House wifu vs. HERO: Ultimate Showdown

[waitforsuperman]

Who: Alfred and Ion
When:  November 14th
Where: Ivan's apartment
What: Alfred finally realises that the man handing him coffee every morning might be sleeping with Ivan.

Comments

Let me christen my new userpic for this.

[amar_dulce_vin]

Implication was an art obviously lost on Alfred. It required a deep understanding of subtlety, tact, a touch of sarcasm, and the fine talent of not placing blame on anyone, really. But then again, the art of implication only truly worked if the one being accused had an equal grasp on the language being spoken.

So Ion could only flush a delicate pink, clear his throat in embarrassment, tug on the borrowed apron to straighten it out, and continue folding. He set the red boxers aside and moved to a pair that he didn't recognize.

...banana print...oh, honestly. Some people had no taste.

"I--I was-i-it only once." he said lamely, smoothing out the creases as he folded, "I feel not good ask, but he say is fine. A-am sorry?"

...THAT DIDN'T WORK D:

[waitforsuperman]

How was the guy not even shocked by his entrance? He just kicked down a goddamn door. Then again, the poor cousin did have to live with Natalia and her entrances probably involved a lot of door destruction.

Alfred shook his head quickly. He shouldn't he trying impress the guy sleeping with his boyfriend... Who was willingly admitting it as well. While folding boxers- HIS BOXERS-! "Hey, let go of those!" Lunging forward, Alfred snatched the boxers and, not quite sure what to do with them, threw them to the ground. Serves the guy right, touching his boyfriend then thinking he could just fold his boxers like there wasn't a problem!

"Well, sorry isn't good enough," The American said quickly, "You can't just go around sleeping with other people's boyfriends- or girlfriend- significant others! This is America, not some weird country where you sleep with your own family!"

He panted, glaring hard at the man. (Man? Still debatable.)

And then what the tall-guy was saying actually managed past Alfred's haze of rage. "Wait... You're sorry?"

Hush.

[amar_dulce_vin]

"Am sorry for making upset," Ion clarified slightly. He eyed the freshly-laundered boxer shorts flutter to the ground, letting a small flash of irritation colour his tone before stashing it away behind a carefully constructed smile. After all, he was hardly going to apologize for nothing. He'd had quite enough of that back home, and while he didn't particularly enjoy being shunted off to live in America, he was going to make an attempt to...improve himself. Or something.

In all honesty, he couldn't fathom what had...this manchild whose name he couldn't remember at the moment all upset. It certainly wasn't abnormal to share a bed with members of your family in other parts of the world. Perhaps this was just a bit of that infamous American xenophobia rearing its head. Still, the blush lit on his cheeks was more from embarrassment than shame at whatever sin he'd been accused of committing

Yes ma'm~

[waitforsuperman]

Good God, what the hell was going on

[amar_dulce_vin]

Ion moved from the foldable laundry to Ivan's shirts, shaking them out gently and hanging them up with due care. Alfred had fallen blessedly silent for a short while, leaving Ion a moment to organize his thoughts as he quickly ran over a mental list of what he had to do inside the house before leaving to meet Raivis at the office.

"English strange," he replied at last, "Have many words mean same thing, or use same word mean different thing."

He turned slightly to hang the shirts from the wire rack slightly overhead, murmuring to himself softly as he straightened them reflexively. He could practically sense the reproachful pout aimed at his back. He rolled his eyes once before turning back to Alfred with the barest hint of a smile touching his lips.

"Am...you think am...with Ivan--oh Doamne. Nu. Nu. Is cousin. No."

He moved to the next pile of clothing awaiting his attention, a quiet mutter escaping him unbidden.

"Americanii sunt foarte ciudat..."

[waitforsuperman]

Barely catching the mutter (only catching the beginning, months spent with Matthew coming in handy) Alfred frowned. Did everyone in Liberty have the urge to not talk English around him? Well, at least he knew it was him Ion was talking about (unless Americanii meant something else but it started with American so logic would dictate...).

He smiled slightly at the cousin bit though, thinking of Natalia. "I can never be too sure with your family," he said, sipping his coffee, relaxing almost entirely, returning Ion's small smile with a brilliant one, "Y'all are weird sometimes. Well, Natalia's weird and besides your" -utter lack of gender differentiation- "bad English, y'all don't seem too strange yourself."

Watching Ion do the laundry, he tilted his head slightly. "Did y'all say something? And do... you want help or somethin'?" he needed to apologise in some way.

[amar_dulce_vin]

"She not...actually related to me, so..." He let the sentence trail off and cleared his throat to carry on, ignoring the slight sting of Alfred's unintentional insult and letting it roll off his back with only a quick twitch in the corner of his mouth to show his displeasure.

"Am almost done, not need worry," he continued briskly as he gave the dryer's door a gentle kick to close it, "If wanting help, please keep underwear out of laundry. Am never sure what do with. Ivan get mad if I put in drawer."

ARE WE GONNA FINISH THIS? HELL JES WE ARE.

[waitforsuperman]

"Underwear?" Alfred questioned, peering quietly and feeling his cheeks go slightly pink. Poor guy was getting into shit because of him? Was that... guilt? Or maybe he was just hungry... "Aw man, I'm sorry... Sometimes he just shoves out of the window and I end up with his. I'll be more careful."

He clutched his cup a little closer, frowning. "So Ion, why did you come here anyway? Did you want a piece of that American dream or did y'all just wanna live with Ivan or something?"

HUZZAH

[amar_dulce_vin]

"I come here because I told to," he answered simply, lifting the empty hamper and brushing past Alfred delicately to place it in the hall and move back to Ivan's closet later.

He stripped off the hated apron, pulling it over his head and wincing when it dragged the bandanna along with it and pulled at his hair unpleasantly. Ion gave a small huff and tossed the wadded mess of fabric into the laundry room behind him to be dealt with later.

"Am leave soon," Ion told Alfred absently. He eased the empty cup from Alfred's hands and collected a few more dishware paraphernalia abandoned in various rooms before depositing them in the kitchen sink to await his return tonight. "Am not sure what you want to do."

[waitforsuperman]

Alfred blinked at his suddenly empty hands, watching the other man curiously. "Where are you going?" he asked, hand automatically going up to smooth out the long hair (a strange habit he'd picked up with Matthew (after giving him noogies)), "Not to pry or anythin', just curious about what y'all do when you're not waiting on Ivan hand and foot."

He started towards the door, thankfully not too broken, obviously having been treated to this numerous times before. He stood there awkwardly, waiting for the other man.

[amar_dulce_vin]

The words "waiting on Ivan hand and foot" would normally ended in the speaker accidentally having their toes painfully trodden on, paired with a stricken expression, and loud apologetic exclamations. However, the hand on his hair that smoothed it back into place acted as a derailment of his irritation and instead instilled a sense of bewilderment. It was the sort of casual brotherly gesture that he wasn't accustomed to, but somehow he still unconsciously leaned into the touch slightly.

"Have to go to work," he murmured quietly. "Not think you want to stay here alone if Natalia coming home today."

[waitforsuperman]

"Shit- Well if Natalia's coming home, I better get outta dodge." He opened the door quickly, glad to find the hinges still working (even if they did squeak and groan in protest when he tried to open it a little wider). "Thanks again for the coffee Ion, and I'm sorry about kicking down the door and the... awkward introduction. I shoulda known you were better than that."

He winked, giving a small wave. "Nice to meet you Ion," and with that he slipped into the hallway.