The Love That Remains - Chapter 17/22

[lullysg]

Everyone is gathered in Jared and Jensen’s apartment. It’s the middle of the night, but nobody cares. Chad had come with Soph as soon as Jensen called, Chris had shown up after talking to Jensen again and learning what has happened, bringing Steve with him. Danni and Milo are there as well, Chad probably having warned them.

Jensen is clutching his phone in his hands, having called Jared about a thousand times and he can’t stand the voicemail message anymore. His friends have searched around, called hospitals, police stations, but Jared is nowhere. Jensen is feeling weak with not knowing where Jared is and it’s killing him. He can’t help but think someone took his boyfriend, but why would they? Nobody would have a reason to kidnap him, it’s not like they are rich or anything and everyone loves Jared.

Well--except Stephen.

Jensen lets his cousin’s name roll through his brain as he remembers the incident that happened at the bar, but then he quickly dismisses it. Stephen may be delusional and a bit dramatic, but he’d never be crazy enough to take Jared. Jensen laughs under his breath, because the thought is ridiculous and his brain is obviously just grasping at straws.

A couple of hours pass and nothing happens, Danneel has made everyone coffee, but Jensen refuses her offer. He has remained seated in the chair by the window, looking outside for any signs of Jared. He finally thinks he has waited enough, and announces he’s going to the police station, to officially report that Jared’s missing. Chris convinces him to wait until morning, which is only a couple hours away anyway. Jensen agrees, but only for two more hours. He’s desperately hanging onto the slim hope that Jared will suddenly arrive on their doorstep saying he somehow got lost on the way home. Danneel tries to get him to lie down for a while to get some rest, but he can’t. His eyes can’t peel themselves away from where they’re looking outside, and his heart won’t stop racing with panic. He keeps his phone firmly planted in his hand, because no he can’t rest until he knows Jared is okay.

True to his word, exactly two hours later, Jensen is heading out of his apartment to the police station, and Chris offers to drive him there. When they arrive, Chris does the talking, and he manages to get them in to see to an officer. Turns out it’s officer Morgan, the same one who was on duty when Jensen mugged Jared.

Sitting in his office, Jensen remembers how this was the first place he saw Jared. It’s the place where they got reunited. And now, Jared is gone. Tears well up in Jensen’s eyes and he holds back a sob as they wait for the officer. Chris places a hand on his shoulder, and Jensen silently appreciates the support.

Then Morgan comes to the room and both Jensen and Chris introduce themselves.

“Ackles?” The officer asks, with a frown. “I remember that name, you’ve been here?”

“Yes.” Jensen is too impatient to make small talk. “I was caught stealing, was sent to rehab and here I am now, brand new, thanks very much. The reason I’m here is because Jared, my boyfriend, has gone missing and I want to report that, please.”

Morgan sighs and leans back on his chair. “When did he go missing?”

Jensen doesn’t understand why this is so important, but answers anyway. “Last night.”

“Where? Are there signs of a struggle?” Morgan seems almost bored and Jensen has the sudden urge to punch him.

“He just disappeared! He was supposed to pick up a pizza and wait for me at home like he said he would, but he never showed up. He didn’t even make it to the pizza place, someone must have taken him after he left the clinic he works in.”

Morgan studies both of them for a minute before moving forward, resting his forearms on the table. “Look, Jensen. I understand you’re upset, but there’s no substance to build a case here. From what you’re telling me, your haven’t seen your boyfriend in 12 hours, there’s no physical evidence he was taken against his will, and from what I imagine, he’s not a vulnerable adult. It’s not illegal to leave your job and not go home. I’m really sorry, but unless you have solid proof that Jared was really kidnapped, there’s nothing we can do.”

Jensen stares at the officer as if he’s seeing an alien. “So you’re telling me that my boyfriend can be locked up somewhere right the fuck now and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it?”

“As I said, we need evidence of that.”

Chris has to physically restrain Jensen when he gets up and makes a motion towards the officer, having to pretty much drag him out of the station. Jensen doesn’t say a word on their way home. And by the time they arrive, everyone has gone home already, so Jensen asks Chris to be left alone. His friend makes him promise to get at least a little bit of rest, and lets him know that he’s going to be checking up on him later.

