You are the thunder and I am the lightning
It's refreshing to start something new at this particular point of insignificance in my life. I'm waiting for everything to either come together or fall apart, really. Everything is stagnant and I can't progress unless something happens, most of which being completely out of my control. That upsets me much more than I care to think about, so I don't think about it. The stress and anxiety manifests itself in other terribly annoying ways that I can't control, like making my skin constantly itchy or zoning out of an entire drive.
So until something really gives, I've got a new and exciting person to captivate my thoughts for the time being. It's truly refreshing to have someone interested in me who seems completely genuine. He's well mannered, interesting, funny, and kind. He shows that he is interested in learning more about me and tells me I'm beautiful. This is a welcome change from before and I couldn't be happier about it. I'm certainly not putting a lot of hope into this, because it wouldn't be worth my time or effort as of now. But I'm quite excited to see what is to come for us.
I wish I had a best friend to share and gossip about this with... but I dug that grave myself. I believe everyone deserves forgiveness, but maybe I don't this time. I honestly don't even know, but it's not up to me. I want more than anything to learn from my mistakes and make sure it never happens again. I want to move on. But I don't want to move on alone. I want to be forgiven, not forgotten. As history will show, what I want isn't always right or relevant or fair. I don't know what to do this time.
So until something really gives, I've got a new and exciting person to captivate my thoughts for the time being. It's truly refreshing to have someone interested in me who seems completely genuine. He's well mannered, interesting, funny, and kind. He shows that he is interested in learning more about me and tells me I'm beautiful. This is a welcome change from before and I couldn't be happier about it. I'm certainly not putting a lot of hope into this, because it wouldn't be worth my time or effort as of now. But I'm quite excited to see what is to come for us.
I wish I had a best friend to share and gossip about this with... but I dug that grave myself. I believe everyone deserves forgiveness, but maybe I don't this time. I honestly don't even know, but it's not up to me. I want more than anything to learn from my mistakes and make sure it never happens again. I want to move on. But I don't want to move on alone. I want to be forgiven, not forgotten. As history will show, what I want isn't always right or relevant or fair. I don't know what to do this time.