(no subject)
I've been fighting with myself since about 6:30am yesterday morning to b/p, go to the gym, and restrict. I haven't done any of it. I've pulled my head out of the toilet twice without actually giving in and walked away. I did binge a bit (:() but I'm trying to be okay with it. Actually, I'm not okay with it, but I'm trying to not kill myself over it. I decided not to go to the gym tonight, even though I didn't go yesterday and won't be going until Sunday night now. But I need to rest my knees, I need to let my body finish recovering from Monday, and I need to do some work. Here's the deal though. Any time I decide not to go to the gym, I come home and beat myself up over it. That's not an option tonight.
Tonight I will:
Get home.
Get my laptop.
Walk my ass to Starbucks.
Get a delicious soy drink (maybe eat dinner?).
Bust out a rough draft to my personal statement.
Walk my ass home.
Paint.
Tell myself that I am an amazing person.
Go to bed with a smile on my face.
Tonight I will:
Get home.
Get my laptop.
Walk my ass to Starbucks.
Get a delicious soy drink (maybe eat dinner?).
Bust out a rough draft to my personal statement.
Walk my ass home.
Paint.
Tell myself that I am an amazing person.
Go to bed with a smile on my face.