Jensen enters the empty apartment and looks around. Jared is everywhere, almost literally since his jacket is thrown on the back of a chair, his shoes are left beside the coffee table. It doesn’t matter how many times Jensen says it, Jared keeps leaving his stuff everywhere. Jensen slowly walks to their bedroom and only has time to take off his shoes before falling down on the bed. He reaches out to his nightstand, where there’s a photo frame with their old picture together from camp. Jared had framed it before Jensen moved in as a welcome gift, it’s actually the page Jared kept, with Jensen’s note to him. Jensen has also kept that picture, cut just to show him and Jared, and it’s one of the few things that kept him going when things got too rough, looking at Jared. He stares at the framed page in his hands, going back to a time where everything was so much easier.

Jensen buries his face into Jared’s pillow, his smell lingers there, and tears well up in his eyes. His heart hurts with Jared’s absence, he wonders for the millionth time where he could be. Jensen hugs Jared’s pillow tightly and curls onto his side. A thought passes through his mind, that maybe Jared could be dead right now…and Jensen immediately panics, as he has to fight for breaths, the thought of Jared being dead somewhere, too much for him to bear. Jared can’t be dead. Because if he is… Jensen can’t be alive anymore. He would never be strong enough for this.

When he finally falls asleep, it’s due to pure exhaustion, phone and picture clutched in his hands. For the first time in his life, he does what Jared taught him to.

Jensen prays.



Jared wakes up slowly, feeling his head spinning. His eyes feel heavy and he has to try a few times before he can finally open them. When he does, Jared has to wait until his vision comes into focus. Then he realizes he’s in an unknown room. Jared slowly sits up and looks around. There’s only the bed he’s currently on, and nothing else. Jared gets up and walks to the door, but when he turns the knob, he notices it’s locked. There are no windows either, so Jared guesses he’s in a basement or something.

Jared has absolutely no idea where he is, or what he’s doing here. He tries to get his mind to focus, remember where he was before there. He thinks he was at the clinic. He remembers calling Jensen to let him know he was buying pizza for them on his way home, but he doesn’t think he got to Pizza Hut. And suddenly, one single thought enters his mind.

Jensen.

Jared didn’t get home, and he doesn’t know how much time has passed since then. Jensen must be freaking out because Jared wasn’t there when he arrived at the apartment. Jared looks around, trying to find his phone, but it’s nowhere. Jared feels panic building up inside him, he’s trapped god knows where, he has no idea what time or even what day it is, and Jensen is probably out there looking for him.

He starts pounding on the door, screaming for someone to let him out. He screams and screams, until his voice goes hoarse, but nobody comes. Jared is thirsty and hungry, he has no idea when the last time he ate was. Jared’s feeling desperate, clueless to what’s going on and how to get out, so he slides down the wall next to the door and cries desperately, hugging his knees and burying his face in them. His stomach hurts and his throat is dry, and Jared cries until his eyes ache.

Suddenly, there’s noise at the door, and Jared fights to get to his feet as someone unlocks the door and starts opening it. When the person enters the room and Jared sees who it is, he lets out a shocked gasp.

“S-Stephen?” Jared’s jaw almost hits the floor, his eyes as big as saucers. Why on earth would Jensen’s cousin take him like this?

“Hey Jared!” Stephen replies in an overly cheerful tone, that comes out completely fake. He hands Jared a small glass of water and a plate with a couple crackers, which Jared takes from his hands without even thinking, because he’s desperate. While he eats and drinks, Stephen calmly watches him. As Jared takes the last sip of the water, he glares back at Stephen.

“What do you want? Why are you doing this?”

And then, like magic, Stephen’s face turns from a blank expression into a hateful one, and before Jared can brace himself, Stephen shoves him into the wall, making the plate and glass crash on the floor, his hand firmly on Jared’s windpipe, holding him in place, his face inches from Jared’s.

“Why??? Do you wanna know why, Jared? Because you are the scumbag that turned my cousin into a fag, that’s why. I’ve watched you two, ya know?? Such lovebirds, it made me want to puke! I couldn’t let that go on, Jared. It is disgusting and I won’t allow it. I took you from right under his nose and he will eventually see that you are no good for him. You are nothing more than the evil that entered his life and messed with his head. I’ll make sure you pay for it.”

Jared can’t believe what is happening to him. He’s half hoping it’s all a horrible nightmare and when he wakes up, Jensen will be sleeping peacefully by his side, and he’ll tell him all about it over breakfast. But Jared knows it’s real. It just doesn’t seem like it. It’s like he entered a horror movie and he has no idea how to get out. When he tries to speak, his voice shakes, and he notices there are tears running down his face. He knows he looks pathetic, but doesn’t even try to hide it.

