herro
its my day off, i'm bored.
so i think last time i wrote i had my interview to be a shift supervisor at starbucks, but i didn't actually start the training until march.. and i've actually been a shift since about mid-march. i teeter between hating my job and loving my job now.. sometimes i think i want to move up in the company, maybe become an assistant manager and then a manager; and then sometimes quitting. i dunno.
i was toying with the idea of maybe becoming a barber since the last time i wrote. its definitely something i would enjoy doing. having my own barber shop, whatever. but now i am having doubts about that because what kind of money can you make being a barber, honestly? apparently all the money is in woman's hair and i have no interest in that.
so i still don't know what i want to do. i say i want to go back to school but i don't want to create more stress for myself having to take public transportation not only to work, drug court, but then school? so i say i will wait until i get my license back (one year!! april 27, 2009) .. but if i was serious about going back to school i could take online classes. right?
this new usher song "in the club" is so good.
no luck in the love department.
i've been working out a lot. i joined the gym. i'm tired of being so skinny.. so i've been taking weight gainer and creatine. i really like working out. finally something substantial to take up my free time. i'm trying to eat as much as i can and for the first time in my life i like, look at calories and labels and shit on food haha.
i've started to take care of my appearance now.. i get my eyebrows waxed (not shaped, just to maintain my natural shape), i go tanning once in a while. my main thing though is getting my beard shaped up once a week. also, i'm growing my hair out, its getting kinda long. my goal is to have it long enough for a ponytail, and eventually braids, to see how it looks. if i don't like it, i'll shave my head. but i haven't had any haircut since the end of september 2007, so its been about 6-7 months.
i'm kind of trying to learn how to cook. i've started making chicken, thats a big thing for me!
i'm really worried about steph. i live with her but i haven't seen her since saturday. she doesn't answer her phone or texts. joey told me she's showing suicidal signs. i don't know what to do. she can't ever find a therapist she likes.
i broke my "clean time" .. i've gone out after work and had a beer with my coworker a couple of times. i don't feel guilty. it didn't set me off on some drug binge. it didn't bring back feelings of loving getting high. it didn't make me want to go shoot dope. i'm confident i'm not an addict. i know i'm not.
so by next week i will be in phase 3 (of the 4 phases) of drug court. pretty much that means court just once a month.
i need to start saving money every month for a car so by this time next year i can buy a car.
dave is in jail. he started getting high again. i'm pissed. whatever. i keep forgetting that people are actually "addicts".
i hope i end up doing something today. i need to get off my ass to check out this new barber. my normal barber is in new brunswick and i don't feel like taking public transportation there. a 15 minute car ride becomes a 2 hour ordeal when you don't drive. this one steph's mom recommended to me. hes in plainfield. apparently he's gay and puerto rican. haha. a fucked up shape up can seriously ruin my whole week so he better be good.
BYE
so i think last time i wrote i had my interview to be a shift supervisor at starbucks, but i didn't actually start the training until march.. and i've actually been a shift since about mid-march. i teeter between hating my job and loving my job now.. sometimes i think i want to move up in the company, maybe become an assistant manager and then a manager; and then sometimes quitting. i dunno.
i was toying with the idea of maybe becoming a barber since the last time i wrote. its definitely something i would enjoy doing. having my own barber shop, whatever. but now i am having doubts about that because what kind of money can you make being a barber, honestly? apparently all the money is in woman's hair and i have no interest in that.
so i still don't know what i want to do. i say i want to go back to school but i don't want to create more stress for myself having to take public transportation not only to work, drug court, but then school? so i say i will wait until i get my license back (one year!! april 27, 2009) .. but if i was serious about going back to school i could take online classes. right?
this new usher song "in the club" is so good.
no luck in the love department.
i've been working out a lot. i joined the gym. i'm tired of being so skinny.. so i've been taking weight gainer and creatine. i really like working out. finally something substantial to take up my free time. i'm trying to eat as much as i can and for the first time in my life i like, look at calories and labels and shit on food haha.
i've started to take care of my appearance now.. i get my eyebrows waxed (not shaped, just to maintain my natural shape), i go tanning once in a while. my main thing though is getting my beard shaped up once a week. also, i'm growing my hair out, its getting kinda long. my goal is to have it long enough for a ponytail, and eventually braids, to see how it looks. if i don't like it, i'll shave my head. but i haven't had any haircut since the end of september 2007, so its been about 6-7 months.
i'm kind of trying to learn how to cook. i've started making chicken, thats a big thing for me!
i'm really worried about steph. i live with her but i haven't seen her since saturday. she doesn't answer her phone or texts. joey told me she's showing suicidal signs. i don't know what to do. she can't ever find a therapist she likes.
i broke my "clean time" .. i've gone out after work and had a beer with my coworker a couple of times. i don't feel guilty. it didn't set me off on some drug binge. it didn't bring back feelings of loving getting high. it didn't make me want to go shoot dope. i'm confident i'm not an addict. i know i'm not.
so by next week i will be in phase 3 (of the 4 phases) of drug court. pretty much that means court just once a month.
i need to start saving money every month for a car so by this time next year i can buy a car.
dave is in jail. he started getting high again. i'm pissed. whatever. i keep forgetting that people are actually "addicts".
i hope i end up doing something today. i need to get off my ass to check out this new barber. my normal barber is in new brunswick and i don't feel like taking public transportation there. a 15 minute car ride becomes a 2 hour ordeal when you don't drive. this one steph's mom recommended to me. hes in plainfield. apparently he's gay and puerto rican. haha. a fucked up shape up can seriously ruin my whole week so he better be good.
BYE