. The very fact that they do struggle to keep in check proves otherwise. You are a good person, Morgon, believe it or not. OK, so you've done somethings in the past you aren't proud of. It's part of being human. So, you feel guilty for those things, that just proves you are a good person. If you were truly a monster you would not feel the guilt that you feel. Though I will say again, I do not believe those things were your fault. I know you probably do not listen to country, but there is a song by George Jones called "Choices." I think you should listen to it. It rings true for everyone. We are all living and dying with the choices we have made. Not to say they will all be right or that you will never feel guilt or regret for them, but it's just life. Living and dying with the choices we make.

*hugs* I love ya man, and any time you need me I am here for you.

Remember Bro-

[drkvamp]

V"""V

Well, we all have a face that we hide away forever
And we take them out and show ourselves when everyone has gone.
Some are satin, some are steel,
Some are silk and some are leather.
They're the faces of a stranger,
But we'd love to try them on.

Well, we all fall in love,
But we disregard the danger,
Though we share so many secrets,
There are some we never tell.
Why were you so surprised that you never saw the stranger?
Did you ever let your lover see the stranger in yourself?

Don't be afraid to try again.
Everyone goes south every now and then.
You've done it.
Why can't someone else?
You should know by now.
You've been there yourself.
Once I used to believe I was such a great romancer.
Then I came home to a woman that I could not recognize.
When I pressed her for a reason,
She refused to even answer.
It was then I felt the stranger kick me right between the eyes.

Well, we all fall in love
But we disregard the danger
Though we share so many secrets
There are some we never tell
Why were you so surprised that you never saw the stranger
Did you ever let your lover see the stranger in yourself.

Don't be afraid to try again.
Everyone goes south every now and then.
You've done it.
Why can't someone else?
You should know by now.
You've been there yourself.

You may never understand how the stranger is inspired.
But he isn't always evil and he is not always wrong.
Though you drown in good intensions,
You will never quench the fire.
You'll give in to your desire when the stranger comes along.

Billy Joel- The stranger.

and even though I am not Rose.. I still love ya man.

Heh.

[malisan]

I would certainly hope you are not. 0.o;; Thanks, everyone, for the support... and the harsh words.

[spachler]

XD If you ever need to have reality slap you up the back side of the head like a frozen fish again. You know I'm there for you, man.