“Please, just let me go… you have nothing to do with us, you hadn’t even seen Jensen in years. Lemme go back to him, I won’t even let him know you took me, plea-”

Jared doesn’t finish the sentence as a hard first connects to his jaw, making him fall down onto the floor. Jared sees stars, and by the time his mind has cleared enough for him to focus, Stephen is gone and the door firmly shuts behind him. Jared doesn’t have the strength to get up, his limbs feel heavy and his jaw is on fire. He cries until he passes out from exhaustion. The last thought in his mind before falling into oblivion is him wondering if he will ever see Jensen again.



During the next two days, Jensen either hides himself at home crying for Jared or ends up searching for him around town. Since the police won’t do anything, he has decided to do it himself. He looks everywhere, shows people Jared’s picture and asks around, but it’s pointless. It’s like Jared just evaporated into thin air. He knows for a fact that his boyfriend wouldn’t just leave him, not after everything they went through to be together. Jared has made it clear that he wants to be with Jensen, even knowing he’s an addict and with all the baggage he carries. Jensen gave him the option to get away, but Jared stuck with him. So Jensen doesn’t buy for one second that Jared left by his own volition. Someone has taken him for an unknown reason, and Jensen knows he’s missing something, he just doesn’t know what.

He hasn’t bothered to contact Jared’s family yet, but he knows he should have probably called them by now--but hey, sue him. There are parts of him that want to wait a bit longer and see if by some miracle Jared will return. But the truth is, Jensen is dreading the fact that he’s going to have to face Jared’s family eventually. He knows they are already upset, so god knows what their reaction will be when they learn his son was taken soon after his new boyfriend moved in. Jensen decides to wait a bit longer just for that.

His friends take turns in checking up on him, making sure he’s eating and getting some sleep. But Jensen doesn’t feel hungry at all, he only nibbles on the food his friends bring, because the mere thought of eating something makes his stomach turn upside down. He can’t even bear looking at himself in the mirror, but he imagines he must be pale, with bags under his eyes. He vaguely knows he should go to work, but Danni tells him it’s all taken care of when he asks. Chris also mentions that their gigs have been canceled until further notice.

Jensen just wants to do nothing more than cry and scream, because Jared is missing and he feels like his hands are tied, he has no idea where to look at and he misses Jared like a limb. He keeps thinking of Jared’s voice and easy smile, the sound of his laughter and his scent. Life makes absolutely no sense without Jared in it.

Three days go by after Jared’s disappearance, when everything changes.

Jensen is lying on the couch, Chris is there keeping him company and trying to convince him, without success, to eat something, when Jensen’s phone rings. Jensen is off the couch in a flash, picking up the phone from the coffee table and when he checks the caller I.D., his heart almost stops.

Jared.

Jensen flips the phone open as fast as he can with trembling hands and shoves it to his ear.

“Jared???? Jared is that you?? Where are you???” Jensen practically yells into the speaker, the phone glued to his ear. He expects to hear his boyfriend’s voice, however another one, completely different, speaks.

“Hey there Jenny boy!” The voice sounds cheerful, but so fake. It sounds familiar, but Jensen can’t place it at first.

“Who is this?” He asks in a tremulous voice.

“What do you mean, who is it?” The voice scoffs on the other side. “It’s your favorite cousin!”

Everything comes crashing down right before Jensen’s eyes, because maybe Stephen is that crazy after all. He loses his balance, his knees buckling from beneath him as he falls onto the couch, Chris is hovering by his side, trying to understand just what’s going on. But Jensen can’t speak, his body is too riddled with shock. Stephen’s menacing words suddenly replay in his mind and it makes his stomach roll in on itself at just the mere thought of his cousin laying a finger on Jared.

“You are a shame to your family, Ackles! But you won’t get away with it, you’ll learn your lesson!”

“What do you want with him, Stephen?” Jensen tries to find his voice as he feels Chris hovering beside him, clearly understanding what’s happening. “He didn’t do anything to you, please let him go.”

Stephen just laughs in his ear and Jensen closes his eyes, trying to center himself. He can’t lose it now. “Now… now Jenny boy, that ain’t happening any time soon. You see, your friend here has taken you down the wrong path, he ain’t no good for you, so he must pay. And I’ll make sure you understand that he isn’t the right choice for you, cus!”

Jensen feels his eyes burning, but he worries his fingers at the bridge of his nose, trying to remain calm. This can’t be happening. “Please, Stephen. He is innocent, we never did anything to you. Let him go, please… just… is he okay? Please tell me he’s okay.” Jensen’s voice breaks and he hates that it gives him away.

Stephen however, seems pleased. “Don’t worry about him, Jenny boy, Jared’s having a blast. We are having a…. what do you call it? It’s a ’ reunion of sorts with my friends. We are just gathered here and Jared is our main focus. You want him to say hi?”

