happy new year
ah'll tell ya what 2004 was. 2004 was th year I wondered if I was partly gay, in more than a satirical sense; th year I ingested my highest dosage of mushrooms in one sitting ever, w/ galactic results; th year I got cheated on for th second time ever (as far as I know); th year I listened to metal probably more than all other kinds of music combined; th year I enjoyed Happiness of th Katakuris (Miike, 2001, 9.5 stars out of 10) more than any other movie I saw; th year my spanking new laptop got fried, in karmic retribution for th laptop (belonging to my ex-girlfren) thet ah smashed in a fit of rage in 2002; th year my bruddah got married; th year a lady told me I'd been careless w/ her feelings, which was worse than being called an asshole, because being called an asshole is imprecise and easily dismissed; th year after my Tito Winston died of a heart attack; th year my cousin Barb's heart stopped beating for 10 minutes, but she came back; th year I put my own poor heart back together, in a metaphorical sense; th year I finished reading David Markson's This Is Not a Novel, 3 years after beginning it--there's really no excuse, too, 'cos it's v. short and terribly great and exciting; th year I finally read David B.'s Epileptic (speaking of terribly great and
exciting); th year I stubbornly convinced my little bruddah to go back on medication; th year he stubbornly resisted, and den relented, and den felt better; th year I couldn't decide on an internally-consistent system of misspelling and therefore said, "Way-ull, ah'll jest go by FEELING, den"; th year ah decided ah was probably 100% straight, after all--that th circumstance that was making me seem partly gay was a one-in-a-million act of God; th year ah figured out how to do th Ali G snap; th year I met (and hugged) Timothy 'Speed' Levitch; th year I made my first 24-hour comix (crozz fingers); th year my carpal tunnel syndrome reached new and frightening heights, but doesn't feel too bad right thiz minute; th year I (ACCIDENTALLY) made my cousin Arturo (age 2) cry by, uh, threatening to jump over him; th year I rehabilitated my reputation as a hero to little kids by impressing Lj the_living_end's tot, th infamous terror/sweetheart Addison (age 2)--
xibitmylipx (8:50:56 PM): hey there mr. mza
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Auto response from metalhedwig (8:50:56 PM): ilx where x = 4
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xibitmylipx (8:51:39 PM): just thought you would want to know addi told me allll about how you eat worms and you are sooooooo cool
xibitmylipx (8:51:47 PM): he thought you were the best
xibitmylipx (8:51:57 PM): "hes my best" is what he said
xibitmylipx (8:52:00 PM): see ya
metalhedwig (8:52:03 PM): thankz, lady
--w/ a reality-shattering display of annelid consumption; th year I nearly got fired for excessive alcohol consumption in th workplace but ended up getting a raise anyhow; th year mushrooms disguised as chocolate are probably making their way to me, as we speak; th year Boris became th greatest band (in th whole world) until zuch time as Idlewild produce a new album; th year of th crappy camphone
; th year you hovered th cursor; th year I updated 10x in one day; th year I started thinking about EVIL in a serious but woefully unsystematic way; th year zomeone zaid, "Zo why did U break up w/ her? Everybody knowed U adore her, even she probably knowz it"; th year ah zaid, "'Cos ah dread th future"; th year you heard it a million times already; th year ah'm zorry; th year ah kept zaying zorry; th year I got th brilliant idea to zend txt msgs to th Philippines--
Th year I said: "NEXT EPISODE: WHO AM DIEGO MUHLACH?"
exciting); th year I stubbornly convinced my little bruddah to go back on medication; th year he stubbornly resisted, and den relented, and den felt better; th year I couldn't decide on an internally-consistent system of misspelling and therefore said, "Way-ull, ah'll jest go by FEELING, den"; th year ah decided ah was probably 100% straight, after all--that th circumstance that was making me seem partly gay was a one-in-a-million act of God; th year ah figured out how to do th Ali G snap; th year I met (and hugged) Timothy 'Speed' Levitch; th year I made my first 24-hour comix (crozz fingers); th year my carpal tunnel syndrome reached new and frightening heights, but doesn't feel too bad right thiz minute; th year I (ACCIDENTALLY) made my cousin Arturo (age 2) cry by, uh, threatening to jump over him; th year I rehabilitated my reputation as a hero to little kids by impressing Lj the_living_end's tot, th infamous terror/sweetheart Addison (age 2)--
xibitmylipx (8:50:56 PM): hey there mr. mza
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Auto response from metalhedwig (8:50:56 PM): ilx where x = 4
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xibitmylipx (8:51:39 PM): just thought you would want to know addi told me allll about how you eat worms and you are sooooooo cool
xibitmylipx (8:51:47 PM): he thought you were the best
xibitmylipx (8:51:57 PM): "hes my best" is what he said
xibitmylipx (8:52:00 PM): see ya
metalhedwig (8:52:03 PM): thankz, lady
--w/ a reality-shattering display of annelid consumption; th year I nearly got fired for excessive alcohol consumption in th workplace but ended up getting a raise anyhow; th year mushrooms disguised as chocolate are probably making their way to me, as we speak; th year Boris became th greatest band (in th whole world) until zuch time as Idlewild produce a new album; th year of th crappy camphone
; th year you hovered th cursor; th year I updated 10x in one day; th year I started thinking about EVIL in a serious but woefully unsystematic way; th year zomeone zaid, "Zo why did U break up w/ her? Everybody knowed U adore her, even she probably knowz it"; th year ah zaid, "'Cos ah dread th future"; th year you heard it a million times already; th year ah'm zorry; th year ah kept zaying zorry; th year I got th brilliant idea to zend txt msgs to th Philippines--
- To: Diego
I really wish we could sit down together and drink beers and bash people right now - 12-Oct-04 06:39 pm
From: Diego
I just got my cel stolen and subsequently lost all my no. Mario? - To: Diego
Th one and only - 12-Oct-04 06:45 pm
From: Diego
Fuck yeah! Ill be by meself next wk. We'll figure smething out. Maybe i can take a bus 2 you or smething. His penis is used only 4 peeing. - To: Diego
U r in NY, aso? If so: SWEET - 12-Oct-04 06:51 pm
From: Diego
Just landed! - To: Diego
I'm fucking psychic
Th year I said: "NEXT EPISODE: WHO AM DIEGO MUHLACH?"