hello... im a new me...

[loserandrew]

wow.. reading these old posts... amaze me...
i was such a diffrent person.
and who am i posting to now?
no one...
and this is what i have to say...

ahh... im so lonely. i deal with it well.. but i really... just wonder if i will ever get my chance.

i love my new freinds.. some what more than my old ones. they understand me. and im compatable with them. soon i will loose them.. but this is coming out to be... some of the greatest days of my life.

the stress is killing me. i am just drained. and its not even the halfway point of the year...
damnn... i wonder if i will make it.

ive lost touch with my brother... oh well... we dont really.. bond.. or talk much anymore..
im glad hes with hisband having fun.. but.. it upsets me.. that we both could care less about things now. and all he calls.. is for... favors. eh..

im a mental mess... i just wish i knew how to deal with this..

well even though alot has changed.. there are still things that stay the same.
hmm....
i wonder whats next... for me...