Jensen waits a heartbeat and then he hears it, Jared’s painful scream, as if someone is really hurting him. It makes his stomach fall and heavy tears form in his eyes. It’s the most awful sound he’s ever heard, and he wants to crawl into the phone and get to his boyfriend.

“Stephen, please, give him back, I’ll do anything. I won’t say a word, take me instead, you can do anything you want with me, just give him back! Where are you??”

But Stephen just scoffs. “I can’t say that Jenny boy, you know that. We still wanna have some fun with this boy here. Maybe you’ll hear from me again soon. See ya!”

The line goes dead and Jensen collapses onto the floor, dropping the phone by his side. His breath falters, panic tight beneath his ribs, because finally he knows what happened to Jared and it’s his worst nightmare.

Chris is by his side in a second, his arms around him and Jensen just lets his friend hold him while he cries. Jensen sobs into Chris’s shirt, trying to speak but failing. This cannot be happening, Jared is at the mercy of some crazy, homophobic dudes, and he has no idea how to get to him. His scream echoes in Jensen’s ears, and he cries even harder.

“Jared…” Jensen tries to choke out between his sobs. “Stephen has… Jared.”

“I know.” Chris’ deep voice tries to soothe him, but nothing can do that right now. And then he disentangles himself from Jensen, leaning him back against the couch gently. “Jensen, listen to me. I know you are hurting more than I can even imagine, but we need to act. We know now that Jared has really been kidnapped, and we need to go back to the station and talk to that officer. He needs to make a case out of it asap.”

Chris quickly goes to the kitchen and comes back with a glass of water, forcing Jensen to drink it. Then he helps him up and convinces him to change his clothes. When he returns to the living room, he is surprised to find Chad there.

“What are you doing here?” Jensen’s voice is hoarse and bordering on rude, but he is too far gone to care.

Chad opens his mouth, but it’s Chris who answers it. “Chad and I are witnesses to the fact that Stephen threatened you and Jared and tried to harm you both. This will help with your testimony that Stephen has Jared, and hopefully the officer will act on it this time.”

A couple hours later, the three men leave the station after Morgan has finally opened up a case on Jared’s disappearance. It turns out Stephen has a record of harassment, disturbance and robbing, along with some of his pals, who are probably the ones also holding Jared captive. Morgan releases an APB out to other law enforcement agencies with the hopes of trying to find Jared as quickly as possible.

At least something is finally being done. And Jensen’s not really sure how he’s feeling about it all, but he knows one thing is for sure. It’s time to call Jared’s family and break the news to them.

Jensen hurries home after saying goodbye to his friends, because he knows he needs to call them when he’s alone. He grabs their phone book and flips through it until he finds the number he’s looking for. Jensen dials five times before he finally presses the call button and puts the phone to his ear. It rings a few times before a voice answers and Jensen replies in a weak voice.

“Hello, Megan.”



Jensen had ended up briefly explaining to Megan what has happened over the phone. When she learned that Jared was kidnapped, she cried and hung up, telling Jensen she needed to talk to her parents. Jensen had received a message from Megan later that evening, saying they would be arriving in Dallas first thing in the morning.

Before their arrival, Chad stops by to bring Jensen breakfast, but just as he couldn’t get any sleep the night before, he also just can’t bring himself to eat anything either. He ends up setting the food on the kitchen counter and promising to eat it later, and then he tells Chad about the visitors that are about to arrive soon. And apparently he decides to take pity on him, choosing to stay and wait for them, so he can support Jensen. Jensen doesn’t protest, he feels better with Chad there.

When Jared’s parents and sister arrive, it’s not very pleasant, as predicted. Megan actually gives Jensen a hug though and he’s taken aback by it, but hugs her back. Her mother protests, apparently not being aware of the fact that Megan is on Jared’s side. But it doesn’t last long, since the reality that Jared has been taken is much bigger than anything else.

“What happened to Jared?” Sherri asks in a strained voice, barely acknowledging Chad and not meeting Jensen’s eyes, clearly uncomfortable to be there.

“Jared… he disappeared four days ago.” Jensen says in a small voice. “He never arrived home from work, and I didn’t know what had happened. Then yesterday I got a call from my cousin… you see, I haven’t seen him in years and he was not too pleased, like you guys, to find out that Jared and I were dating, and Stephen is a nasty person. He told me he has Jared as a way of punishing me. The police are already looking for him.”

Both Jared’s folks stay quiet for a while, processing the information. Then Sherri looks at Jensen with hate in her eyes. “So, this is all your fault!”

