Still,

every god damned afternoon,

the windows are black

and my face feels numb

like I've been sleeping and drooling so long I missed the sunset

A muffled panic crawls around my veins

as if everything I am familiar with

my problems

my friends

my knotted hair

voices, car keys, bent page corners

water glasses, coffee cups, the big yard-sale desk ( Read more... )

Every single day
feels like watching a shitty TV program
over and over
against my will
until I go insane
thinking about how much
I hate what comes next

I try to close my eyes,
dream up whatever I can
to escape the noise, be somewhere else

Sleeping is no way to live, they tell me.
But neither is watching TV.

you said that I looked nice today, so you must have seen my eyes ( Read more... )

one day
we walked together
or more like
in the same direction
you had to stop for something
and called out for our friends to wait
but they didn't hear
and went on without you

I looked back at you
I remembered you
and you saw me
even watched as I slowed
and thought about stopping

and maybe you saw me decide
that I wasn't the person
you called ( Read more... )

It's just a funny thought ( Read more... )

There exists a worse pain than being left when you're sixteen.
like being left when you're fourteen.

There exists a worse pain than an empty house
like working to pay for one all by yourself.

That's the truth and the way it is.
It really doesn't hurt so bad.

no one is telling me
how to get through this alone
maybe I'm not asking
because I already know

you said above all that you wish you could help
but are scared I don't want it from anyone else

maybe that was all I needed to read
maybe you're right
maybe now I don't need

You showed me how to mirror your movements but I drowned, I sank into them. We were palms against reflective glass, a perfect fit and unable to touch. You followed me rung to rung as I chased the top of the endless ladder. Caught in a celestial game, a trance of looping galaxies, our conciousness laced into each other thread by thread, frayed at ( Read more... )

For my new English class, we have to write and essay about our summer reading book, a nonfiction glorification of a "hero" Boston cop. There are questions to answer and conclusions to draw but I have none of these ( Read more... )

After all this time I've never realized how scary September is. Everything is beginning and ending all at once, and it doesn't matter how much I want to go back because you can't stop it, or even slow it down. Once September starts we're barreling towards winter at a dangerous speed. There's no way of knowing what lies beyond the foothills of ( Read more... )