Jensen’s eyes widen and he opens his mouth, but Megan tries to speak first.

“Mom…” She starts, but Sherri cuts her off.

“No! Didn’t you hear what this man said? His lunatic of a cousin kidnapped my son because he doesn’t agree with their lifestyle, which I can’t argue with, but it’s his fault! Ever since this… man entered my son’s life, he has ruined everything! He made Jared cut his ties with us, and now our boy is god knows where, suffering god knows what! All because of him!”

Chad starts arguing with Sherri, but Jensen can’t listen anymore, because she’s right. Now that he has seen it from her angle, he knows it’s true. Jensen slowly sinks down on the couch and all the sounds around him disappear, only leaving him with the cruel fact that Jared was taken because of him. If they weren’t together, Jared would be safe now.

It’s all his fault.

He feels a panic attack building inside him, and from far away he makes out Chad’s angry voice and a door slamming shut. He feels Chad by his side, but Jensen can’t breathe, tears falling down his face with the knowledge of how everything that is happening is because of him and it makes him feel desperate.

Chad talks Jensen through it until he is able to regain his breath, and then broken sobs erupt from his mouth.

“They are right Chad. Jared was taken because of me. Anything that happens to him, it’s all on me!”

Chad puts a comforting hand on Jensen’s shoulder. “It’s not your fault, Jensen. You didn’t kidnap Jared. The only person we can blame is a lunatic, who thinks he has the right to decide how other people can live their lives. We’ll get him back, you’ll see.”

Jensen calms down but he doesn’t feel any better. He knows this is on him. Chad informs him that Jared’s family have gone down to the station to talk to the officer, but he couldn’t care less about what they do. All he cares about is getting his boyfriend back safe and sound, and that hopefully he can make it up to him somehow.



Jared feels exhausted.

He doesn’t know how long he’s been there, but he feels like he can’t take it anymore. He has barely had anything to eat or drink in days, he smells, his head hurts and he doesn’t have any tears left in him to cry.

Jared’s whole body aches. Stephen and his friends have been taking turns beating him up and he’s been punched and kicked pretty much every inch of him. The tender bruises purpling all over his body tell a story he can’t even comprehend and he just doesn’t have the strength to get up from the bed anymore. He’s sure he’s gonna die there, and he would love nothing more than that, if it would finally stop the pain. But one thing keeps him hanging on:

Jensen.

Jensen is the only thing that keeps Jared going, that prevents him from giving up completely. Jared thinks about Jensen, about how happy they were just starting their simple life in the apartment they share. Jared has suffered so much because of Jensen, has gone through so much because of him, and now that he finally gets him back…

Jared needs to get back to Jensen. It’s the only thing that makes him fight back when the men beat him up, or when they inject something into his body that makes his mind foggy, but he still tries to struggle against it. Because he has to, because Jensen gives him the will to live.

Jared doesn’t know how much time passes when Stephen and a couple of his pals come inside the room, and this time they are followed by a woman. She stands by Jared’s bed and gives him a once over, humming appreciatively. But, Jared is too out of it to even care.

“Hey there, Jared!” Stephen greets him, and Jared flinches--it’s become a new reflex. That can’t be good. “See my girl over here? She is visiting with us today, so she can teach you a very important lesson. Oh, and Jensen too.”

“What do you mean?” Jared asks through gritted teeth, fear creeping up his body. Because whatever Stephen is hinting at, really doesn’t sound good.

Stephen makes a motion with his head and the woman takes off her dress, revealing her naked body. Jared starts to comprehend where this is all going, and there’s no. Fucking. Way.

“What I mean my friend, is that you are gonna learn where you should stick your dick. And you’re gonna fuck her until it fucking sticks!.” Stephen takes a video recorder out of his jacket pocket. “And your precious little boyfriend is gonna watch, too.”

Jared’s stomach drops, he can’t possibly be hearing this right. There’s no fucking way in this world he’s gonna do this, not in a million years. The girl climbs on top of him and he tries to weakly get her off, but she locks her legs around his thighs.

“I’ll never do that Stephen. I can’t do that, please stop.” Tears are forming in his eyes, because this is a nightmare, he won’t do it. He can’t.

“Oh, I think you will.” Stephen reaches into the back of his pants and comes out with a gun. He points it at Jared’s head and releases the safety, and hands the recorder over to his friend. “Unless you want your precious boyfriend to watch your brain being splattered all over the wall, it’s your choice.”

Jared closes his eyes and turns his head to the side, rivers of tears sliding down his cheeks. He thinks about Jensen’s smile instead.

Chapter 18